On Tuesday I was super happy that my intrusive thoughts diminished. Today they are ramptant. My therapist said that the distress from people with ocd comes from not actually wanring to harm others as opposed to actual bad people, their distress comes from not wating to get caught. And now Im wondering the true reason for my distress. Ocd (karen) keeps saying," I just wanna kill someone." And even writing this I feel like Im faking it. It doesn't help that I was woth my parents last night and I imagined hitting my dad with a metal tool. Im in this place where I struggle and wonder who am I? What is happening to me? Ocd says Im faking it. What have been

Hey lunchlysol do you call your ocd Karen lol I love it

I just started doing this after mentioning to my therapist it’s pretty fun. Figuring out how she looks like her name ect :)

Hey lucha! I get that wanting to sleep it away thing. I'm sorry. I'm praying for you. Dunno if this helps but I had a thought today that OCD is really just chemicals or electricity in my brain... Like we yell at each other how much we hate each other, but really, I don't need to respond because ny OCD isnt a person. Its a chemical. I don't have to feel threatened by something that can't even think... Its like yelling at Windex. Idk if that helps. It was just kind of a realization for me. 💛💛 I wish you luck. Que luches like your name says💛💛

So, if you can, reflect just a little but on how this cycle works. I’m sure before Tuesday you had some really bad days, right? Your obsessions were intense, and you wondered if you were really a murderer, it might’ve even felt like you were about to act on the thoughts. Then Tuesday comes, and they’re mostly gone or they don’t seem to matter. What changed? Maybe you did some exposure work, maybe not. Thoughts, feelings, emotions, they tend to just appear. Sometimes they are tied to external circumstances (like being happy because you’re reuniting with a friend you haven’t seen in a long time) and sometimes not. Ever been unhappy in a moment you thought you would be? What treatment is really all about is being mindful of how your mind works, but not necessarily taking it personally. You can see yourself starting to ruminate and recognize it for what it is: just a random phenomenon of the mind. Your OCD will latch on to any thing that can fuel the feelings of doubt. That’s what’s happening when you’re wondering about what your “true reason” for distress is. It’s just a rumination compulsion where your brain is trying to explain away an issue so it can get rid of it. Your brain likes having a job, and it gets hooked on the anxiety/relief cycle. It thinks it’s protecting you.