It makes me feel so much better about myself knowing other people go through this as well. I’m so so fucking scared of my own thoughts and I hate it so much. I don’t want to be a bad person and I wish these thoughts could get out of my head once and for all. Thank you for making me feel understood.

How did the thoughts get less constant 0823? I’ve had this constant repeat today of “you’re attracted to kids” over and over again to the point of I’m like what even is sexual attraction? And just feeling anxious and numb when my younger cousin was visiting. Sorry to ramble. I find it hard to let go of the compulsions

anonk, id be curious to know too. i’m terrified of that and is also one of my obsessions. you’re not alone.

I started dealing with pocd about 6 months ago and it really hit me out of no where and I had off and on panic attacks for a few days until I finally researched and found out it was ocd. I started doing exposures and acceptance therapy and now when a thought comes I can let it go so much easier, though it still scares me sometimes. I watched a video that talked about how ocd was like a lens that changed your perspective and you’re objective should be to step out of that lens and stay out of it. When a thought comes, I let it be there and I try my best not to react to it. It’s definitely hard and it’s scary but it’s really worth it. I’m no where near recovered though, I haven’t even been to a therapist about it yet because I’ve been too scared. Remember that your theme does not matter, I think we get caught up in the theme a lot. Fear of pedophilia feels the same as fear of contamination, but I know it comes with a lot more shame and disgust. I still get the same amount of anxiety when I think about a pill causing me to go crazy though. The goal isn’t to get rid of the thoughts it’s to react to them differently. So when I get a thought and I don’t react to it, I feel so much stronger than the OCD. Just know that it is possible to recover, find your hope and what makes you want to be better so when you feel weak you have something to look to. Mine is to be able to spend time around my family without anxiety and to be able to eat the same foods they eat and to be a good aunt to my niece. I also see my niece almost everyday and that is really good exposure. When it first started I wouldn’t even be around here, I’d stay in my room the whole time. But now I can actually play with her again and just let the thoughts go because I know it’s ocd. It’s really about putting in the work and doing exposures and acceptance therapy, I know it sucks but, once you start it, you’re just like wow I can’t believe how much better I’m doing. I really hope this helps and I’m sorry it’s so long! If you have any other questions or techniques you wanna share please feel free! I’m not a specialist or anything, either, I just know this stuff works for me. Also, be compassionate with yourself! You’re growing and learning and OCD isn’t your fault.

Thank you so much, I appreciate all that was said. It is definitely overwhelmingly shameful and scary. Every time I have a thought related to it I do everything in my power to change what’s floating around in my mind. I’m also too ashamed to talk to a therapist about it, but now that i know other people go through it too, I’m more confident.

Thank you 0823. How do you tackle letting the thought sit in ERP? It’s feels disgusting and abhorrent and I don’t enjoy it, but I almost feel like I “want” the thought to continue? The anxiety may go down but then I think oh well this must be me I must be agreeing with this.

I know it’s hard and I still struggle with that. You really just have to choose confidence over certainty. I always choose to believe it’s OCD even if I’m doubting it, even if I don’t fully believe it’s all going to be okay I just choose to believe it. It’s kind of like fake it til you make it. I think I just got to the point where the anxiety was going to be high either way, and I was going to doubt myself either way, so I might as well be trying ERP and trying to get better because I’ll suffer either way. At least with the ERP, there’s hope. I think it’s easier to do it at certain times too, like pick a time for the exposure to do everyday and do it for a certain amount of time like half an hour-hour. You just have to resist the urge to question it, when you think you must like it because you’re feeling anxiety, just let that thought be there like all other intrusive thoughts. It’s all doubt and fear. The way to fight that is with confidence. It’s like if a person was coming up to you calling you names, you just gotta be like “I’m confident in who I am” and that’s what ocd is doing. And it’s normal to think you want the thought because if we didn’t doubt whether or not we wanted it, we wouldn’t have ocd. It does get easier over time. Believe in yourself, not the OCD. Separate yourself from the OCD because you’re different from OCD.

I really hope this is helping you. If you want more information there’s tons of social media influencers that talk about OCD. “Shannon Shy-OCD can be defeated” on Facebook is amazing. Ali Greymond on YouTube is super helpful too.

Super helpful. Thank you :)

No problem, I’m happy I could help :)

We’re all here for you and understand what you’re going through. I feel so blessed that I came across this app in an article I was reading about OCD recovery. You’re definitely not a bad person, your thoughts don’t mean anything and OCD does not define you. I know how scary pocd is and the thoughts are almost constant, but they have definitely gotten less intense for me and I know they will for you too. Stay strong ?

Thank you so much, you’re so kind.

You should be confident because this has nothing to do with you or who you are as a person. Next time you get the thought try to let it be there for 5 minutes because trying to change it, then up the time each week until it just goes away on its own along with the anxiety.

You can feel anxious, disgusted, uncomfortable, confused, angry, and anything else but that doesn’t make much of a difference because it is just a thought. It’s not good or bad, right or wrong, it’s not welcome or intrusive, it’s just a thought. The reason we have them more often than others is because of OCD and the way we react to them. Try something else if that’s too hard. Try labeling it as OCD, then say “it’s not me, it’s OCD”, then distract yourself with something mindful like art or a good movie or exercise, after a while you’ll be able to label the thoughts as OCD easier. This is the 4 steps approach and it helped me a bit when my thoughts were really bad. I’d get the thought, my anxiety would rise, I’d remind myself that it’s OCD and not me, and then distract myself with something and the anxiety would go down. There’s a lot of controversy about this approach, but I think it’s a little easier than ERP when the anxiety is too high.

I relate to that^^

But I hate thinking about it, it’s disgusting!:(