- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel afraid to be at work or out of the house if he is home because I think he will do it. He says he only does it Occasionally. I asked how often. He said every 2 weeks or every month. He says he doesn’t keep track of it. Could he have agreed to this agreement because he didn’t really do it often to begin with? He said he did it more frequently before we met but still doesn’t know how often or if he has gone without it for months. He has lied to me about his sobriety & going to AA before. The truth eventually came out. I had a feeling about that too & I was right. I keep thinking that this issue I am fearing means I am right too. That maybe we are not compatible & we need to break up. 😞
- Date posted
- 3y
I do have an issue similar but also not the same? I more worry that I will end up accidentally m*sturbating and it will offend someone? (when I think logically this makes no sense)
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m sorry to hear your struggle. My obsessions are partner focused on what he does.
- Date posted
- 3y
@Stefanie86 I hope your situation is able to get better. Have a good day 💕
- Date posted
- 3y
Rather than going all the way to “maybe we need to break up”, I’m curious what would happen if you explored more about why you’re crushed. Why does your partner choosing to masturbate hurt you or your relationship? I grew up deeply in church and was told it was “wrong” or “adulterous”, but as I grew older I learned that it’s just another facet of human sexuality. It’s not great that he lied about it, but maybe he was embarrassed to talk about it? My partner and I have had to navigate masturbation while living together during COVID, and it was challenging but well worth it. Just my opinion! 💜
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you for this. ❤️
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
I’ve been feeling the urge to avoid intimacy or purposefully engage (for reassurance that I won’t give into a compulsion) because of intrusive thoughts and fear that I’ll “check/test” my reactions. My OCD is making me so scared that I’ll purposefully think of a child and try to see if I like it. It’s so complicated but I guess I’m mentally checking if I would mentally check during intimacy. I’ve even envisioned myself checking and it’s making me so nauseous. I know it’s a compulsion like any other but the sound of “touching yourself to the thought of a child” sounds atrocious and vile. I’m terrified I’ll automatically start checking next time I am being intimate. I truly feel so worried. If anyone has gone through something similar, I’d appreciate hearing your experience. Or if anyone has any advice?
- Harm OCD
- POCD
- Students with OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Older adults with OCD
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- Real Events OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- Date posted
- 22w
Does Rocd make it nearly impossible to forgive your partner for anything. Whether it is big or small? My situation is so gray area where there’s something my bf did that I feel like I’m not okay with but he did this when we were first dating (not bf and gf yet). I ruminate all day about it bc I don’t want to lose him and see a future with him and I know he loves me so purely. But I also feel like I’m going against my morals here bc I do feel betrayed by what he did. I try to forgive him by diminishing my feelings and telling myself “he never did anything physical with a girl or went out with another girl while we were together” but still feel so hurt that he even messaged another girl while us dating. He’s given me an explanation and has proved how much I can trust him so I’m just completely stuck on whether I should forgive something I know I would’ve never done to him or leave him even though the only thing he’s done wrong was before us becoming official. I’ve broken up with him countless times over this situation bc I feel like I “can’t live with it” but then immediately when we break up I want him back and I kind of understand his explanation and reasoning. I don’t know what is ocd and what is my real intuition anymore. I genuinely think it’s both. Are any of you guys in the same boat?
- Date posted
- 22w
I'm 18, and been in a relationship with my man for nearly 2 years. I started living with him around 2 months ago, and all I do is think about if he's cheating. We were long distance for a year and a half of our relationship, maybe seeing eachother once every month or two. I decided to move in with him, and ever since all I can think about is if he's cheating or watching porn. When he's in another room I think he's doing something wrong, I have to check on him every ten minutes to ease my anxiety. I didn't have this problem before moving in. Granted he has talked to some girls on his phone, even having his ex on his phone (didn't do anything bad) and he is porn addicted though he is getting better for me. It's gotten so bad I want to leave him. A couple days ago I broke up with him and it absolutely broke my heart, I couldn't bare it so I gave him a month to show me he can do better, and for me to work on myself. If I'm still unhappy with us I'm going to leave. I love this boy more than anything. I'm scared to be without him, this is my first real relationship. At this point I refuse to even sleep until he is sleeping. I don't want to start over, I don't want to leave him, but I really can't take this pain it's causing me. It's all I think about. I've convinced myself so many times that he's cheating, but I know he wouldn't. I question whether it's anxiety or intuition. Maybe I just know deep down he really is cheating and I just don't want to believe it. I don't know. I don't think he would do that, but at the same time he's really into women. I hate that he looks at other girls in a sexual way, it bothers me so much, and we talk about it often, but with it being an addiction it's difficult. He has gotten a lot better since we have talked about it. He understands I have an issue and is usually happy to talk about it over and over and promise me over and over that he's not cheating. He allows me to have his phone whenever I want and everything, I have no reason to think he's cheating, but I can't get over it. It's not fair to him either. How do I deal with this? How do I stop hurting so much?
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