- Username
- anonk
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I actually didn’t do erp...I waited it out ? took a year! But with ocd it is always false attraction. I don’t have ocd about feeling attracted to my boyfriend, I just am and feel no anxiety about my sexual feelings towards him. The possibility of being lesbian brought me immense worry and feeling as though I actually wanted to have sex with a woman constantly, which brought me even more anxiety and confusion, and depression. But i learned if I was obsessing about it? It wasn’t true about me. It’s a psychological term for impulses that are not truly part of your real personhood...ego dystonic I believe?
Gosh why can I give other people advice but it’s so hard for me to do it everyday
It is difficult. I’ve given lots of advice but because my thoughts can be graphic and specific I do wonder ‘could part of me like or be capable of doing this unnatural act?’. It’s very difficult. I just gotta keep going I guess and trust my brain will eventually rewire to remove this curse.
Yes this happened to where whenever I would look at a woman and get groinal response I needed and wanted to get off even though I wasn’t attracted to women at all. It passed and I no longer get groinal responses, only to men, like usual :)
Thanks Dianaaa I’ve had groinal response before but never had the feeling I had last night to get off. It scared me so much and I’ve been crying off and on.
What made you realise it was false attraction? How often did you do ERP?
Ocd sufferers are very hard on ourselves aren’t we? I guess we can have compassion for others but hard to do that for ourselves
I did. That was my compulsion for an entire year. I would feel false attraction to women and then need to get off to make it go away.
Thank you for your response :)
No problem! It helped me to realize all obsessions are ego dystonic with ocd, 100% of the time. Not trying to reassure just a helpful reminder of the real truth!
How do I know it was a groinal response vs arousal ?
I like this “Just because it is sexual in context, we may immediately experience arousal. When we see, hear, touch, taste or imagine something that is simply sexual in nature, our brain may send out a message to your genitals to get all fired up. And like it or not, then they do. Our brain might not wait to consult with our true values and preferences before sending this message. The brains just sends the message on through. This is true for everyone, not just those with OCD.”
Thank you. I’m just so scared doing ERP will “condition” me into believing I’m actually attracted and my orientation will change. I’m so so scared anyone else feel the same?
I haven’t started erp yet. I’m on a waiting list to see a therapist. I’m scared too. But I’m around kids everyday. I’m a pediatric nurse. I have intrusive thoughts all the time but I try to remember that I have my values and those are what I choose to practice, everyday. My darn Christian values because it is what I hold dear. You can have ocd thoughts and your own values. Don’t let ocd try to tell you differently. You are the commander of the ship :)
Same Halespineapple18! I can empathise with how people are feeling and give advice but it’s so so hard to do it myself!!!
I’m the same Soniclen
Good days and bad days Anonk. At the moment I’m having a good day but the triggers swim around in the back of my mind. Just gotta keep plugging on. Hales you may get better quicker than you know. You’re practising exposure everyday.
Hey guys, POCD trigger. Have been diagnosed with pocd. Help needed. Having s massive panic attack. Woke up early and out of no where came an intrusive thought of a naked kid. As much as it caused me disgust and to have a tight chest anxiety etc it seemed like I enjoyed the thought? Like I couldn’t deny I enjoyed the image? Do not want to act on it and went to markets this morning and saw kids and got intrusive thoughts but thought oh that’s just OCD however these thoughts really upset me and now I feel like a non offending pedo in denial. Like I read some pedos can feel disgust too and I’m just freaking out. My therapist said thoughts don’t mean action but I wonder if I have secret desires and I can’t live like this. Has anyone else felt the same? Can an OCD thought seem “enjoyable?” And like you “like” the thought?
POCD TW I was scrolling through Instagram and saw a picture of a little girl and suddenly I had the urge to kiss or touch her or something it scared me a lot and I started scrolling faster to get away from it BUT I felt a groinal response and it felt SO real like butterflies and twitching and itching and everything maybe even vaginal lubrication and I had the urge to masterbate and scrolled back to make sure I don’t desire this and I felt calmer when I didn’t feel anything looking at her again but I still feel anxious and kinda aroused during the day thinking back to the situation I don’t know what to do it feels so real the urges and everything ?
Ok so I’ve been kind of upset about this all day so I figured I would share this. I’m really nervous doing it because I don’t want to get judged for it. I feel so guilty about it all the time. So a couple of years ago I was babysitting a family friends kid, and they were crawling all over me, jumping up and down, and I wound up having a groinal response (I really don’t wanna say the kind.) I kind of put it in the back of my mind and forgot about it, but around last year I remembered and latched onto it and it threw me into my OCD spiral. I remembered this happened maybe two other times before that, and of course I felt weird and guilty by it. I didn’t experience any sexual arousal, yet this happened to me. I always had sexually intrusive thoughts ever since I was a little kid, so perhaps I was just having a groinal response to when that was happening because I was thinking “omg what if...” or whatever, but of course I can’t remember my thoughts. Now I know what a groinal response is and that they come in all shapes and sizes (lol) but because this happened *before* I realized I had POCD, my brain has convinced me that it was some kind of genuine attraction and that I wanted to do something bad
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