It’s baaaaaack....just looking for some support. It’s been a pretty good run for the past few months, and that has been nice. It never really goes away, but it just gets to a low level and the anxiety wanes too. But, I know this disorder cycles and for me it is back. It hit last weekend, and now the anxiety has increased as have the urgency of the intrusive thoughts. I have been here many many many times before and I know it always passes, but when you feel terrible there can be this urgency to making it go away now, and to also wonder why it gets worse from time to time. I know that I just have to feel the feelings and wait for it to calm down, but as we all know it can be hard on our mind when it returns. So, just seeing if others experience these ups and downs. And, just had to write about the hard feelings. Thanks all!

Thank you sooooo very much for your response. It is incredibly wonderful to connect to people who have been there, and know what it is like to be in the throes of a spike. You are right that it is not easy, but it will be ok. It always passes, always!

Thank you Daffodil! A big hug back to you too. I can totally relate with your comment about that this is real this time - it’s so wild how OCD can do that in our minds. And, we all know nothing has changed other than increased anxiety and the fact that the thoughts increase in intensity when that anxiety increases. One would think that knowledge would take us out of the spiral, but it doesn’t all the time. Sometimes we just have to ride it out and do our best all the while keeping faith it will get better. All the best to you!!

Been there! I have great days or weeks followed by what feels like total regression. The ups and downs are hard and it can be hard to even enjoy the ups knowing a down is around the corner. I’m sorry your OCD is acting up again. But it also sounds like you’re very self aware of the cycle and what you have to do. It won’t be easy, but you’ve got this!

The way you've described that Is so similar it's almost as if I've written it! It's great you have the understanding of your disorder to kind of predict the recovery . I recently experienced a relapse and I've had to come home. I struggle with false memories and each time I relapse and im like "no this is different this is real" each time I'm convinced I'll never get better even though I do. A big hug from someone who gets it we can do this.

You hang in there! One day at a time my friend. It will get better!