- Date posted
- 2y
Keeping it to yourself?
Part of my OCD is that I can’t share my intrusive thoughts and compulsions with anyone. I can’t say it out loud because then that makes it more true? OCD is weird like that.
Part of my OCD is that I can’t share my intrusive thoughts and compulsions with anyone. I can’t say it out loud because then that makes it more true? OCD is weird like that.
I struggled with this a lot, very early in my ERP journey, and sometimes now. It took me awhile to share my thoughts with my significant other, and my friends. Ultimately for me, I realized I could handle speaking my fears out loud. It also helped me to tap into my support system outside of my therapist. It did feel weird for me too, but if you want to work towards getting past this fear, you can do it ❤️ give yourself grace as you do
trust me, not saying it out loud just gives it more power. It’s literally voldemort complex LOL. Ok that sounds silly and I literally just came up with it rn but it actually makes sense. Like not saying the thing out loud gives it this dark looming energy that scares you and builds up until you’re positive saying it will end in disaster, but when you finally do just SAY the fucking thing, you can see it’s just a weird looking clammy bald dude who never wears shoes and doesn’t have a nose. Let it out mama. It’ll feel so much better and give you back your power <3
@athoughtisjustathought wow it’s going to be so funny if you have never seen Harry Potter that will literally make no sense to u I’m sorry
@athoughtisjustathought When I’m ruminating, or caught in a fear, I try to laugh it off. It reminds me of the boggart scenes, where the boggart is something very scary, then the wizard/witch shouts “Ridikkulus,” and it lessens the fear.
Basically I just mean that not saying things makes them a lot more scary and usually when u just say it out loud ur like “wait a minute that’s a silly thing to think” so yeah. Sending you love!!! ❤️❤️❤️
I feel that exact way, I feel awful about wanting to say my intrusive thoughts out loud. It seems so real which is why it’s so scary but it isn’t. You can take as much time as you need to, but saying it out loud is definitely beneficial.
I've been struggling with ocd since I was 7. I'm 18 now and it feels like the older I've gotten the worse it's gotten. I don't know how to deal with it and i feel so lost and alone. Its hard for me to even say what my intrusive thoughts are or to even fully acknowledge it to myself in my head because im scared that if i put it out in the world itll be true or if i acknowledge the thought it solidifies it and makes it true. i feel like im just over exaggerating what im feeling and im turning something that isnt there into something bigger which makes it hard to talk about it with other people. Especially because im not diagnosed but I know it's ocd but what if it isnt? What if im lying to myself or I'm just doing it to get attention and I don't realize it? I just try to deal with it on my own but it's so hard and feels impossible. I feel like ocd has contaminated every part of my life that I enjoy. The things that used to bring me comfort are now filled with things that trigger my ocd and bring me anxiety.
I can’t help but feel so anxious because of guilt. I feel guilty about not sharing everything about my OCD to my partner, but because I understand that confession itself is a compulsion and would not help anyone. I feel so anxious too that if all my fears come true and she finds out, then it would be so devastating for everyone especially her. Does anyone feel the same thing? How could I change my perspective on this?
Does anyone feel the urge to confess secrets even though they’re not yours to share? My husband told me about a traumatic event he had and trusts me to keep the secret. It has NOTHING to do with me at all. And my brain is making me feel like I need or want to tell someone. I want to be trustworthy and my brain is making me feel like I’m not because of this obsession. It’s so confusing because I know I don’t need to but I feel like I “want to” because of the OCD anxiety? And the feeling of wanting to makes me feel more anxious and like a terrible person. I have confessed literally everything to my mom about my thoughts so she’s my safe person. And I had an emotionally abusive dad (probably how I got OCD at a young age - like 8 years old) that has now passed away. So confiding in her even with intrusive thoughts and messed up shit was safe for me. Does my brain feel like I need to tell her just because she’s my safe person? I hate the feeling of me “wanting” to tell at all too and can’t tell if it’s real and it’s making me feel like a horrible person. I literally have no secrets myself. His mom knows and so do I. So I’m not the only one that knows. But why is my brain doing this? It’s spiraling me out and has been for a few days. But I want to keep the secret because it’s HIS and it doesn’t affect me in any way. I mean sure I feel bad for him - but it’s from his past before we even met? Someone please help me rationalize why I feel these things and why it’s so confusing to know if you actually “want” to do something or if it’s OCD? It’s causing a deep anxiety pit in my stomach and has been for days now.
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