- Username
- jotomenz
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Ic never hurt anyone ever. I can’t even fight lol. I love animals I’m a kind person. Yet I think about harming people. If I think about all that. Then I’ll think but anything could happen. N it would keep going from there. Then I’ll b freaking out. Your better off to trying your best to have the thoughts and try not to react. Don’t do compulsions. And face your fear. Like I had fear of knifes. I pick them up now. I leave them on the counter. Eventually I forget it’s there. And I’m scared around my kids. I do more things with them. That it’s how your going to get better. Thinking isn’t going to help you.
My therapist told me to do this, too. I told her I didn’t think that would be a good idea for me because reassurance is one of my main compulsions. She talked to the OCD Center in Dallas (I think) about it and they said that people with OCD shouldn’t do fact checks or reality checks and should instead learn to live with the uncertainty.
Lots of therapists who don’t specialize in OCD suggest this because it works for people with anxiety who don’t have OCD. If the reality check involves an actual, objective fact (like that you’re way less likely to die in a plane crash than a car crash), I think it can be okay to bring that in. You still may or may not die in a plane crash, so you’re still treating the OCD with uncertainty, you’re just being realistic about the odds. But if you’re looking to your sensations/urges or looking into your past or anything else that can be subjective or skewed by OCD, it’s not useful. You can find/not find all kinds of evidence in sensations and memories.
@lisa I didn't really understand him I think it was like I don't have that track record of hurting people so there's that.. but it's def flirting with reassurance. He's trying to make me realize how irrational the thoughts are. I think that's only good in small doses because part of me already knows that. Although I guess him reminding me I'm "good" in the moment is a good exposure for me.
Yea. You have to try your best to focus on the moment. Keep busy and b focused. Like listen to the sounds around you. Or whatever your doing. Like the shower I found That was wen my brain would spin. So now I just try to focus on the water and whatever. And it actually works
Yeah I was thinking that too. I'm thinking in small amounts it might ok, coupled with "idk", like, "probably this based on the facts but idk". Then move on.
Ok I think I get it, thanks. The plane one is actually what my therapist and I talked about for a second. I understood it then but not in other scenarios after. Like the thought i'm not going to hurt anyone because I haven't hurt people in the past, doesn't seem healthy.
So your therapist wants you to think about why wouldn’t hurt anyone. Is that what there saying. That sounds like reassurance to me. You should give you thoughts any attention at all. Just a. Ok whatever n move on.
Yea. But you thinking about that your good. Like saying I’m fine I’m a good person I wouldn’t do that is a compulsion. My dr told me the other day to stop wasting my time of these thoughts cause that all I’m doing. I should just carry on with my normal things as best I can. Let the thoughts come and go. Don’t add anything to them and they will pass. Honestly. The best for me was pushing myself to do my everyday things. Just acting like the thoughts were normal . Fake it till you make it.
Yeah im going to clarify what he meant by that next time I see him. And possibly make adjustments in conversation. But, yeah I see what you're saying for sure and agree.
Its bitter sweet when he says this moment right now is good, it's when you go in the past or the future you become anxious.
The past and the future is ruminating. And that is the worst. Wen I stoped doing that I felt so much better. Like wen you start just cut it right off.
I get that with showers too. Thanks for the advice.
Showers and cooking dinner. Is wen my brain starts.
Yeah, when im by myself doing repetitive things.
my infuriated thoughts are getting much intenser. my therapist told me not to reassurance but i can’t help this. i want to believe these are not my actual thoughts and i still have myself, but i don’t know anymore. i’m getting too used to have these thoughts and i’m scared. am i really like this? is this ocd? i wish i could just reset all the memories that i have and restart everything.
It’s really hard for me to let things go. Once I have a thought/obsession, the only thing that seems to help me drop it is saying it out loud to my therapist/talking it out with her/hearing that she doesn’t think the thought is true or out of the ordinary (yes, I realize this is me seeking validation/reassurance). After that, I am able to move on and realize days later how silly/inaccurate the thought was. How does one get past this and manage the thoughts independently? I want to be able to give myself that same validation/reassurance that my therapist can provide internally/independently. The problem I run into is that the thought always seems like such a huge deal, that it would be wrong to ignore it.
You would think by now, I would KNOW it's just my mind playing tricks on me, but I still believe everything. I will admit I had problems with compulstions in the past, but I overcame that somehow, and now it's turned to reassurance seeking towards everything. Anyone have any tips on how to overcome reassurance seeking, and believing all of my thoughts?
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