Can someone explain the difference between: - Ruminating vs “acknowledging and feeling the thoughts but letting them pass through you but still not pushing them away” And, “Bad” distraction vs. “good” distraction vs. “avoidance?” I’m confused on the proper way to respond /react to thoughts/feelings (anxiety and guilt) for a specific theme.
I think, overthinking it is only gonna stress you out more. Trust me, this is all I tend to do. Forget the little nuances of trying to control everything even in your recovery. Just start by simply noticing the thought, agreeing with it, or letting it be by saying, “sure or maybe”, then immediately do what you WANT to do. Over time you’ll be able to recognize what you’re doing because you value it and what you’re doing because you want to escape your fear. The goal is to never escape your fear. Be in it. But then your therapist says you have to enjoy your life. Then yes still do those things you enjoy. If they become escapes from your fears, then do them when you want to. Not when you want to escape a thought or fear.
@Anonymous Thank you so much! I’ll try this. I think I started getting too wrapped up in if I’m responding/doing erp correctly etc, which ironically just kept putting more emphasis on the thoughts and feelings
@Anonymous I hope this makes sense. An example is I love playing video games. When I had an obsessive fear setback I started playing games every night to immediately escape or cope. Not knowing this was only reinforcing the fear. So I started relaxing in other ways that were more scaring because they were less engaging. Like watching tv or talking with the wife. My brain and thoughts and feelings were screaming not to do it!!! So I did it, got through it, and now those are normal sources of relaxation again. Think of it as taking your life back from fear/ocd one thing at a time. You feel anxiety saying don’t do this activity for many reasons, you can’t do it, it’s too scary/hard, only this certain other thing or activity will take a at your fear, Then you do that activity your brain says don’t. Then sometimes your brain even takes things that used to be coping mechanisms and makes them scary or anxiety inducing activities, then guess what you do those things. It’s funny how we can bounce around from being anxious doing one thing to another. It’s all just an attempt to control our anxiety and thoughts.
I’m not an expert but for me, ruminating requires a lot of time in my head trying to figure it out. Acknowledging the thoughts is just that. However I won’t entertain it but rather view it in a nonjudgmental way and them float on like clouds in the sky. A good/bad distraction is avoidance. Choosing to sit with the discomfort (thought/feeling) is facing the fear and knowing I can handle it. Hope this helps & didn’t confuse you.
@Dee C Yep that makes sense! It seems like my anxious feelings are more “chronic” and sometimes I feel like I’m sitting with my feelings for days on end. Is that normal? Do I just keep sitting with whatever feelings I don’t like having for days without thinking too much into it?
Exactly. You may not like the feelings but you don’t have to sit there worrying/wondering about them either. You can choose to go about your day. In my journey I learned feelings are not facts. It’s like going to the ER thinking you’re having a heart attack and after all the tests come back negative, the doctors tell you that you’ve had a panic attack.
That makes sense. And is a really good point as I never thought about it! I think my biggest issue is just figuring out how to not ruminate or even figure out when I am ruminating and how to cut it off. I have trouble differentiating between ruminating and “being in it” but not ruminating. I think ruminating is one the one compulsion i can’t figure out how to not do
Hey guys I have some questions on OCD recovery. I just get confused on what to do, like some people say to distract yourself when the thoughts come in, others say to think it harder or on purpose or something. Are some forms of distraction better, like exercising and not forcing distraction. A thought can get stuck in my head for a while and I’m not really sure how to distract from it, do I just let it be there while doing something else like the exercising or drawing? I just need some advice. Any techniques you have for recovery will be much appreciated ? Thanks in advance!
What is the correct response to intrusive thoughts? Of course I know that you must avoid compulsions but what is a good mental process? Like, 'Okay whatever', or 'It's just an OCD thought', or 'Mm Hm disregarding'. What should you kind of say mentally?
I’m newish to ERP, and I’m struggling to passively look at the intrusive thoughts as they come up. I always, without even realizing it, have such an awful reaction to them bc they’re awful, that I just immediately want to push them away. But apparently that’s bad. I just don’t know how to change that. One of the articles I was sent via NOCD said to just observe them as they go by, but I don’t even know how that could look for me. Does anyone else struggle with this or have any tips? Thanks in advance! Hope y’all had a great weekend!
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