shafo
- Date posted
- 37w
do you guys tell your partner you have ocd?
if so, at what point? and how much do you explain? are there sources you like to use that might explain to them what it actually is?
Zoë_84Zoë_84
- Date posted
- 37w
I told my current partner, that I suffer from OCD and depression, before we got together. My long-term partner before him complained about not knowing, that I always suffer from OCD, even when there are no triggers around. So I wanted to be upfront this time. That being said, I told him about some themes, but not about the sexual ones. He knows, that children and animals trigger me, but not why. I have made some bad experiences regarding telling people, that I suffer from POCD, so I only talk about it with therapist specialized in OCD and other OCD sufferers.
shafoshafo
- Date posted
- 37w
@Zoë_84 thats definitely a concern, im not sure i could explain POCD or ZOCD in a way that could make anyone without the disorder understand. my ex seemed to try understanding but this new relationship is so much healthier i dont want to mess things up.
Zoë_84Zoë_84
- Date posted
- 37w
@shafo It's the same for me, I'm not sure, but a bit after I told my ex that I suffer from POCD our relationship started to slowly go down hill. He told me it has nothing to do with me suffering from POCD, but as he hadn't been honest about quite a few things, I never believed him. I know, that my current partner wants to know more, but I told him before we got together, that there are parts of my OCD, I'll not talk to him about. So I stand by it.
OCDWarr1orOCDWarr1or
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 37w
I guess it depends on how serious the relationship is. If it's something you see long term is probably worth sharing a good bit. I wasn't diagnosed until 5 years into my marriage. Not knowing what the heck was going on for those years was SO hard on my marriage. Now things are well, but dang it was rough. My husband now knows so much, and is truly the reason I'm better in many ways.
shafoshafo
- Date posted
- 37w
@Anonymous weve been dating for a month but i really do see us being long term. i just get worried theres no good time to tell them, or that telling them might seem like a bid for attention. like, i know they have depression and anxiety and stuff but its not like they go out of their way to confess their specific diagnoses, it feels unnatural but i suppose thats the overthinking haha
Steven55!Steven55!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 37w
Yes, once you feel you can trust this person and feel comfortable disclosing it, revealing your OCD can be helpful and cathartic. If you decide to do it, go on YouTube and check out the NOCD videos designed to explain to loved ones what you're going through. Share one with your partner and then explain your OCD journey. I know it was cathartic and a big relief to disclose it to my wife. Hope this helps.
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- Date posted
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Anonymous
- Date posted
- 19w
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Hello everyone! Is there anyone who told their partners that you experienced POCD in the past or that you are experiencing right now? How did they handle it? Did they understand it? Were they supportive? I'm creating future scenarios in my mind that I need to confess this to a future partner.
anonn
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 12w
Managing ROCD/SOOCD with a partner
Hi all! I was wondering if anyone being treated with ROCD and/or SOOCD has some advice on how they handle the things *with* their partner. For context, my ex and I were together ~7 months before we broke up a year ago, in large part due to my severe anxiety from untreated ROCD/SOOCD. I’ve gotten a lot better through NOCD treatment and we’ve been friends since then. But we’re currently in a “situationship” kind of stage, where I think we’re both trying to figure out if the relationship is still feasible, and I’m finding that I’m a lot more triggered as the relationship nears becoming “serious” again. We’re both really trying to figure out the healthiest way to handle when things get hard for me. Does anyone have input about what they’ve learned or found what has worked in their own relationships? Some specific questions: - I’ve found that when getting really triggered in my own head, I have no clue if I should explain how I’m feeling to my partner or how we should address it together. How do you differentiate between communicating versus falling into the confessing/reassurance trap? - Related to the above, my partner and I are both a bit lost on the best way for him to respond when I’m really paranoid (for examples, I have major I’m-being-cheated-on paranoia and overanalyze if I’m enjoying sex enough), or if I’m overreacting to feeling rejected/misunderstood (e.g. “he didn’t respond to my comment just now, he doesn’t care/he doesn’t get me/maybe we shouldn’t be together…”) - How much does your partner know about ROCD/SOOCD in general? How much have you shared with them about your thoughts and experiences? I’ve explained both subtypes and some of my thought processes to him, but definitely not all of it, and I’m not sure how much is helpful for him to know. Answers to any or all of the questions are very much appreciated. Thanks so much in advance! Hope you’re all well 💗
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