- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I could be wrong but it sounds like you have moral scrupulosity OCD (which are intrusive thoughts where you feel like a bad person or that you're screwing up/doing something wrong) mixed with some form of harm OCD where you have thoughts of self harm. I don't have thoughts of causing myself pain or anything, but I do have similar thoughts because of guilt or stress. Sometimes I have thoughts that it would be better if I wasn't around, or that dying would be a fitting punishment (even though I can't really logically name what I would be "punished" for)
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I’m going through this everyday and am struggling to stay alive. Any tips?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@alittleapple Unfortunately no. I really wish I could give you some tips but the only thing that keeps me here most days is that I know it would hurt some people I care about. Maybe therapy and medication could help you if you have that option
- Date posted
- 3y ago
The way you describe it is The way you describe it is exactly what it's like, it's just about thinking I'm doing something wrong. Glad to know I'm not completely alone in this. I think it's probably a similar problem to yours, regardless of what the thoughts are they come from guilt of doing something wrong even if it's minor/forgiven/not true, or needing to rid stress immediately
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@JohnDoe21 I’m Christian so that’s sort of the only thing and my family as well. But it is really hard. We are not alone though
- Date posted
- 3y ago
you can definitely obsess about self harm - that's a big one for me. I felt really validated reading "Harm OCD" by John Hershfield (I'm actually about to read it again lol)
- Date posted
- 3y ago
That last question was rhetorical by the way. I don't know if it is yet but I haven't addressed it yet becasue I'm pretty ashamed of it. Just want to know if there's anyone like me
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y ago
thank you for opening up and sharing this part of yourself. it is a challenge to open up about self harm and thoughts of it. i'll give you a small piece of advice, don't focus so much on what the OCD subtype might be. focus on the compulsions. which in this case, does sound like self harm. how is self harming going to solve your obsessions? how about instead of immediately wanting to harm yourself when you do something you feel is "wrong" or "bad" - try sitting with the anxious thoughts. how painful and vulnerable would it make you feel to actually feel your anxiety instead of trying to solve your way out of it? also, i do not know if you are seeking therapy through the app, but i highly recommend it or seeking therapy outside of the app for self harm. you do not need to punish yourself for your obsessions.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w ago
I am really struggling with harm ocd. ( The fear of hurting others) My ocd is very tough to combat at the minute. I feel like i’m having intrusive thoughts every minute of every single day. Except from when Im distracted. I feel guilty and foul for the thoughts. I have this strong intrusive feeling that feels impulsive, as if i’m about to act on a thought. It almost feels like I want to. But I really don’t and i’m so scared this isn’t normal. I keep thinking. “What if this isn’t OCD” “What if i did that” and it’s really worrying me as it feels relentless and as if I’m about to do it. In my head chest wrists. I feel tired of this. I don’t know much about compulsions etc but i find myself - Asking my bf if he gets intrusive thoughts like me. Asking him if he actually does and asking repeatedly. - I ask him over and over again and check if he definitely does. - I will literally try to fight the thoughts by kind of saying “ as if i’m not that type of person” Then saying everything will be okay to myself. Please can someone tell me if this is normal. Yes I may be looking for reassurance but i need to know if it is, Im scared, i’m crying. Please tell me if you’ve had this feeling of as if you’re about to do it!
- Date posted
- 25w ago
I remembered something I did a couple of months ago that has changed me completely from trusting myself it was a conversation I had with my cousin and something they said unrelated made me remember this happening, I went into a full blown identity crisis i couldn’t walk out of my room or get out of my bed for months paranoid and scared of everything I’m still scared and feel like I don’t even deserve to shower I’m working on it slowly each day but I knew I had to get a therapist and I was diagnosed with ocd because of this event I remembered, and I just don’t know what to do…. I read online that it doesn’t matter how little or bad the event is it’s still ocd regardless when diagnosed but I know I have a compulsion to see others real events and it is nothing compared to mine which I shouldn’t compare but it’s difficult because no matter what I have to come to terms that it’s undeniably bad legally and morally what I did and it’s just so confusing how it’s something I JUST learned about months ago I’m literally in my mid 20s, and I went years without even realizing how troubled my childhood was and yes my real event happened during that time but I was still a teen and old enough to know better but I didn’t understand the magnitude of what I did at the time still no excuse though, this is where I don’t know what To do because 1. I already know what I did was awful and there’s no excuse for it 2. I can’t apologize in my situation that I don’t feel comfortable sharing specifics yet3. Yes I know I changed so much obviously I’m a grown adult now I know what’s appropriate and what’s not that’s why I’m so troubled over this and I never did anything like that again, I’m literally in the happiest relationship and seeing a therapist to also help me understand all this trauma, this event involved my cousin but even they are cool with me and very close as well hasn’t said anything I don’t know if they remember or not but it’s not something I can talk about with them at least not yet (again just don’t want to go in to specifics) but this is why is so confusing and has caused me to have intrusive thoughts about everything EVERYTHING the what ifs what if they remember what if I go to jail what if they hate me what if I’m denying who I have been and I’m this horrible person this whole time without even realizing and everything is a lie my relationship my joy for things what if I’m a ped, what if I can’t love or care what if I’m a person who just harms others manipulates I even spiraled thinking I was going to physically harm someone… it’s very bizarre to me because before my OCD my biggest anxiety was just having to learn how to drive…I’m in my 20s just to mention that again😭 I have probably almost all intrusive ocd categories, These thoughts never existed in my head until I remembered my event it has completely traumatized me but do I even deserve to feel better do I deserve to get help if I did something unforgivable do I move on or don’t? Should I even be living life I just feel guilty even breathing stepping outside I know for a fact if people knew they would never trust me they would feel like I probably should go to jail but do I go on to what others feel or myself? I know I wouldn’t harm anyone regardless of what my ocd tells me I never did anything like that again and wouldn’t but if it’s something that even legally I could be punished for does all of that not matter? I’m sorry I’m just trying to figure out what the right thing to do is , I’m continuing therapy and getting the help but obviously my therapist cannot say if I should be punished legally but even my boyfriend said that if I turned myself in they wouldn’t even take me seriously because I don’t even remember everything fully it was so long ago, but from what I do remember it’s still bad enough mainly just of me being a teen, I don’t want to make that event my identity but I just am so freaked out I feel awful what if I caused trauma to another person and all these years I didn’t even know, this event only happened once that I remember, there were things that happened to me as a child that would explain why it happened but it’s still not an excuse, I did a compulsion and googled what would it be called or the charges for it and the words that popped up triggered me to my core as anyone would feel if they were as stupid as me those words I googled are what monsters are so it’s hard not to think of myself as that it’s hard to not make that my identity if that IS what happened, is living with this guilt my punishment?I don’t want to give up on life I want to love and care and just love life I know this is complicated and a lot not much I can do but I’m just so lost.
- Date posted
- 25w ago
Does anyone have harm OCD related to recent events? Like events that just happened or happened not long ago? I feel like my OCD is trying to find something bad/immoral I could have done in nearly every situation that I am experiencing, for example “Did you just do that?”. And I constantly want to check, ask people for reassurance, try to find a logic answer by going it though in my head,… It’s many different themes but all related to doing sth bad/immoral (e.g., touching someone inappropriately, pushing someone in front of a vehicle, putting something in a drink/food). Does anyone have the same? Or the other thing that I experienced recently is that I did something (a rather unimportant action, not harming anyone) and I go over and over it and ask myself “why did you do that? What does that say about you? Are you actually a weird person?” It feels like I draw “false conclusions” from a real event… I don’t know if that’s OCD though or not. Just wondering if anyone has experienced the same. Good luck to you all! We’re not alone in this! 😊
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