I need to vent. I am really trying my hardest to not give in to my compulsions but it’s very hard. I was doing good just a few days ago. Now I’m back to square one. I’m not feeling well, I feel emotionally and mentally sick. My distress is so real. For these past few months I haven’t even been sleeping correctly. I go to bed at like 2/3 am. 😭 and That’s not like me. It’s just so crazy how this has affected my life. No I’m currently not in therapy, but if I’m being honest, with the current climate we are in, I’m not interested in phone therapy. I need to be in a nice calm room, talking to someone face to face. The environment is very important to me. And as far as meds, I can’t get them without being prescribed them first. the fact that’s it practically December and I literally saw myself struggle with this the entire year & no improvement to my life makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. I wouldn’t wish this mental disorder on my worst enemy.

Totally hard to adjust. I can’t wait for all of this to be over as well. Thank you for your support🤍🤍

Right! Like I definitely do not want my family to hear what I have to say! They don’t even know about my OCD I embarrassed to tell them. Quarantine has made everything worst mentally for sure, I’m gonna have to find ways to help myself because the phone therapy can’t even be an option for me.

Thank you for that. I always try to tell myself to take it one day at a time, because if not I’ll start worrying about the next few days and I’ll lose it from there. What else do you recommend for insomnia? Because seriously I hate being up at night not doing anything besides worrying. Sleep is like my only time off lol

@nowsheindistress Sure thing! It might be long, srry I’ve tried a lot of different things , so YMMV. If you want supplements, valerian root is safe. Ofc supplements aren’t the first measure, but this one is noticeably calming and safer than the way people will use, say, weed to calm down. Try making a “resting” vs “sleeping” zone in your place. I realized that when I couldn’t sleep and wouldn’t get up from bed, I was starting to associate bed with pressure + stress. So now, I either use my couch, or rest with my head at the FOOT of my bed to chill first. These are zones where I can relax, but there’s no pressure to fall asleep. Once I’m almost sleep there, THEN I go to my actual bed. I know this sounds like a ritual but I’ve done it without it being an obsession. I find I can adapt it as needed to different places. I know intrusive thoughts are probably the root of losing sleep. Buy a journal and write all that stuff out. You can schedule 15 minutes to just write. The worries will still probably be there, but their weight will reduce. Also, consider avoiding tech for maybe for an hour before bed. Not because of the light, but because it’s easy to go down a rabbit hole online. If you read a book in that hour instead, it’s a lot less engaging and energetic than tech. TLDR: rest zone vs sleep zone, journal thoughts, no tech before bed, valerian root Remember you can’t force yourself to sleep (I wish). And you can’t control thoughts. But you can control making your environment encourage calming down.

@rootytooty Thank you so much for this !!! Definitely going to be trying some of these things !!

You are right, while I am against it, it could be a postive outlet for me. I just feel like I wouldn’t be listened to as much as I would be if the therapy were face to face, but idk. I’ll look into it. I’m glad to hear that you are doing well though and that phone therapy has helped ! 🤍🤍