Really Struggling and need some help

I extremely appreciate how how much of a support network this app has brought but I'm also so distraught by the fact that so many people have to deal with this and I'm sure a lot of people are like me where for years they didn't know that this was a condition or a type of OCD and I feel like they probably feel a lot like me where they were super scared and nervous and afraid to reach out because with it not being so well understood it's easy to jump to the conclusion that you're going crazy

I can how are you feeling right now

Even a small change can be a victory look for ways you can possibly change any compulsive avoidance. Stay in the situation for a small area of time, or just tell yourself “that’s OCD telling me this is important” , “there goes OCD again”. This may help you distance yourself from those intrusive thoughts.

I'm so overwhelmed 😩 I had an extreme panic I would hurt my ex last night so I did a compulsion like an idiot and of course all that did was validate that fear.And when she's at work and I'm home alone I worry about hurting the animals and get an intense fear and end up never leaving the room so I don't have to interact with them I know that's avoidance and another compulsion but the fear that an urge brings us absolutely debilitating

Brings up*

I've struggled with this for about 8 years and everyday kind of feels like a struggle it feels like I can't really be comfortable and just sit with the thoughts I have to almost always use some sort of avoidance compulsion to put myself at ease been so debilitating to try and counteract every single thought and almost make them neutral that I would say probably 6 out of 7 days I struggle some days more than others but it doesn't get any easier I'm currently on 10 mg of Prozac and have an appointment on the 6th to either increase dosage or switch medications

Did you just start Prozac? I know when I just started meds the OCD and anxiety temporarily got worse as my body was getting used to it. If that is the case it may help you see it as an adjustment period. OCD is something that goes against what you value. Sitting with the thoughts and anxiety is not easy. Baby steps in the right direction and giving yourself credit for any victory is a good place to start. Hang in there.

On the 6th I'll have been on the Prozac for about 20 days that's what the appointment is for is to check and see if I notice much of a difference or if I feel like we should increase the dosage

I'm trying my absolute best to stop ruminating I'm horrible about avoidance compulsions though so I avoid knives,and guns as well as people or things that make me feel uncomfortable or I have intrusive thoughts about it's hard to notice any victories when I'm constantly isolating