I feel a lot of shame for ever having watched porn in the past, I have moral scrupulosity OCD, and my thoughts are always like "what if you're a bad person because you watched porn in the past because good moral people dont watch porn?" I havent watched porn in a year and I avoid it like the plague. I know its normal for most people to have experienced porn at some point in their lives. Idk how to get over these thoughts, it feels like noone understands me or my type of intrusive thoughts :(

I just stopped, I dont like porn and I think it can be unethical. It's honestly not hard to stop, I used to watch it alot in my teenage years, but I educated myself on porn and stopped. But now I cant wipe away the shame of ever having watched it. I know I never will watch it again but that doesn't change anything for me and my OCD.

Hey man, I just want you to know that if you don’t wanna watch porn? That’s fine. However, avoiding it like the plague is not helping you treat your ocd. Avoidance is a form of compulsion in order to immediately cut off the pain and anxiety. I’d suggest practicing ERP.

And that’s why you need to try and change that. Unless if it’s because of religious shit? Porn is completely normal to watch, especially as a teenager. But yeah EVENTUALLY it’ll come to watch porn but since that’s too much? Start small. For example, if you ever see saucy ads in public, don’t turn away from them. And if anything comes to mind telling you you’re a bad person, tell yourself “maybe I am a bad person. I will accept the uncertainty and move on.”

I’m in the same boat as you and even though I watched it on several occasions when I was younger, I’ve since decided that it goes against my religious/moral compass and sometimes my OCD tries to make me feel really bad that I ever watched it. Questioning the kind of person I am. ERP shouldn’t involve doing anything that truly goes against what you believe to be right. ERP can just be sitting with the anxiety and accepting the uncertainty that you’ll never know for sure if you’re a bad person deep down or not.

How did you stoped watching? I have these kind of thoughts too, but I also have have days that I fall and see, this make me feel horrible

How do you educated yourself, so can I too?

Do you think ERP for me means watching it again and trying to sit with anxiety? Bc tbh I am too scared too. My heart was racing the last time I tried, I know it sounds so ridiculous but porn just makes me feel like a bad person.

Newstage, theres loads of websites and podcasts and books you can read. Theres a whole nofap community aswell, though I didnt really use it myself. It's your choice, tbh dont end up like me though, I feel so much shame for ever having watched porn in the past that I just dont want to live sometimes, I know it sounds sooo ridiculous but that's what my OCD does to me.

For me its a religion thing, as emmers said it goes against my moral and belief, religion. I want to stop watching. I feel I am a bad person because of this, like I judge myself that.

Yeah I guess but there’s also the duality of total avoidance being a compulsion and as we know... those don’t help people in the long run.