Not looking for any crazy reassurance here but once you start “not engaging”with thoughts, is it common for them to pound you all day still? Do you just keep not engaging all day long for however long it lasts?
Yea. Initially, it’s very difficult. Those thoughts also start coming in the dreams a lot since they are not being addressed in the waking life, our brain tries to send the “danger/warning” in the dreams. But if you keep brushing them off, the brain eventually learns that perhaps it’s not that important and finds something else :D
@Youarenotyourthoughts I’ve been all day ! It’s throwing everything and anything at me. Does this last for a while?
@Santo123# Yes it will be like that for a while
Hey! I get thoughts no matter what sometimes. Every day is different. The best advice I was given was to just let them "hang out." Like an obnoxious sibling or a neighbor's annoying dog barking non-stop. The thoughts will keep coming, but not giving them an emotional response and almost embracing their presence like, "yeah ok it's annoying you're here but you can hang out" will help ease the internal tension you are feeling. For me, this is the only thing that works. Accepting that they are there and moving on with my day and doing something that makes me happy. Hope this helps!
@Gandalf144 If you don’t mind me asking how do you stop the voice? Like I feel like mine is so automatic it just engages with itself all day long. I just keep saying “not engaging “ but it doesn’t stop talking (if that makes sense).
@Santo123# - Yes that makes sense! There's no way to stop the voice unfortunately. Saying "not engaging" is still engaging. Because you and I have OCD the voice and thoughts will keep coming no matter what. The only thing we can control is our response to the thoughts. Mine is automatic as well, especially when I am doing exposures. Just have to let the voice and thoughts "be" there. Embracing being uncomfortable and continuing on with your day. Try doing something that makes you really happy while allowing the thoughts to be there.
@Santo123# - If you keep allowing the thoughts to be there, your brain will start noticing it's not important, like they said above! The thoughts will eventually be as important as a lampshade in your house (example of something in the background we don't tend to notice or find important). You have to consistently let them hang out in the background though for the thoughts to start becoming unimportant to your brain. The point is to not get rid of them but let them be there without any engagement. Not even saying "not engaging" because that is still providing them attention
@Gandalf144 Thank you ! I did exposures today and that’s what set it off. Just constant chatter but I appreciate your good advice
@Santo123# - You're doing great! Writing it out helped remind me as well how to use those tools when it gets hard.
@Gandalf144 So just let it talk to itself all day? Just want to make sure it’s not a compulsion
I find this so hard because when I try to stop avoidance/compulsions I get the worse anxiety and it’s like my intrusive thoughts get ‘angry’ I know that might sound strange lol but I feel like I’m being attacked!! mine are of sexual nature and really distressing and when it happens it feels like it’s me repeating them constantly in my head. How do you even know if it’s you keep replaying it in your head as a compulsion or if it’s the process of getting better???
@Liv24 That’s exactly where I’m at ! I’m trying not to pay attention to it but it just keeps going. So how do you know if you’re actually leaving it alone or not?
@Santo123# A hard isn’t it!!!!! Everything I read it says just ‘let the thoughts be’ we’ll by letting them be feels like I’m interacting with them and then if I try to carry on doing what I’m doing they automatically start replying in my head over and over and I don’t know if it’s me or not😭
@Liv24 Exactly ugh !
@Santo123# I’m my own worst nightmare because I’m anxious when the thoughts are there then if they go away for a few mins I automatically bring them back it’s like I want to torment myself and keep reminding myself there still there wow
@Liv24 It’s been hard the last like week and a half for me. Just super anxious and uneasy, thoughts come and go and I’m trying so hard to just chill and let them be. Sometimes I feel like I’m over preparing for them to come so I can deal with it all better idk.
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If I stop seeking reassurance will the thoughts become less?
I have really started to take control of my compulsions and im starting to string together better days! Still not great days or even good, but they are better!!! I have controlled my outward compulsions (googling, research, reassurance, checking) the past couple of days and felt the positive impact of that. But unfortunately, I am realizing that the rumination is still constant. My sexuality and relationship are the only two things constantly on my brain, and if they aren’t I freak out and wonder why im not thinking about them! Anyone have any advice on how to deal with the rumination. Sometimes I don’t even notice im doing it, but it’s taking up 90% of my day. Once I start to tackle this I think I may make some real big progress! Hope everyone is fighting today! ❤️
I’ve had physical compulsions on and off throughout my life. And rumination while not physical comes right along with it. Recently my brain has latched on to reassurance seeking. And it makes work horrible. I constantly feel the need to seek reassurance or validation from my boss or my coworkers or friends. I feel constantly judged and hyper analyze everything someone says to me or every interaction I have. I go home after work and run over all the times I spoke to or interacted with someone that day and I’m critical of how I presented myself, how I was perceived, what I said or didn’t say. I then go back the next day not only wanting to seek reassurance but also thinking I need to over explain myself to prevent any kind of damaging misunderstanding or miscommunication that would make them think poorly of me. Is this a common thing? It’s been the worst thing to go through as of late, my checking and things has gone down but this mental stuff is a whole new beast. How do you guys handle this kind of thing at work or at school?
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