- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey. Had this happen to me too. It's in the past tho. Why spend time worrying about somthing you think you might have done but don't remember. Head up you got this
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- 5y
Thanks but it scares me because she’s like my bestfriend and I don’t want to be lesbian or bi and have done it
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- 5y
VERY good point Reptarrox, I’ve thought this very same thing. Accepting uncertainty about things you may have done seems to the only way to move forward past anxiety filled ruminating.
- Date posted
- 5y
Even if you did, so what? Firstly, your friend doesn't have to know. Secondly, there's nothing terrible in being attracted to women - unless you're homophobic, in which case the biggest problem would be you shaming yourself. That doesn't mean you can't still be friends with this girl though. And finally, had you masturbated on your friends picture, you would remember. That's seems wildly out of character for you so it's not something you'd forget or even do in the first place. Your OCD is just making stuff up and lying to you.
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- 5y
I know I just feel like I’m in denial
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- 5y
@cloudqueen "I did [something] and don't remember it bc my brain blocked it out somehow" Is a classic OCD tactic to make you doubt yourself. But ask yourself, EVEN IF you m-ed to the pic, what are the consequences? You're the only one who knows. There's nothing shameful about it. Could it be that you're catastrophising the consequences here? In any case, you didn't do anything bad. Be kind to yourself and good luck.
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- 5y
Are you familiar with sexual orientation OCD? Because that’s what this person is dealing with. It has nothing to do with homophobia. Please educate yourself on different types of OCD before passing judgement on people, please!
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- 5y
@ginac I said that if even if op was lesbian/bi, which seems to be the fear, the worst possible consequence would be self-shaming, nothing more. Can you tell me where exactly did I express judgement?
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- 5y
@ginac To be clear, by "shaming yourself" I meant internalized feeling of shame, NOT shaming yourself in the eyes of other people. I thought it was clear from the context bc I'm not judging anyone here. If it was unclear - my bad, English isn't my native language.
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- 5y
@obsessively_obsessive I’m scared it is internalised homophobia and scared that I’ve known all my life or something
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- 5y
@ginac Yeah I’m scared because I’m still a virgin and I haven’t seen a penis yet and I find girls bodies pretty and I’m scared that means I am
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- 5y
@cloudqueen And also I get like a happy response and a gronial response when I yhink about a girls body and then I go full panic mode
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- 5y
I don’t understand? I wasn’t passing judgment at all. I just merely meant that with my OCD I struggle with the strange concept of worrying about things that I wonder “did that really happen, or was it just a made up thought”. It’s been through my own personal research that leads me to believe that this mental process I just mentioned seems to be present in multiple forms of OCD and I think through this understanding the OCD community as a whole may be able to unravel the mysteries and potential solutions of this disorder. I simply believe knowledge is power. I view everybody on this forum as my friends in the struggle. I just wanted to set things straight. Thank you.
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- 5y
I didn't think you were being judgemental at all...
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- 5y
I wasn’t responding to your comment.
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- 5y
Thanks Reptarrox, I didn’t think I was either. Thanks for that.
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- 5y
Ohh ok. My apologies.
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- 5y
That's how it works. It's gunna tell you you might have done all this you could have this or that, or it's your fault. But it's up to you if you let it tell you so. You think you did something wrong but your worried. You know that's not how you see your friend. But that's also where it makes you question everything. But your not your thoughts. there's a future ahead for you to be better and be happy.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
I’ve been dealing with a lot of anxiety and uncertainty I think I’m really struggling right now. I was in my alone time (self pleasure) and obviously like whenever you’re doing your thing you might have fantasies or whatever and that’s what came into my mind in the moment and then all of a sudden I get a flashback from a scene from pretty little liars came into my mind where Emily kisses Ali on the neck. In pilot actor who played Allison was 12 years old, which the pilot was the first episode I believe but in the rest of the season of season one she was 13 and that flashback was in season one as well after the pilot and I’m really worried that I might have self pleasure to myself to that scene even though I knew all this time that she was 13 in that scene and I don’t feel comfortable because I’m 16 and even though like it’s not too much of an age gap it’s still polished me and I’m scared to death right now, but I didn’t panic immediately because I think I somewhat kinda knew in the moment that I probably didn’t do anything bad but I am not 100% sure and then the more I thought about it, I started to panic even more and now I’m panicking even more now and I feel like a really big pedo, and I keep searching and googling and trying to check for her age to see how old she was in that scene and I’m pretty sure she was 13 but I promise I wasn’t intentionally thinking oh yeah I’m gonna self pressure myself to this scene regardlessof her age. No, I’m just afraid I probably did without even like realizing or registering the thought in my mind, but then at the same time I kind of feel like maybe I was just coexisting with a thought and now I’m scared I’m really scared guys.
- Date posted
- 18w
Hey guys recently I been facing anxiety because I have a fear that I acted on something I know I didn't do but it feels real because it felt like I had attraction and arousal to a younger photo of a ex gf I feel so weird feel so anxious I need help Idk what to do
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- Date posted
- 17w
Hey guys I'm 17 years old I had experience with OCD I looked trans pornography and femboy stuff I'm straight I didn't jerk off to it I was really only looking at it in the past I have but for some reason I just felt like looking at it and when I did I did experience arousal not only that while I had a boner I simultaneously was thinking of memories and bad actions I had in 4th grade with another boy I myself not a homosexual I was a kid I did something with another boy I regret it I had that thought in my head lingering there in my head but I noticed pre ejaculation and now I feel anxiety because now it feels like I was intrigued by the thought it feels like it is it was probably to the video visual stimulus but it's hard I didn't jerk off to it at all I was really just looking idk what to do it feels like I did experience it to the video but also my thoughts say to the thought idk what to do can someone shed light on this
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