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How do I stop the thoughts of false attraction towards a family member like my dad it won’t stop and I feel like such a bad and manipulative person

Someone99

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

You can't stop them, you can stop reacting to them. Trying to stop them makes it worse.

JesusSaves424

Date posted: 1y

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. 🥺 Firstly I just want to say, they are intrusive thoughts. They are things that you do not want to think. You are not defined by your thoughts, okay?? Secondly, with OCD, the intrusive thoughts will only worsen the more you try to stop them. Let the thoughts pass, let the anxiety be there, don’t react to the thought, don’t judge it as good or bad, just let it pass. This will teach your OCD that it has absolutely no power over you. It’s not condoning what the thought is saying, but it’s letting the thought be there but have zero control over you. I know it’s easier said than done, I’ve finished OCD therapy and yet I still struggle on and off with this. We’ve got this. You are not a bad person. <3

Caitlin2820281

Date posted: 1y

@TigerCrusty I am a bad person if I wasn’t I wouldn’t be having these thoughts and I just want to be normal and I feel like when I cry about it I’m just being manipulative towards my family and that I’m just trying to make them feel bad but I don’t want them to feel bad I just want help and I want it to stop so I don’t have these constant thoughts and false feelings taking over my own love life with people I actually want to be attracted to like guys my age and whoever I’m attracted to who’s not a ficken family member

JesusSaves424

Date posted: 1y

@Caitlin2820281 You are not a bad person. No one can control their intrusive thoughts. If I have intrusive thoughts about wanting to kill someone, and it gives me anxiety, makes me upset, etc. and all I want is to stop those thoughts, that is so incredibly different from someone who genuinely wants to kill someone, who encourages those thoughts and has no remorse by it. I’m not trying to reassure you, but you are NOT a bad person. You do not want these thoughts, and you cannot control them, no matter how much your mind might try to convince you that you can. I am sorry you’re dealing with this, and I hope you’re okay. Feel free to vent to me if you need to.

JesusSaves424

Date posted: 1y

@Caitlin2820281 And to add, I used to struggle with the same thing. I’d have crude intrusive thoughts about family members and it made me want to hide in my room all day and it made me never want to face my family members. I’m still recovering from my OCD but I will say that things will not be like this forever. It seems hopeless in the moment but OCD is a monster that wants to convince you that you have control over things that you do not. Letting go of control is taking away the power from OCD

ConsciousPilot

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

Holy cow, when I first developed really bad OCD, I felt like I was going to kiss my dad and brother on the lips. I flipped my s#!t. Then, while giving him a bath, I thought I was going to grab my nephew's pecker. I almost threw up with shame and disgust. LSS, don't sweat it, most of us have dealt with something comparable. Hang in there!!

zzyyxx

Date posted: 1y

First you need to understand that thoughts and actions are not the same. Thinking something and acting on in are completely different. We all have thousands of thoughts come and go every day. Some of them good, some of them funny, some of them sad and sone of them completely irrational. We can not choose which thoughts will come to our minds but we can choose how to treat these thoughts. Just because you think of somethink bad doesn't make you a bad person. Especially if this thought is giving you this much anxiety. Because deep down you know how against this thought to all your ethical and sociological values. This is the biggest trick of OCD. Attacking your values. Trying to make these thoughts go away only makes them stronger. Best thing you can do is to acknowledge the intrusive thought and then do nothing. Yes you are having and intrusive thought and yes you are experiencing great anxiety but you are choosing to ignore it. In this way your are taking back the power from these intrusive thoughts. I know it is easier said then done. And right now you may feel like it won't work and you may still feel like what if it is not OCD, what if it is real? However you feel just keep going. In fact make don't just ignore the thoughts, challenge them. Shiw them you are in charge here. You are the boss. You think about kissing your father, OK cool. So what. Welcome little thought it is good to hear you. Yes maybe i should do it. Maybe i should go kiss my father. How weird would that be, right? It would be a ridiculously funny thing to do, hahaha.

Anonymousssssss

Date posted: 25w

Help

I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.

emmagracee

Date posted: 21w

Help! URGENT!!

I’ve always struggled with maladaptive daydreaming I’ve stopped but I have harm ocd and my brain would hook onto a true crime story and I’d pretend to be a family member/loved one/victim of a k*ller and would make up elaborate stories abt it. That feels so disgusting I’m so scared this shows in a horrible person doesn’t it? And now my brain is telling me I have found k*llers attractive in the past I don’t think I ever did but what if I did I’m scared

Anonymous

Date posted: 18w

Intentional intrusive thoughts during pleasure and masterbation

Hey guys today I just wanted to come here and share an experience I have and I generally don't know what to do I feel like a terrible person for having these thoughts and for thinking them I genuinely don't know what to do I don't know the signs behind it and why I think the way I do but it's honestly driving me crazy I don't know what to do I have a pornography addiction for a long time it's where it's like anytime I'm an intimate moment or am masturbating my head just thinks these weird things always the same repetitive thoughts to of family members your younger sibling or a young child I myself am a 17 year old and I feel so disgusted I feel like I can't live my life anymore I feel like I'm a criminal cuz like it feels like I chose this these thoughts like I actively think them I don't know the signs behind it and I just really need professional help if there's any like therapist here that could fill me in that would be nice I would also like to know if you guys had any similar experiences because for me I feel like I have to rewatch pornography and do it right without the thoughts cuz I feel like the thoughts are just like to prevalent anytime I do anything related to masturbation why do I think this way I'm also just trying to be as honest as I can with this I'm not trying to make myself I guess a victim I'm trying to hold myself accountable if I actually am like this because I also have doubts in my head that tells me that I enjoy these things I feel like I'm going crazy someone help because it feels so real like I acted on them or that I was pleasuring myself to the thoughts and not towards the video it's just how can I live with myself you know also during it it felt like I was thinking the thought for a long period of time like it was dominating my head so I couldn't focus it felt l

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