- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel the same way. Having a very hard time with ERP. How can one sit with their obsession without distraction, compulsion or rumination?
- Date posted
- 3y
I don't know. I think ERP can be helpful, I am not encouraging anyone to quit their treatment. It's a simply this unrealistic level of mental and emotional discipline that accompany it that I find doubtful...
- Date posted
- 3y
I have felt this way at times too, sometimes wondering if my whole life is a compulsion.
- Date posted
- 3y
Mine too...I'm sorry that you're going through this
- Date posted
- 3y
Yikes. I don't see a nocd therapist, but I have been in therapy for a long time (though not currently). I would say focus on one thing at a time and try not to do everything at once.
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes I think that's the right thing to do. It's the worst part about OCD, the questioning about everything, so focusing on one thing at a time feel like a good idea
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I'm sorry to hear that. I haven't had that specific experience with my NOCD therapist. We discuss *specific* things to work on but I've never felt like she's told me that everything is potentially harmful. Is that literally what your therapist said or is this an interpretation your OCD is latching onto to discourage you from continuing treatment? It almost sounds like (at least based off of this post) that you're obsessing over the ERP itself.
- Date posted
- 3y
Ah no I am not talking about ERP. I don't see a NOCD therapist and I never did ERP (I have autism and possibly ADHD, and I am french so it would be complicated to use NOCD because my insurance doesnt work here and I need specific treatment). I was more refering to the articles that they send to my email, I'm at the point where ai am dreading the moment that they arrive because I think "Ok, what did I do wrong now ? What else should I watch out to ?" (And of course I don't dare to turn of the notifications because if I do then it'll be avoidance and I'd be a coward )
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@Kamisamahajimemashita1? Ahhh sorry I misunderstood! While I agree practicing avoidance would be bad, I do think you don't have to keep getting those emails if they are triggering. Like you don't want to flood yourself and do too much at once. Its ok to do things more slowly and make progress that way.
- Date posted
- 3y
@redmuse22 Yes that's what my mom told me as well...I suppose it is that I get overwhelmed very easily and I can't really recognize when something is too much for me or not, and I want so much to do the right things that sometimes it gets counterproductive... I am happy that it is working well with your therapist by the way, it didn't want to disprove ERP as a treatment, I'm sorry
- Date posted
- 3y
Maybe it would be helpful to just get exactly what you are supposed to do for ERP and then let the rest just be. Dont question it. So for example, my ERP phrase im supposed to say after an intrusive thought to not do rituals. Im supposed to repeat this over and over again until the anxiety is gone. Maybe JUST focus on your ERP phrase and repeating this. Dont question what else youre doing. Does that help?
- Date posted
- 3y
It helps a little, that is pretty good advice, maybe it would mean OCD won't have such a huge impact on my life where I think about it everytime I'm doing something... Luckily I'm pretty disciplined when it comes to keep myself from doing the compulsions...
- Date posted
- 3y
I get this because even my friends without ocd get stir crazy if they just sit there. Everyone I know does things to fill their day bc being idol makes them anxious. So are we not allowed to distract ourselves too? I am going through the same exact thing!
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes, sounds a bit like we're being punished right?
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
Guys for the past couple of hours ive been spiraling! I wad researching and came across this harm ocd article question that has been worrying me. The title was "im scared of hurting someone when I'm mad. Can i trust myself?" And I was thinking "hey that's what ive been worried about for the past several months!" I even AVOID being angry. Im scared of it bc I get a lot of thoughts and I'm hyperaware of my hands and feel them tingly! Last time i tensed so hard to stay still as possible bc I was so so nervous from my thoughts and my hand twitched which made me SPIRAL. I never want to cause harm! And i always start crying after an argument bc the thoughts are so so scary! Anyway I got afraid bc the article said "research has shown that people with ocd don't struggle with impulse control- so if you find yourself intensely worried you could do harm based on the intrusive thoughts or urges you have, it's likely something else is going on." THAT SENTENCE HAS LEFT ME WITH A TON OF ANXIETY! Its so bad, my appetite is gone! I'm scared does this mean I don't have ocd and should be seriously concerned?!
- Date posted
- 21w
It is not the thoughts or urges that scare me anymore. It is the way I feel like I’ve absorbed the compulsions into my identity :( I am doing them so automatically that it feels like I am choosing them freely and they’re me. and because of that, it feels like I AM the OCD now, not just someone with OCD. I think I’m just deeply trapped in a loop. I was trying to survive unbearable fear so I started scanning. Then I started pre-scanning. Then checking if I pre-scanned. Then I check how I feel during all that. I run to beat my OCD to the “punchline” (intrusive thought, urge, sensation) because I’m so scared all the time. So scared that I don’t even feel it anymore. I feel numb and all that’s left is this jittery residue and numbness. Now it’s all tangled together in a huge knot. I feel so extremely lost. I think this may just be meta OCD, but I’ve never ever felt so gone before :( I’m really scared.
- Real Events OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Religion & Spirituality OCD
- BIPOC with OCD
- Students with OCD
- POCD
- Harm OCD
- Date posted
- 14w
This is gonna be a long one: So a little over a month and a half ago, my OCD started to spiral again. I’ve had ups and downs with it in the past, my main themes often changing. When I was younger it as afraid I’d run away, in middle school it was germs. But as I got older I started having intrusive thoughts of the meaning of life, suicide, and dying, with those fears being my common themes now I’ve gotten a lot better since it started back up, but lately have been panicking because I’ve had intrusive thoughts that my methods of trying to heal are wrong. I’m 21, and for the last 3 years have lacked ambition and haven’t pursued my dreams or things I want to do. I just sleep, work, eat junk food, and play games or watch YouTube on my time off. Things I still love, but after years of living this way, I’ve hit a breaking point and want to start doing more with my life and the people in it Yet, almost EVERY new thing I’ve been trying to do or start, I’ve been having thoughts that they’re wrong or won’t help. Here’s some examples: I’ve started trying to eat a bit healthier, and my brain is telling me it’s not gonna fix me and I’m just avoiding food I like (junk I know makes me tired and sad). Then the moment I indulge in even one unhealthy food item, it tells me I’m failing at taking better care of myself and that junk food just numbs the feelings Same with video games. I tell myself it’s okay to play them as long as it’s not to avoid anything or they don’t take up my life like they have been. The second I do I feel guilty, say it’s cheap dopamine and hindering me from being productive and that I’m numbing my feelings again Same story for everything. Trying to walk and go outside more. Head tells me I’m avoiding being home because it makes me anxious. Then when I stay home it tells me I’m wasting time I could be spending outside or with people I love I’ll wanna spend time with my family or friends because I’ve been a hermit for years and miss spending time with them. When I try to, head tells me I can’t because then I’m avoiding the issues I have and seeking reassurance, and that I need to learn to tolerate this alone. But then when I stay home too long, I get anxious and sad because it does make me happy being around them even if I’m not seeking reassurance, and they genuinely do help me feel better (for example I saw my grandparents last night and talked about my feelings and desire to actually go out and live life, and they helped me understand uncertainty is part of life and I should do things I want anyways and even helped come up with things I may like to try doing. Now my brain tells me it’s bad to get help or open up about my pain) I’ll have racing thoughts in my head and I’ll be arguing with myself over rather it’s better to face them head on, ignore them, or let them run their course. It feels like no matter what I do, I’m feeling guilty and shame for it. As if any attempt at feeling pleasure or doing something that makes me happy is “avoiding the problem”, like I HAVE to focus on my intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and sadness 24/7 otherwise I’m “avoiding/burying it again” I know not to avoid these things and it’s best to confront them (if they’re real problems I have like relationship issues and insecurities and loneliness) and learn to tolerate the anxiety and uncertainty of life and OCD, but my attempts at “helping myself” are quite literally what I feel is currently keeping me so miserable. They’re sucking whatever joy I have in life out, telling me it’s bad, and that I have to feel this way all the time so I can “learn to tolerate it” I’m just so scared of doing all of this wrong, and I think my OCD I knows that and is currently using that to toy with me. I want to be healthier and happier, but then I feel guilt and fear for not being healthy 24/7 and indulging in not healthy things like video games and the occasional junk food. Anybody else ever felt this way?
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