hey guys, anyone with eating disorders or body dysmorphia? ive had certain habits for a long, long time but ive started seeing them through a different light now. i usually try and starve myself to stay unbloated and skinny looking, and usually after a while i get so hungry that i binge eat. after the binge is over, i either drink excessive amounts of coffee (to work like laxatives) or i starve for days on end to “make up” for it. in all honesty, i would just throw up if it wasnt for a surreal fear of vomiting (only way emetophobia has been good for me ever) about half of the time i feel good about my looks, weight, body, face and all that, but the rest of the time i feel like i look disgusting, and thats where the starving comes in, and excessive grooming habits to cover my flaws. all of this was way worse a couple of years ago, and then it got way better, but along with all of this ocd this has gotten worse again. i feel like the way the “eating disorder” habits and the “body dysmorphia” plays out kind of look like an ocd cycle (sorry for self diagnosing, i dont know if i actually have these) another thing that i know for sure is very unhealthy is the amount of shame and embarrassment i have towards my body. i feel i “have” to do so many things to cover up, prevent or get ready for certain events or plans. overall, any time i need to be proper or any bodypart of mine has a role in something, i get so stressed to the point of panic attacks. i nearly had a burnout when i was seeing this guy for two months (my first time dating someone) from just sheer stress. before meeting up with him i would panic for hours, and still would while being with him. i barely got to enjoy the good times.

"Pure" OCD

MentalOCD

Date posted: 6y

Wow that sounds really tough. You're pretty close to being on the mark about OCD and body dysmorphia being related - in fact, it's mentioned a lot under the OCD portion of the DSM-V and is not only a differential diagnosis, but also highly comorbiditous with OCD. It's almost like a kind of OCD really. When you've got something this severe, I would suggest finding professional help :) they'll be able to find what to start working on first.

anna banana

Date posted: 6y

i am working with a therapist already, as ive already been diagnosed

anna banana

Date posted: 6y

but i was never tested for eating disorders because at the time, it didnt feel like a problem at all

anna banana

Date posted: 6y

mainly because my life has just been a constant source of stress, i dont feel when im stressed from other things. you know? i wouldnt know when and where the stress is coming from, so i havent realised that the whole eating habit thing and being so worried and using so much of my energy on how i appear is actually highly destructive

MentalOCD

Date posted: 6y

Yea sometimes other anxiety disorders can flare up. Do you live with someone else, or have a significant other?

anna banana

Date posted: 6y

im 17 so i live at home with my family

Mahx

Date posted: 6y

im not officially diagnosed about body dysmorphia but before i stopped caring because of the severe ocd and depression, my main obsessions were my looks. the amount of time i spent in the mirror trying to make the perfect face. i would remember exact comments about my looks. the most recents obsessions were about my body type and size and i needed to picture the perfect body in my head. now i stopped caring because i blocked it out and im not taking care of me. i havent looked in the mirror for months.

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