- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Here is the article - It's helped me a lot, man, especial lt the comment section. --- My OCD got horribly bad last year due to my memory of something that did happen when I was a teenager (I am 32 now), then my compulsions and anxiety got so bad that my OCD threw into my mind many other things I had completely forgotten, then false memories and at the end POCD. I was about to quit for good this life too. I had to go to an intensive outpatient program. All if my stuff is mixed with personal trauma with my childhood, which made it much harder. I did tons of ERP with "worry scripts", I also process some of the events with the therapist. All of that helped with the panic attacks but I was still feeling shitty. It was until recently that I heard Dr. Phillipson talk about how most people with PureO also deal with perfectionistic personality. I started looking into it and I found some amazing books on perfectionism which has helped me move on. Particularly susceptible to these obsessions are people who grew up super religious and/or with very demanding environments. You need to come to terms that may be you have made a mistake - possibly. Who knows. And that's o.k. Nothing to be celebrated of course but you are a human and you are always doing the best you can according to your knowledge and circumstances. especially when we are kids we do a lot of stupid stuff.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
thank you so much for sharing, you are definitely a wise and strong human❤️
- Date posted
- 5y ago
yep i’ve had false memories. one in particular (my first one) was a couple months ago on christmas break. is was that i m*lested my cousin. long story short i got a religious counselor who (i didn’t know i had ocd) tried to “brainwash” me and everything. i ended up having to tell my grandma that i thought i had molested my cousin and i excessively prayed (i’ve never been religious), couldn’t sleep, coudnt stop crying, and tried to kill myself. i got over it with help from my therapist and realizing it was my ocd and false memory. i’m still recovering from it (i’m 14) . i obsess over the number 4 (how old he was), the number 5 (how old he is now), the number 3 (how old his brother was), couches, being around him. it’s all hard. accepting that they’re all false memories or real memories is the first step in the long journey of recovery.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
try and accept the uncertainty. live life as if they didn’t exist because they most likely haven’t. write it down. talk to a therapist.
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- 5y ago
Have you read the OCD article by Stacey on Real Event OCD?
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- 5y ago
I go through the same :(
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thank you for sharing your story Scorpio I appreciate the help and I’m sending you good vibes as you recover.
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- 5y ago
thank you, and you too! you will make it through this i promise
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I do talk to my CBT about these issues and she says just do the same as with other themes. Thanks for responding. Is this something you have suffered with Scorpio?
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- 5y ago
FernandoV I haven’t read the article what is her name I will look it up
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- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Fernando thank you so much for opening up about this it is amazing. I feel like I am moving past what I did when I was a young child but there are somethings from my late teens and early twenties that I still struggle with but I try to tell myself that even then we are still growing and making a lot of mistakes (28 now). Some of the things did happen and I have confessed them to people and sought forgiveness and others are things I can’t remember if they happened or not and they feel like false memory ocd, no exact memories just thought that if true make me feel awful. I would love to talk to you more sometime you are such a strong person for making it through this and I would love to know more about the perfectionism articles and books you have read. I came from a family that made me feel inferior to my older sibilants and to friends so this resonates with me so much. If you have discord I am trying to start a support group on there my id is Zander#3940 and if please shoot me a text if you can my number is 8458503484. Email is zander1717@gmail.com this community is amazing and is seriously helping me so incredibly much. You are amazing!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 10w ago
Any advice? I just got triggered by false memory OCD. There is no indicator or memory of me doing anything bad, only the what if. So how can I deal with uncertainty because if I did do the false memory it would go against my morals?? Not something extremely unforgivable just like not ideal and against my morals… I don’t know if it happened. I have no memory of my false memory happen only the “what if” which is enough to scare me FOR CONTEXT: I was in the mental hospital when I was 16, and made a few friends. Some just a grade below me, so 14-15. I remember bringing up in convo someone I met previously at the mental hospital earlier in that year a different time I was hospitalized , to which a boy responded he knew her, and they did (seggsual) stuff at their school. The girl I was talking about at that time was 14. So im assuming the boy was 14 as well. 13 and up is together in the hospital, so he couldn’t be younger than 13. I have no memories of him flirting with me or me flirting with him. Or anything bad happening. Literally just “what if”.. or what if he wasn’t 14 but 13 and u said something inappropriate or flirted with him. I will never be able to know what happened and I’m sick thinking about this. 13 and 16 is NOT WITHIN MY MORALS. I am worried because the only inappropriate I guess convo had is when he was telling me what happened between him and that girl I knew. I also remember him having a bulge down there and it freaked me out and made me feel weird at the time because I noticed it. (At this time I was already diagnosed with OCD and experienced POCD) I try to tell myself maybe maybe not. But the what if it did happen makes me feel like a p33do, and me thinking it didn’t happen doesn’t satisfy me because I don’t have 100 percent certainty
- Date posted
- 10w ago
im going to be vague here, but basically i did something in the past that i regret and it became a huge point of my OCD but i have talked to my therapist and i have mostly moved past it. i watched a video by an OCD youtuber that really put it into perspective. anyway, i have been with minimal worry for a few days, but now im having worries related to i think false memory? basically it’s like “oh but what if i said/ did this and just forgot that means i harmed this person im a bad person”. to me it sounds like textbook OCD but im just wondering if anyone else has experienced false memory / real event at the same time. i have a really horrible memory which is making it even more stressful. any responses are appreciated!
- Date posted
- 8w ago
Hello all, I’ve dealt with various OCD themes and compulsions for pretty much as long as I can remember. In some periods of my life the thoughts and compulsions have been particularly severe, but I’ve also had years where I’m able to keep it under control. This has made me worry I don’t actually have OCD, especially because I haven’t been doing consistent therapy and my therapists have gone back and forth on whether I have OCD. In the past few years, I’ve struggled immensely with false memory ocd, and right now I’m going through probably the most severe episode of my life. I love my boyfriend with all my heart. A few times that I’ve gone out drinking I’ve had the thought before “what if I lost control and cheated tonight” and it’s bothered me severely. Two times before, it’s gotten to the point of convincing myself that because I talked to a man that meant I had cheated on my boyfriend and just couldn’t remember. It has never turned out to be true. About a month ago, I went out with friends and had too much to drink. I was really ashamed of myself the next morning, particularly because I always try to drink cautiously now that I know it can trigger my anxiety. I am ashamed to admit I do not remember the very end of the night getting in my uber and going home. I woke up anxious and extremely worried and immediately started off by worrying if I could have tried to kiss my friend and not remembered. I called him and was immediately reassured nothing had happened, I simply drank too much and went home at the end of the night. I started feeling better, but then remembered a moment I had been in the bathroom. I remembered chatting with people in line about how long the line was, and then being in the bathroom on my phone. I then felt like I remembered people knocking and saying to myself “that wasn’t that long” and leaving. There is nothing concrete that I remember that in any way indicates I cheated, and in fact I have texts with my boyfriend from the whole night telling him I loved him. My friend told me that the only time I was ever apart from him was about 5 minutes and that when he came back I was in the same exact spot he left me in. However, when I remembered being in the bathroom, I thought to myself “what if you cheated on him in the bathroom”/ “oh my god did you cheat on him in the bathroom” and then a series of images of me performing sexual acts popped into my head. I’ve poured over my memory and truly do not remember meeting anyone, talking to anyone, or even finding anyone attractive that night, but the fact that I was drinking makes me worried I’m just forgetting and these images could be real. I’ve been constantly ruminating on these fears for the past month, to the point that the only relief I feel is when I’m able to fall asleep. I’m a law student and it’s becoming extremely difficult to keep up with my classes. I’ve been google searching, asked chat gpt for advice, confessed my fears to my boyfriend, asked for reassurance from pretty much everyone in my life, and even emailed the bar asking for security footage (which I know all sounds insane). I’m a naturally guilty person and feel bad about small things, so I really don’t think I would be capable of cheating and then nonchalantly texting my boyfriend, but these images feel so real that it’s terrifying. I’ve also seen a lot about how I would “just know” and that begins to scare me because then I think “you do just know, you did it” even though I really don’t think I did. I know these posts are not supposed to be for reassurance seeking, I’m just so exhausted and feeling really depressed. I’m wondering if anyone has experienced something similar and has any advice. I’m also wondering if images can feel more real the more you ruminate on them or if it’s a sign of memory. Thank you so much for listening.
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