Im just here to remind y’all that sometimes it gets worse even when we least expect it and that’s okay you will find your peace again and even though you thought you might not open this app for awhile (aka me lol) you find yourself on it again looking for help and that’s okay it will always be okay, hoping everyone is doing good, sending good vibes!!!

I was going to ask for advice and vent after i just had an episode but reading through everyones post on here. I can see that everyone is collectively struggling at the moment and i think we need to utilize this community for more than just sharing our sadness. Nothing is wrong with venting of course but i feel like there isnt enough positive energy here to encourage everyone to keep going. I know asking for reassure feels like a must sometimes and trust me everyone has asked for it, it was a heavy compulsion of mine. But reassure is not what you need. It will make it worse everyone please trust me. Instead of letting out mind win we must support each other, understand our struggles but also share out wins. I feel like we dont use this community enough for finding friendship among us or spreading enough happiness. OCD Is not a happy disorder but seeing that everyone here is just here either hating on someone, people being too afraid to ask for help or no one reading peoples post. This place isnt just for our negative thoughts and events to fester we need to support each other here too! Ask for help, comment on peoples post with love everyone is struggling. In this community we should help pull each other out from dark places not let them stay there. I hope everyone who is going through it right has a better night/day/afternoon. You’re loved deeply your not a monster, your not evil, your not dirty, your not a heretic your Nothing your thoughts tell you are. Peace to you🤍🤍🤍🤍

I don’t have much of a support system outside of my bf, so I find myself here a lot. I think I just need to vent, so forgive me if I do this too often. It helps to have a community of people who truly understand. I haven’t felt this debilitated by mental illness in months. There has to be some explanation, maybe it’s hormonal, because I feel like I’ve completely lost myself. The panic hits in waves, sudden and overwhelming, like my head is submerged in lava, burning and suffocating. Then, for a brief moment, I feel almost normal and wonder what all the fear was about. But it never lasts. The chaos always comes back. I even considered going to the ER because I’m not sure I can trust myself anymore. Something has to be wrong, because this isn’t me. My life isn’t perfect, but it’s not unbearable either. Since I withdrew from school, I’ve been so much less stressed that even my cycle, which has been irregular for years, has somehow regulated itself. But even with that, I feel like a failure. I was one semester away from finishing, so close, but OCD hit me harder than it ever has. It felt like drowning, gasping for air, reaching for something solid, only to be dragged under again and again. Now, I feel like that again, but worse. I feel hollow, like something is wrong with me at my core. I don’t just feel sad; I feel broken. I break down into uncontrollable sobs every few hours, and I don’t even know why. I just know that whatever is happening, OCD is taking full advantage of how vulnerable I feel. Is this what MDD feels like? Everyone tells me I have it, and it’s been confirmed by my psych, my pcp, and my therapist, but I still can’t seem to fully see it. I don’t know how to separate what’s OCD from what might be another disorder. I’m sorry to anyone also going through such a hard time, my heart goes out to you 🤍

Finding this app has helped me a lot in feeling like I'm not isolated and I've definitely met so many kind and helpful people here. You guys have helped me on my darkest days. However, because of my fragile state of mind, I think scrolling on here is becoming a compulsion and I feel like I end up triggering myself more by scrolling through some posts. I think it just ends up adding more to my intrusive thoughts and more ammo for my false memories and POCD to latch on to. And I know exposures are good for treating OCD, but this level of exposure seems to be doing more harm than good. So I will try to be less active (maybe I won't, who knows lol).