- Username
- Stefanie86
- Date posted
- 2y ago
I feel afraid to be at work or out of the house if he is home because I think he will do it. He says he only does it Occasionally. I asked how often. He said every 2 weeks or every month. He says he doesn’t keep track of it. Could he have agreed to this agreement because he didn’t really do it often to begin with? He said he did it more frequently before we met but still doesn’t know how often or if he has gone without it for months. He has lied to me about his sobriety & going to AA before. The truth eventually came out. I had a feeling about that too & I was right. I keep thinking that this issue I am fearing means I am right too. That maybe we are not compatible & we need to break up. 😞
I do have an issue similar but also not the same? I more worry that I will end up accidentally m*sturbating and it will offend someone? (when I think logically this makes no sense)
I’m sorry to hear your struggle. My obsessions are partner focused on what he does.
@Stefanie86 I hope your situation is able to get better. Have a good day 💕
Rather than going all the way to “maybe we need to break up”, I’m curious what would happen if you explored more about why you’re crushed. Why does your partner choosing to masturbate hurt you or your relationship? I grew up deeply in church and was told it was “wrong” or “adulterous”, but as I grew older I learned that it’s just another facet of human sexuality. It’s not great that he lied about it, but maybe he was embarrassed to talk about it? My partner and I have had to navigate masturbation while living together during COVID, and it was challenging but well worth it. Just my opinion! 💜
Thank you for this. ❤️
So I've always had an issue about my partners watching porn. I've always felt super uncomfortable with it and just now realized that maybe it has to do with rocd... but then I fight myself on it because I feel like maybe it's just something that I strongly believe in. My current boyfriend thinks I'm crazy for not letting him watch porn. I then caught him watching porn once after he said he wouldn't and I freaked out. I felt really insecure. He said that he would stop doing it but I obsess over it and I check his phone when he's not looking. I also obsess over if he is talking to other girls. And then when I don't find anything, i tell myself that he has just gotten better at hiding stuff.
Has anyone else experienced a huge fear of being cheated on & then obsessing over if it is a gut feeling or that little voice in your head that comes along with OCD that just won’t shut up?? Something as simple as finding one of my in-laws shirts that has been used as a rag & covered in oil/ grease in my partners vehicle has sent me spiraling down a hole of “what if” it belongs to another girl, or a girl he’s slept with in the past? Did he cheat on me? Is he lying to me? Although I know the logical answer I still can’t stop asking for reassurance. He’s treated me well and there hasn’t been any indication of him even wanting to cheat. In return I just get mad at the reassurance because “what if” he is lying? I’m frustrated with myself and struggling. This is causing such a strain on my life and in my relationship. Any advice would help.
I have had bits of OCD and anxiety as long as I can remember but never in this way. I am in a 3+ year relationship with my now fiance. About 8-9 months ago I started heavily doubting our relationship.. doubting his love for and intentions with me and that we'd inevitably split up. That turned into me questioning my love for him. Questioning if my amount of sexual desire was "normal", if it's "normal" to find other men attractive if youre with the "right" one and that would go in and on. Then came the SO-OCD. These worries, fears, and doubts made me questioning EVER bit of my sexuality and that being the reason why I've felt a lack of contentment in my very healthy, stable, consistent relationship. I feel as though this is my body going full on protector mode!! I've had my share of trauma growing up and in adult relationships that have left me with tons of relational wounds and then pile on a lifetime of fantasizing about what it would be like to find "the one" (thanks Hollywood and social media lol). All of this to wonder if anyone can relate to all of this and how you've been working through layered traumas and OCD
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