sense of self

does anyone else feel like they’ve completely lost themself and don’t know what they really feel like or who they are anymore. i have no idea what i should have as morals or if i even care about anything, i’m really stuck, i don’t even know my sexuality anymore, it’s really tough.

im beginning to doubt my own memories and fundamental things about myself :\ every time i make a claim it's like my brain gets a little foggy and i start questioning it. for example i might narrate an event, or state a fact about something or someone, and question whether that really is true or happened. and when i get that thought it's like my brain goes blank and i don't know how to get back on track. i constantly feel like a liar. i also had a phase where i excessively doubted my identity and personality. every time i expressed a strong opinion or emotion, or made a statement about who i am as a person i got an unwanted thought that said "is this really who you are" and my mind would go blank again. id also feel anxious and hopeless. i compensate for this by taking personality tests on the internet to reassure myself that im secure in my identity and have an actual personality, but it can also be triggering sometimes because when im unsure about something i start feeling like i have no identity again ;( this is stupid i know

I think I realized (probably too late) that I’m scared of losing myself to one of these themes. I’m not sure if it’s like this for everyone but sometimes when I have intrusive thoughts it slowly erodes my own sense of self. Intrusive thoughts become so muddied and virtually indistinguishable from my own. I have this idea of myself that all of my intrusive thoughts go entirely against, and I’m afraid I won’t be me anymore. I am trying to practice more self love, and more self care in general. I’m trying here. To gain a self esteem, to not be in control but to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.