- Date posted
- 2y ago
Accepting uncertainty
What’s the best way to explain accepting uncertainty? Does anyone have a simple explanation
What’s the best way to explain accepting uncertainty? Does anyone have a simple explanation
Accepting uncertainty boils down to you both acknowledging and accepting the fact that nothing in life is 100% certain. This applies for those with and/or without OCD. It is a major key point and power player in recovery from OCD of any/all subtypes. Easier said than done, but it is possible! Sending love, compassion and support to you while suffering from the beast and battling the monster that is OCD 💌
Thank you for this reply! What's hard for me (and maybe the OP) is that getting this answer sometimes feels circular? (Not in a bad way! I also understand that maybe it's hard to answer in any other way since it's kind of a philosophical thing). But in a way these responses sometimes sound like "you accept uncertainty by accepting uncertainty" which can be hard for people who don't know how to do it and need specific advice. My guess is that it varies based on the fears and degree of disorder? I also imagine this is where the exposures come in, and that it's a kind of muscle memory or "fake it til you make it" kind of solution. Like, most people have to accept some degree of uncertainty, because that's just reality, and the only reason people with ocd can't accept it is that we've developed these habits or compulsions to make things FEEL certain, so when we're forced to abandon the compulsions, acceptance is the only option and we just get used to it over time, with a lot of patience and practice? Is that right or am I mistaken?
I don’t really like thinking about it that way. I view my OCD as a separate entity like a fire. And the more I answer it or try to address my worries, the bigger the fire gets. And fires consume anything you give them. So I just say “ok OCD, I hear you. I know you’re there, but I’m ignoring you and I’m not going to let you ruin my life” and then I try to think about something else. This isn’t really a mantra or something I recite, but I just accept those thoughts as being “there” even though they aren’t attached to me.
I tell myself “maybe it’s true, maybe it’s not. I’m not spending any more time on this.” Then I move on. Also nothing in life is for certain. I could get hit by an asteroid right now. Can it happen? Yeah. Will it? Probably not. But I have no way to prove I won’t be hit with an asteroid. If that makes sense?
Accepting uncertainty ti me means recognizing that anytime ocd offers as an intrusive thought is possible - and leaving it there. No argument, no compulsing , simply letting ocd be annoying and go about my day.
Can someone please tell me at what point did you finally accept that it’s OCD? When did the ERP click for you? When did you just stop buying into the lies of OCD and finally let go? Like what does it take. It’s been 2 years of this for me and I’m in ERP currently and it’s just not clicking 😣 is it just me???
Or thought-stopping, or suppression. I'm new-ish to OCD treatment and recovery, and I understand and believe that I'm living with this condition, but I still don't *get* it sometimes. I don't immediately click with what other people are describing. For example, when my therapist suggests using mindfulness techniques like naming something in my environment for each sense (something I see in this room, something I hear in this moment, etc), I'm thinking, "is this thought-stopping?" because I'm using the technique to get out of an obsessive spiral and redirecting my attention outward. Isn't that a good thing? Is it thought-suppression *every* time I try to change the subject in my mind? How would you describe "thought neutralizing" mental compulsions to someone who doesn't get it? (ie me lol)
Does anyone else experience a moment of clarity where you feel strong relief that the intrusive thought isn’t true, only to then immediately start questioning if you’ve only convinced yourself that because you don’t want the thought to be true? I’m pretty confident it would take some crazy mental gymnastics to actually successfully convince myself I didn’t do something that I deep down knew I did, but every time I resist the compulsions and try to sit with the uncertainty or tell myself to think about what is logical, I usually briefly know that this probably didn’t happen but am unable to move on out of fear I’m just in denial and have convinced myself of that.
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