This is more of a personal problem I’m having, but you guys are all so helpful, so I hope you don’t mind if I take everyone’s attention away from OCD for a sec. As I’ve said before I’m really sick at the moment. All I’m really doing is laying around, doing ERP, sleeping and playing video games. (Plague.inc is the bomb by the way. 10/10 would recommend) Anyway, this guy I just graduated high school with has started texting me. We were in the same circle but I avoided him because he’s often rude/makes inappropriate jokes/ has no verbal filter). Now that we’ve graduated he’s texting me all the time, and at first I was polite because, well. Because you should always be polite. But he keeps messaging me 5 times a day asking to hang out. I’ve tried to put him off because I’m a cautious person and hanging out with a guy I barely know alone doesn’t sound like the best idea. But also, as I said, I’m SUPER SICK! My cold went to my chest and I can barely breathe, I’m coughing all the time, I’m not in a position to go and hang out with someone. But every day without fail he messages me asking if I feel better. He says things that are kind of weird like “I really do hope you feel better soon you know. I really do.” And “Its really good that you trust me. Trust is important.” Gonna be honest, its making me sorta anxious! Plus we’re both going to a big end of year 12 party at the end of this month, so I know he’ll talk to me and be annoyed if we haven’t hung out by then. What the hell do I do? Sorry to bother everyone I know this isn’t OCD related...but it sure as hell isn’t helping! (Although it is nice to worry about a normal problem for once!)

I’ve been trying my best with ERP and just everything that’s going on. I have severe OCD, GAD, PMDD, panic disorder, recently diagnosed ADHD, and currently experiencing a major depressive episode. Apparently. I was taking a break from this app but I really need support right now. My family is honestly really mean and not understanding of what I’m going through. Right now it’s gotten bad to the point I had to withdrawal from my last semester of university. My only support is my boyfriend and he’s now planning to join the military. I won’t be able to talk to him for 3 months and I feel really scared of being alone with all of this. I know I shouldn’t depend on him to begin with but right now I’m at an extremely low point and I feel like I won’t make it alone. There hasn’t been a single day we haven’t texted and talked in 4 years. I feel really scared, but I don’t want to hold him back. You guys, I feel so sad and terrified right now. I don’t want him to go, he’s all I have.

Flagged as triggering to be safe I’ve never been in a real relationship before… you can guess why lol. But I really want the one I’m in to work out. Still I can’t help but be scared that I don’t actually have feelings for him. I’m scared that I’m leading him on? And I’m scared because I can no longer identify what’s real and what’s ocd. To make matters worse we went on winter break from college and we are long distance so I went from seeing him every day and now I haven’t seen him for four weeks. I’m going to see him in two days and I was trying to lay out an outfit that he would see me and think “wow” in. But I started to wonder, am I doing this cause I like him or because I just want him to like me and I don’t have feelings for him. I feel like a terrible person. The combo of no relationship experience plus the ocd plus winter break is distressing. (We’ve been together three going on four months)

Hi, I’m new here!! I’m praying I don’t get judged for this. But, back in late May of 2022 ( literally right before I graduated high school), I added this one random girl from my school on Snapchat. She posted something about a graduation party , so I swiped up on her story basically saying how I can’t believe we’re almost graduated. She replied and we had a really short and simple conversation. The next day ( i believe) , we started talking a lot , and I just so happened to see her at the highschool when we were grabbing our graduation outfits and doing the rehearsal. When I saw her irl, I kinda got turned off ( I heard she was kinda crazy) , and on top of that , she was a little ugly irl. I remember seeing her Snapchat bio , and she was close friends with my female cousin ( a year younger than me) , who I happened to experiment sexually with when I was 10-11 years old. I remember going to work later that day and having sort of a lightbulb flick thought ( it wasn’t a good thought though) , what if my cousin told her about what happened when we were younger? So I started to kind of panic and immediately distanced myself from that girl. I also experimented sexually with one of my female friends when I was 10-11 , and from that day onwards, I’ve been pretty much living in paranoia and a little bit of guilt about someone finding out and my life being ruined . On top of that, It’s gotten worse to now sometimes I wonder if a girl I added off of quick add ( Snapchat) is underage even if they told me they were 18+ or had 18 and above in their bio, and I get so much guilt and anxiety about that. I even had a quick thought last February on what if I did something inappropriate with my younger cousin when I was 15-16 but I just can’t exactly remember when it happened , and it still eats me alive when I think about it, because I don’t know if it happened or not. I’m sorry for the long vent, I just wish I felt normal again. No matter how much I try to do things that old me used to do, life always feels “ off”. I always kept the top part about when I was younger a secret up until early (ish ) 2024, then I vented to one of my best friends and he told me that that’s a normal thing to do at a young age. Since then, I have told multiple friends and they all say they did similar stuff, but my brain just can’t accept that. Please help me, I quite literally overthink everything nowadays. 2021 was the last full year that I felt normal ( coincidentally, the best year of my life so far) . It’s not just about sexual related things either, sometimes I’ll wonder if I messed up something at work or hit a car while driving/hit someone and drove off. I just wanna live my life how I was supposed to live it after highschool ( carefree and happy) before whatever it is ( I think it’s ocd) hit me unexpectedly. Thanks to anyone who read this , I just needed to pour it out regardless of how negative I felt typing this, I hope someone can relate , because I feel so alone in my head at times.