Deleted post.

You’re not alone. If everything’s overwhelming for you today and you’re struggling to see the wood for the trees. Just know at the very least you’re not the only person going through this. I know that doesn’t change what you’re going through but it does mean that there’s nothing wrong or incurable about your situation. I’m having an awful week too and feel so shit but I know I’ll have a good day soon and it’s so worth waiting for. Look after yourself at the moment and don’t believe everything your brain is telling you.

You’re worried that you’re a pedophile. So much so, that you don’t even want to say it! I don’t know if you’ve ever read othello, but OCD is like Iago. In the end of that story, Othello murders his faithful wife because he was convinced she had cheated on him due to how Iago played on his insecurities and deceived him into thinking so. Iago would point Othello to little coincidences and interactions between Desdemona and Cassio that (to someone insecure) could be mistaken for evidence of an affair. Don’t underestimate how capable ocd is of twisting you into a knot with your own insecurities. The solution is to not engage with your insecurities, and to ask God for the strength and endurance to get through this. If Othello had ignored Iago and approached his deceptions with logic and a healthy amount scepticism, he would not have killed Desdemona. Don’t engage with ocd or it will kill your peace and joy. *Especially* if you’re someone who’s diagnosed with ocd. All the best to you, you’ll be in my Prayers.