- Date posted
- 47w
Normal?
Is it normal in OCD to test yourself to see if you like something (POCD specifically) Sometimes I imagine scenarios or things to see if I have a reaction to them but then feel guilty about imagining it afterwardsβ¦
Is it normal in OCD to test yourself to see if you like something (POCD specifically) Sometimes I imagine scenarios or things to see if I have a reaction to them but then feel guilty about imagining it afterwardsβ¦
it's a compulsion to reassure yourself, and in the end will do more harm than good and make the feelings/thoughts worse. Do your best to put it a stop to your compulsions when you recognize what is happening. Remember ocd will make you believe the worst things that aren't true. You are okay and not alone. So many people experience exactly what you are dealing with.
testing myself used to be one of my biggest compulsions, like where I would try to prove things to myself so the fear would go away but it always came back..
Very normal, itβs a compulsion to find relief from your OCD but speaking from experience, compulsive checking works until it doesnβt. OCD adapts to try to keep you stuck and what used to give you relief will eventually cause you more anxiety.
I litterly do this to I have to visually look at a younger person in my mind to see if im attracted to them its so bad when I don't feel anything I feel relief then I don't fet thoughts intrusive thoughts and I feel good but then I have to go back and make sure again if I don't feel anything
I feel like if I don't think about it I feel like I've accepted it and I'm actually I feel like I'm attracted do I have to ince again visually look and imagine a younger person in my mind to see if I really feel anything
Then I have to do a compulsion like I have to touch something or go back and do something if I dont I feel like something bad is gonna happen to me the next day I feel like I might get cussed out or yelled at which I know isn't a big deal but for me it is beacuse I hate being screamed at or making mistakes I think that gas to do with childhood trama but it gives me anxiety and stress when I don't go back and do the compulsion beacuse my brain is like oh your a p word you didn't go back to touch the wall you didn't turn the lights off and on in a specific order and way it's just exhausting
Iβve been feeling the urge to avoid intimacy or purposefully engage (for reassurance that I wonβt give into a compulsion) because of intrusive thoughts and fear that Iβll βcheck/testβ my reactions. My OCD is making me so scared that Iβll purposefully think of a child and try to see if I like it. Itβs so complicated but I guess Iβm mentally checking if I would mentally check during intimacy. Iβve even envisioned myself checking and itβs making me so nauseous. I know itβs a compulsion like any other but the sound of βtouching yourself to the thought of a childβ sounds atrocious and vile. Iβm terrified Iβll automatically start checking next time I am being intimate. I truly feel so worried. If anyone has gone through something similar, Iβd appreciate hearing your experience. Or if anyone has any advice?
Am I the only one who experiences this, or is it more common than I think? Sometimes, I find myself imagining what a coupleβs sex life might look like, or what a personβs body might be like. I think itβs driven by curiosity, and I focus on it for a few seconds. When it comes to family members, teenagers, or anyone I feel uncomfortable imagining in this way, I used to be able to shake it off as an intrusive thought. But lately, I canβt seem to let go of it anymore. Iβve become used to the anxiety, but Iβm stuck questioning what this means about me, especially since Iβve taken time to think about it. This is really stressing me out because I feel like a pervert. Iβm hoping that this is something more common than I realize and that OCD is just distorting something. I feel like I really need some insight here. Any advice?
I am 15 years old and my POCD feels like its not POCD, i feel like i like my intrusive thoughts, but i have more intrusive thoughts about having intrusive thoughts, and i feel like i cant enjoy the things i normally enjoy anymore, like calling with my girlfriend and joking with her because this is still in the back of my mind, its making me question morals and if i ever even viewed P as completely wrong and i hate this so much, i love my nieces and nephews and when they're over i know id never do anything with my intrusive thoughts but when they arent present i feel like i like my thoughts. Before this i was dealing with HOCD and ROCD and i wish i could go back to that
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