- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
It pains me to hear you say that. Nobody deserves to ever feel like that - not even the cruelest criminal. This world needs you so much. Don't give up. Imagine about all those people in the future who will get lots of help from you, someone who went through hell and came out alive. Please please don't give up.
- Date posted
- 5y
I am so sorry. I know that feeling. I know this is bot the ideal path but why don't you try some self-managed ERP with the support of some experienced people from this app?
- Date posted
- 5y
Please don’t feel stupid. I completely understand where you’re coming from. I myself still struggle with OCD, just with a different theme now. I had a REALLY bad relapse not too long ago that made me think I was an absolute goner for sure. And still now I am trying to recover. It’s a scary road to walk on when you’re actually facing the anxiety and uncertainty. Your entire body screams that you need to avoid or that you need to check or that you need to ask for reassurance. Whatever to keep you stuck. I understand your pain and frustration but like I said, baby steps. They may feel like the smallest achievements but they are achievements nevertheless. It will push you to keep going. You might slip up here and there again, that’s fine. Keep going.
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you ❤️ I just can't help feeling stupid or like I'm the one to to blame especially for isolating myself I just didn't know enough about it or how to deal with it now I know more and know what to do I've become that bad and that depressed I don't feel strong enough to help myself and especially with no professional help ? I'm sorry you had such a hard time too. Can't help thinking like that, that I'm a goner . Thank you for your kind words though I really appreciate it we're all in this horrible battle together ❤️ I'm sure I'll feel much better when I'm able to see a professional and get my meds sorted. Ocd mixed with depression is the worst ?
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm sorry Fernando I was just feeling so so low earlier. I still am really. But I don't want to lose all hope. Sometimes it's just so hard to keep the faith. Especially when I've suffered so many set backs in searching for help. I want to be strong enough one day to be able to help people like people have helped me. ❤️
- Date posted
- 5y
I wish we could sit and chat over a cup of tea and tell you about all of my horror stories with therapist in the past. I also felt lost and abandoned by the people whose job was to help people like me. It will get better - have faith. The right person will come.
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through. I know the waiting lists are ridiculous and it is hard to find the right therapist. Don't give up though! I saw a lady, who said completely the wrong thing and didn't understand at all! But then I found a really good private therapist, who completely understood! I hope that you find someone who can help!!
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m sorry to hear you’re really struggling. I’m practically in the same boat as you. I haven’t even had my assessment appointment yet. I don’t know what theme or compulsions you’re struggling with, but the more you fight anxiety with anxiety itself, the more you are facing your fears. I’ve been struggling so hard these past few days resisting compulsions and seeking reassurance from others. It’s a long and draining process because OCD doesn’t give up easily. On top of that I have to deal with depression, thinking I may never get out of this and things will just get worse. But it does get slightly easier by each day. I’m doing far better now than I was like two weeks ago. Have you tried attending support groups by any chance? I went to one myself yesterday and it was really helpful in finding others going through the same thing. It can be really encouraging and motivating when you meet others who’ve recovered and are managing OCD.
- Date posted
- 5y
Thanks for the replies guys, I'm glad to hear you found a good private therapist Heleng.. I can imagine it makes you feel so much better. And thanks Koko P.. I'm sorry to hear youre in the same boat as me. I can imagine how hard it is from what I'm going through, Its harm ocd I suffer with and the compulsions are basically to avoid everyone and isolate myself which I've done for so so long now I know it's not how you deal with it but that's what I did and I can't seem to pull myself out of It I also suffer depression and anxiety this is the worst I've ever suffered in my life with both depression and anxiety and also the ocd is the worst its ever been. I'm glad to hear youre doing abit better though and I did consider support groups there just isn't one in my area at the moment and I often feel like no one could relate to this particular ocd. Most mental health specialists I've spoke too treat me like I'm crazy. Dismiss everything I say. I'm glad it was helpful for you. Even if i did find one my anxiety is that bad now I don't know how I'd leave the house. Thank you Fernando you're always very supportive, I just don't think I can do it as I said the depression and anxiety has just gotten so severe due to the ocd being so bad I'm just absolutely terrified of taking the first step. My intrusive thoughts got that bad that's why I isolated myself I'm just so so scared now. I know I shouldn't of isolated myself but I didn't know how to deal with it I had no help. I've always suffered from depression and anxiety anyway that just got worse and worse. I'm stuck in a black hole and can't see a light at all it's so scary. I feel I'd be better off not being here I really do. Can't go on much more.
- Date posted
- 5y
You can always take baby steps. Don’t try to force yourself too hard since you can’t go full throttle all at once with your anxieties. Try maybe going out for small walks, going to the groceries, and see how that makes you feel. I can imagine how the avoidance must be causing a lot of anxiety, but if you take those small steps to face that anxiety it will get easier and easier to face your biggest fears. I used to have Harm OCD myself. Was absolutely TERRIFIED of knives, tight roads, and trains. I used to do a lot of avoidance because of that. But that obviously makes it worse and reinforces your brain that these are dangerous situations to be in. I had to force myself to go outside despite all these anxieties. It’s a living hell at first, believe me. But it does subside the more you do it.
- Date posted
- 5y
I tried too, just little things like walking to my local shop, I did it a couple of times and didn't keep up with it. I don't even do my shopping anymore for food it's all done online. The avoidance and isolating myself was obviously my fault but I just didn't know what to do how to deal with it. The harm ocd got so intense I was so scared. I know I must sound so stupid so many people on here suffer and have been able to push theirselfs to do things and help theirselfs. I just feel I'd be alot better with therapy it's just so so hard to find I've searched and searched. I'm getting sick of my own moaning and I know I must be doing people's head in I'm doing my own in. I admire you for being able to go out and do those things you are strong and should be so proud
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm just suffering so much right now and feeling like I'm not being heard by the people who meant to be there to help with mental health (all these professionals!) I've been made to feel stupid and misunderstood. I'm so glad I have this app if I didn't I'd be even worse and I can't imagine being without this app now I really can't. It's been a saviour, and especially people like you always showing your support you are such a wonderful person ☺️
- Date posted
- 5y
That would be lovely right now a chat and a cup of tea ❤️? I really appreciate all your support I really do. I need to find some strength I know it's within me somewhere it's just lost and hard to find.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
I can't stop thinking about ending my life. I feel like I'm not even living, I'm just surviving. Everyone is capable of being a person and functioning and I'm just stuck here avoiding everything. My psychiatrist said my ocd is severe and it will all take time and I'll start erp and I'm already on medication but I just feel so depressed and like I won't be able to handle erp and it's already too late for me. I feel inhuman, it's debilitating. My major theme is just fear or contamination, I can't even make myself a meal I can't touch anything in the kitchen. I get stuck in the shower for 2 hours and when I don't shower because I'm depressed I feel like a walking germ. My hands are a mess, my school work is shit, I avoid and avoid and I'm just so tired of "living" like this. My psychiatrist said they don't have any therapists available right now like.... excuse me? What do you mean u don't have any 😭 I honestly don't even know why I'm typing this becuase nothing helps, nothing ever will. I'm so deep into this I can't get out, my room looks like shit, I can't live in this body anymore, I really can't. I let everyone down, I am and will be such a dissapointment. I don't have any dreams or goals or passions I just wasn't made to be here. I don't know how or who to ask for help like there's nothing anyone can do, I'm already on meds. I can't keep being like this, seeing everyone judge me for acting insane.
- Date posted
- 21w
I have OCD, but my parents don’t understand what I’m going through. All I wanted was for someone to be by my side and support me, but they dismiss my struggles, telling me to "just stop thinking" and that I’m making a big deal out of nothing. When I asked for a new therapist because my current one isn’t helping—she isn’t even an OCD specialist—they became angry and didn't believe I need therapy and instead blame me for everything. My father was so mad, he insist to gave me a knife and kill myself. He threatened to isolate me completely, cutting me off from school, the internet, and everything else. My mom cried and shut me down when I tried to explain my pain. They refuse to listen and my dad said it’s all my fault. That day they threw me outside the house for a night, and called me back in telling me to forget everything and forgive them, but I understood that I will not be able to mention anything about my mental health or seeing an OCD specialist ever again, I am completely alone now. With no financial support, and now I don’t know if I’ll ever get the proper therapy I need. I’m only 15, but it feels like I’ll be trapped in this suffering forever, I feel hopeless, I feel like shit, I am going to suffer forever with no support and help.
- Date posted
- 20w
I don’t have much of a support system outside of my bf, so I find myself here a lot. I think I just need to vent, so forgive me if I do this too often. It helps to have a community of people who truly understand. I haven’t felt this debilitated by mental illness in months. There has to be some explanation, maybe it’s hormonal, because I feel like I’ve completely lost myself. The panic hits in waves, sudden and overwhelming, like my head is submerged in lava, burning and suffocating. Then, for a brief moment, I feel almost normal and wonder what all the fear was about. But it never lasts. The chaos always comes back. I even considered going to the ER because I’m not sure I can trust myself anymore. Something has to be wrong, because this isn’t me. My life isn’t perfect, but it’s not unbearable either. Since I withdrew from school, I’ve been so much less stressed that even my cycle, which has been irregular for years, has somehow regulated itself. But even with that, I feel like a failure. I was one semester away from finishing, so close, but OCD hit me harder than it ever has. It felt like drowning, gasping for air, reaching for something solid, only to be dragged under again and again. Now, I feel like that again, but worse. I feel hollow, like something is wrong with me at my core. I don’t just feel sad; I feel broken. I break down into uncontrollable sobs every few hours, and I don’t even know why. I just know that whatever is happening, OCD is taking full advantage of how vulnerable I feel. Is this what MDD feels like? Everyone tells me I have it, and it’s been confirmed by my psych, my pcp, and my therapist, but I still can’t seem to fully see it. I don’t know how to separate what’s OCD from what might be another disorder. I’m sorry to anyone also going through such a hard time, my heart goes out to you 🤍
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