bay97
- Date posted
- 5y
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
I would really recommend doing small exposures. That's what I'm doing- pushing myself to leave the house every day to do something and only wash hands as much as we are supposed to and not thinking about it any more once I have washed. We can definitely teach our brains that the worst possible outcomes and consequences don't happen when we take those little risks, and that build up our confidence. Life is all about risk, even at risky times like right now. The only thing I can really tell you for sure is that obsessing and restricting your life beyond what is recommended by health authorities is not going to do anything to prevent the bad things from happening. It is only going to make you suffer and waste your time and energy in the meantime. Don't let this completely fill your life up. Take breaks from thinking about it by saying to yourself "I WILL worry about this but not right this moment" and doing something enjoyable like some artwork or reading or watching a movie. During that time when you get intrusive thoughts and urges to check that you've done everything to keep yourself safe, continue saying to the thoughts that you WILL engage with them but not right now. Every little helps. Over time this can really reduce your general anxiety and should stop you from feeling like you're really on the edge. Remember, those urges to think about it are intrusive thoughts, and ruminating about it even without doing anything physically is still a compulsion and will make the cycle continue. Allow yourself to take these periods of not thinking about it at all so that your anxiety can come down enough to do small exposures. Small exposures could be touching things and resisting the compulsion to wipe down the objects etc and saying to yourself "maybe the virus is there and maybe it's not", not trying to reassure yourself, just sitting with that anxiety until it reduces. And it will reduce. I promise. All feelings, when we allow ourselves to feel them without acting on or judging them, eventually ebb away. You have the capacity to do that with all feelings and to feel a real sense of peace and acceptance once you have let yourself digest the feelings. The best way out is through. You can do it
bay97bay97
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much for the advice, that is really helpful. I honestly am letting it control my life atm but I’ve been trying to do small exposures. I’m planning on going to the grocery store w my mom in the next few days-so that will be one of my first exposures. I also have been going to therapy every week and had to touch a few things like a pen to sign something, etc. so I’ve been obsessing about that.. but trying to sit with the thoughts and let them pass.
ninagnesninagnes
- Date posted
- 5y
I am also trying to be mindful about how I react to the current virus. It's tough because it seems like the whole world around me is acting out compulsions and washing their hands constantly. I read a good article on vice about it, ocd and Corona or something. I'm also doing a lot of meditation and yoga to calm the anxiety and not try to act beyond the guidelines. It's tough, really, the fear is there but I'm trying to not give in. Stay strong. Pandemic will pass on it's on, ocd is harder to push back once it's over.
bay97bay97
- Date posted
- 5y
I really hope all of this is over quickly. Before this all went down I was doing really good with ERP. It literally feels like the world is ending or something
bay97bay97
- Date posted
- 5y
I’ve also been washing my hands way past 30sec, have had a hard time touching things in my house that are touched by family members like doorknobs, and have been afraid to wash my face with my hands or even get my hands near my face..
green bean green bean
- Date posted
- 5y
u got this!! I believe in you
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
One amazing book I recommend to all OCD sufferers is called "letting go" by David R Hawkins. It's a wonderful book which guides you through sitting with uncomfortable feelings, noticing and letting them be felt in your entire body without resisting them, acting on them, ruminating on them or judging them or yourself for having them. Just feeling them until they're gone. It's a beautiful experience.
bay97bay97
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you for the recommendation. That is something my therapist has been advising me to do and it’s very helpful. It’s just been hard for me to do it recently with everything that’s going on since it feels like the worlds ending.
Related posts
SMS719
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 25w
Feeling hopeless 💔
My ocd has been at an extreme all time high the past 2 weeks and I am in dire need of some relief. I’m not sleeping right anymore. for context: I live in the south and found a springtail on my sheets about 2 weeks ago. This was like 2 days before our bug guy came and sprayed (it’s a normal maintenance thing here) so it’s a common bug down here and I’ve found them all over different areas of the house before. Finding it in my bed sent me on a bit of a spiral bc I started to doubt if it even was a springtail and that i was wrong and that it was a bed bug, not trusting my brain. It was a bad, sleepless night and carried over continuing feelings. Typical ocd stuff. Well two days later, I’m a nurse and I had a patient that actually had bed bugs. This wasn’t the first day they were here and I did not see any myself but it still freaked me out. There had one 2 founds after visitors came the day before. Of course I wore PPE in the room (coveralls shoe covers and hair net) going in and took everything off before exiting the room. When I came home I stripped in my garage and bagged everything down to my shoes. Threw everything in the wash and did multiple cycles. There were no other steps I could take but I still had a terrible night. Hours of ruminating and going back and forth about tracing my tracks, thinking of new ways I could’ve taken one home with me. Just checking everything. I was already on a spiral from the springtail. Having two such back to back triggering events for me so closely related has made me deteriorate significantly. I was already doing bad with my normal OCD and starting therapy here. I obsess over the thought of having bedbugs constantly and haven’t been able to sleep. I am constantly checking my bed while in it and can’t settle down. My bed is heavy too and I keep hurting myself lifting my mattress to check. But I need to check. I’ve become obsessed. I check everything and go down Reddit rabbit holes looking for new things. And of course, I talk myself into it every time. I can’t take it anymore, it’s bleeding off into other parts of my life like friendship and marriage because I am so high anxiety right now. I need relief so bad. I’ve never felt this unstable to be honest. I feel like even someone without ocd would be really struggling with this topic, nevermind me, with ocd to a point where I just started treatment. These aren’t even my normal intrusive thoughts and compulsive acts. It’s just taken on a life in the last week and I can’t find any sign that it’s going to slow down. when I think rationally I know I did everything right to prevent but I can’t shake it. 💔
hestia
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 23w
I Need Help
I’m trying to do ERP therapy, but I keep thinking my subtype of ocd is the worst there ever is. I tried going on a walk tonight and the adrenaline in my body along with the shakes and the burning in my chest got so overwhelming. I felt like I was just about to lay down in the gutter along the sidewalk. I’m not trying to be super negative. I just don’t know what to do anymore. If it’s not one thing it’s another and I just wanna cry so bad and I want it to go away but it won’t I almost feel like I have to call a crisis line or something even right now while I’m writing this I’m crying so bad. I can’t enjoy a single thing. I joined a support group tonight, but I just feel like I feel so bad for everyone because of how awful it is. I know what I’m writing right now doesn’t make a lot of sense but I just don’t know what to do anymore. Part of me wants to quit ERP therapy so bad cause I don’t think it’s gonna ever help. if anyone has any advice or suggestions, that would be greatly appreciated.
jupiter
- Date posted
- 21w
I don’t know how to live anymore
(Long post warning) Hi, I’ve been struggling with severe OCD for six years now. it started in 2019 with my theme being getting sick/emetophobia. it devastated my life. I almost didn’t graduate high school from it. I remember washing my hands for three hours one day until they were nearly bloody while crying and asking why I could not stop doing it. I remember id have to write and rewrite sentences when I did my English homework and that’s why I nearly failed that class. I remember how I would spend up to thirty minutes to an hour pacing the halls of my apartment while my mom was asleep until I neutralized the thoughts about throwing up and I could finally go to bed. I don’t know when it happened, but my theme switched. Sometimes in late 2020 or early 2021, it switched to POCD. It started with a single thought, and I focused on it and it’s been my theme since then for four years. It has been absolutely destroying me. I feel so disgusted and lost and just tired. My compulsions are severe now. I thought they were bad before, but now they’re ten times worse. I can’t eat, drink, change my clothes, walk, or even do things on my phone normally. I’ve developed so many mental compulsions that it’s so intricate and complicated yet at the same time I’ve done them so much that they’ve become normal. An example I have is if im putting on a shirt and I have a “bad” thought, I have to take it off and put it back on two more times (that’ll make it 3 times I put the shirt back on - odd numbers are my safe number). I have to have a good thought on the third time otherwise I have to take it off and put it on two more times to make it five times I put on that shirt. If not that then I just put on a different shirt because the original is now tainted with my bad thought. I can’t open apps on my phone. It’s with the numbers again. If I open TikTok once while having a bad thought - I have to close it and open it two more times and so on. Sometimes I do it up to 30 times. So I just don’t do things usually. I don’t turn on the TV because I know I’ll redo it. I don’t open a book or grab it off my shelf because I’ll have to repeat the action. I can’t even lay in bed without getting up and redoing it even if im exhausted. I just feel so helpless. I don’t know what to do. I feel disgusting and even now my minds screaming at me that I am dirty and what I think is true. I just wish I was free of this, I wish I could just live my life. I’ve wasted hours and days because of my compulsions. I mask it so well around my friends. I don’t do them in front of anyone or I’ve learned to hide it well. But when im back home alone, it goes haywire. I just want to live again.
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