- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I just wrote you a big long spill but dropped my phone and lost it all. Anyways, YOUR NOT ALONE. if I could write as well as you I would say the exact same thing as what you said but about me. I guess we will never know. Maybe we are crazy. Maybe not. I guess we might never know but enjoy yourself today by living life. This all sounds so easy I know. God bless us
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you for reaching out and the complement. :) It means a lot since I really wasn’t expecting anyone to say anything. I’m not going to lie you did spike a bit of anxiety in me just there, but I understand accepting uncertainty is part of what I need to do if I ever want to get my life back, so I appreciate the reminder and the support. ❤️
- Date posted
- 4y
Omg I’m going through the same thing right now, these past few days I’ve been in a perpetual state of anxiety. I’m scared I’m going crazy and just accepting my thoughts as well. But we’re not alone, everyone on here understands what we’re going through! We have to just keep pushing through, I’ve gotten over it once for two years before it reared it’s ugly head again. There is hope, we just can’t lose it!
- Date posted
- 4y
Very true. Thanks so much for the support! It helps a lot to know I’m not the only person feeling this way. My last ocd spike was 3 year ago and then all the sudden it just came back. :( Pretty sure it was caused by coronavirus stress and new changes in my life
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel I have been in a anxiety spike for over a year now. It's so hard. Today I slept in till 10 am. Just trying to not think. I'm sure that could be a compulsion as well. But I do work hard. Most my anxiety is triggered from work. I'm not sure why though, so then I'm always in my head
- Date posted
- 4y
Im Sorry you feel this way and I really relate to everything you said. Know that you are not alone and it is possible to recover ! You are not losing it! Its just anxiety that makes your mind go weird directions ( someone just said that to me :)) . Just hold on and know it will pass eventually. That is how i overcome an anxiety peak myself . I remember i had it before and it passed.
- Date posted
- 4y
I know that they’re just thoughts but sometimes I’m afraid that they will or have changed my morality and how I see things. That’s the worst part and it’s why I’m so afraid of my mind. And a lot of the times, even though I’m always doing reassurance, checking, researching and a lot of other things typical of those with ocd, I always worry that there’s something else going on and that I actually think these things and it all just very scary. And then sometimes I worry that I’m not feeling anxious enough about it so that must mean I accept it as a truth and that I’m going to act on it, and in the midst of the anxiety it all seems very real. It’s hard to do almost anything these days because of the nature of my obsessions. I’m forced to be exposed to it everyday because it something I have to see everyday (and maybe that’s why I don’t feel much anxiety right now.) I know that no one is probably going to read this, but I’m tired of this constant cycle of overthinking everyday, and I just needed a place to share my thoughts.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
My last and almost life long theme/sub-theme largely subsided recently and my ocd felt like it wasn’t even an issue. Then I went on winter break from uni and being alone made my mind come up with a whole new topic to obsess over. TLDR on my fears, my advisor wouldn’t email me back for a while about signing up for classes so my mind started to worry “what if he doesn’t in time and you can’t enroll this semester and you lose this whole life you just built and all these new friends” So when that issue was resolved my mind found other scarier ways I could be uprooted from my current life and friends that I’ve grown so attached to. Then my mind remembered back when I was struggling with false memories and scrupulosity and I essentially made a post on a forum 2 and a half years ago saying I did something or was convinced I did something that I never actually did. Now I’ve been spiraling about someone finding it reporting me and I either get seen as a horrible person or arrested or something over something I never actually did but “admitted” to out of fear of going to hell. My mind won’t let it go and keeps finding new reasons for it to be “valid” “logical” or even inevitable. I feel like it’s just hanging over my head and I can never rest easy. Especially when I try to focus on my daily tasks or plan for the future I get this horrible flair up of “why plan for the future when this could come back in that future and you get uprooted from all of it” my mind won’t rest without certainty being uprooted won’t happen but certainty doesn’t exist, at least not with ocd. This sucks and I miss being care free.
- Date posted
- 22w
These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.
- Date posted
- 12w
I know I am going a bit cuckoo because my period is coming up, but lately it feels like every intrusive thought I have, I *like* it. Like I genuinely feel like I like it, and then I immediately panic because I start checking. Mentally, emotionally, whatever it is. And I know that is a compulsion. I *know* that. But it feels so real that I cannot stop myself. Every single time I check, it still feels like I like the thought, and it is driving me absolutely insane. It is especially the POCD thoughts. They feel so real. I feel like something is going on mentally, like some kind of confusion or glitch, because I swear I was not like this before. I would have intrusive thoughts, and they would feel real, but not *this* real. And I do not even know if this is normal. I know OCD is **supposed** to feel convincing. That is the whole thing. But I have never experienced it to this extreme. I have never gotten the same thought so many times and still felt like, “Oh my God, I did enjoy it,” even after checking a million times. It is like no matter how many times I check, it feels like I liked it. Especially during intimacy :( and it is making me lose it. Then I start thinking, “Well, I am in distress, so maybe that is proof it is not actually me.” But right after, I am like, “What if I am only panicking because I care about what society thinks and not because I actually have morals?” And then I spiral again, wondering if maybe I just care about how I am seen rather than who I am. I am panicking so much no today. I had to take my Xanax today for the first time in two months, and I needed three separate doses. I really need some support right now.
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