I feel like me and my best friend and ending for many reasons but when I talk to her about it she says it’s really all in my head and she doesn’t feel it at all. What is going on??
You are experiencing OCD. What really should have confirmed it for you was that your friend said, "no I don't feel our friendship is ending" and then you went "but what if she's wrong?" This is relationship OCD where the relationship is a friend.
@Anonymous Thank you. This is really helpful. I am not diagnosed with ocd but I have done so much research and I really feel like I have it but I feel like I can’t talk to professionals and get help. So thank you for helping me
Basically that’s the ocd cycle. You have a doubt. Your spend hours doing compulsions trying to figure out the real answer (including reassurance seeking from your friend for confirmation that you’re okay), and even if you temporarily feel reassured, the doubt returns and it repeats. Continuing to try to answer this with 100% certainty will only keep this cycle going and each time make you MORE uncertain ultimately. Not less. The reassurance will lose its effectiveness and you’ll need more and more. Break the cycle! Answer this doubting with “maybe it’s going to end, but maybe not. I don’t need to know with any more certainty than I already have.”
@pureolife Thank you. I have noticed that. I do everything in my power to make people give me the reassurence I want when it’s not humanly possible to completely make me feel okay about it.
@Alice_3 Yup! No ones answers, no matter how many times they repeat them, will ever stop the doubt. You have to stop the cycle.
@pureolife Okay thank you I will try to break the cycle !
I'm struggling really hard with relationship obsessions. Do I really love my partner? How can I know? Am I really just faking it? That kind of thing. It's making my life and relationship a lot harder than they need to be. I could use a few helpful coping mechanisms, trying to move away from less helpful ones like chasing reassurance.
i feel like i hate my friend and that i want to stop being friends with her. it feels like i desire it or get relief when i think about unfriending everyone. it makes me feel awful because this came out of nowhere and i have no reasoning for this because they’re all really nice to me. there’s not any red flags or anything. it feels like i want to send a message ending the friendships i have and i don’t know what to do.. everytime i talk to them now i get reminded of all of this and feel so guilty. i don’t even know if this is ocd or not because i haven’t even been diagnosed. idk what to do :( it hurts even more because when i think about if i would regret it, i don’t think i would..
Lately, I’ve been feeling extremely confused and guilty. My boyfriend has been really busy with exams, and we haven’t talked much this past week. I don’t really feel like I miss him, and that scares me. It makes me think maybe I don’t love him anymore, maybe I’ve changed, and maybe this relationship doesn’t feel right for me anymore. A few days ago, a friend invited me to go to a club with her and another girl. I know that if I went without my boyfriend, he would feel bad — not because he’s controlling, but because in our relationship, we’ve always had mutual boundaries and respect. I decided not to go, but ever since, I’ve been spiraling. My thoughts keep going: “What if I didn’t go just because of him?”, “What if I actually wanted to go, but I stopped myself because I don’t really love him?”, “What if I’m holding myself back and this relationship is limiting me?” All of this makes me think I’m bored, that I don’t like him anymore, or that I’m staying out of habit. It’s hard to tell what I really want or whether these thoughts are part of ROCD or some deeper truth. I keep wondering if I’m just attached to him because he’s my first boyfriend and we’ve been together for so long. Sometimes I even think I wouldn’t care if we broke up, and that I don’t feel anything for him anymore — and that absolutely destroys me, because he’s such a good person who truly loves me. He doesn’t deserve to be treated with so much doubt and coldness. I feel miserable. I don’t know what’s real and what’s just obsession. It hurts that I can’t feel any clarity or peace. I just want to know if this is ROCD or if I’m in denial and refusing to accept the truth
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