Is it just me that when someone gets mad at me, it's like my relationship with them starts from square one? I overthink them being mad so much that I can't move past it, and I look for the tiniest little signs that they're still mad at me deep down. For example, my boss got MILDLY annoyed with me because I didn't see a message she sent this morning, but my brain is treating it like she's been on the edge of firing me (she literally just asked why I didn't respond, and reminded me that I needed to be online for 9AM, then we MOVED PAST IT). When this happens, it would literally take the other person to come up to me like 'I'm sorry for getting mad - you don't need to worry about it. I didn't mean to get annoyed' for me to move past it. It takes me MONTHS to get over the tiniest little spat. So so done.

Does anyone deal with OCD in relationships where you’re constantly ritualizing making sure people aren’t mad at you? I constantly ask “are you mad at me?” or I’ll go back and over-clarify things I said and people are always like “dude I didn’t even notice you said something wrong” or “i didn’t even think about it that way”. It’s relieving but I feel like it’s just the OCD getting what it wants out of the ritual. I will say that recently, I’ve been able to let the obsession go in one ear and out the other more than ever before, but I still obsess over what people think of me. Would love to hear some shared experiences or advice.

How do you deal with your coworker(s) disliking you/giving you the cold shoulder after a misunderstanding? I care about my reputation and what ppl think of me (even after I stop working with them). I wouldn't care as much but I work with them and I can't stand walking on egg shells around ppl for 8-10 hrs a day! My anxiety kicks in and my mind starts to spiral and create scenarios and reasons as to why this person is treating me this way. I would say something but I I'm not confrontational.

I started a new job a month ago. Keep in mind I have severe relationship OCD so before I went in I was afraid I was going to have a weird thought about someone if they were good looking. Literally my first day I saw someone good looking and did a friendly smile because I was new and I just smiled at everyone to be nice- I did it again I’d say like 3 more times to that person in the days after and then I suddenly stopped because I was like what if he thinks I fudging fancy him so now every time I pass him I can’t look him in the eyes I look down or rush past looking annoyed so he doesn’t think I think he’s good looking. I’m really enjoying this job but this little thing every single day when I go in now is constantly at the back of my mind every morning I wake up it’s the first thing I think of, every intimate and loving moment with my boyfriend I picture this person (because my OCD imagines things that are bothering me in the best moments so I don’t enjoy them) And I am so afraid that one day someone in my team will be like oh yeah you need to get him to train you in on this because I will actually cry because I’ve built this up so much in my head now that I can’t enjoy my life my work everything because it’s really awkward (or in my mind it is) when I pass this person because I’ve made it seem like this huge deal and it makes me feel sick because I’ve already confessed this once to my boyfriend but it is so STUCK in my head now and of course you can never ask for help on this shit (my fellow ocd friends will know of course and by friends i mean everyone in this community) because people in my work would be like ooooo you fancy him or something not understanding that this is something i really struggle with. And I just don’t know at all how to move past it