Anyone else feel hopeless because they know they’ll never be able to afford proper therapy? It honestly scares me so much knowing that there’s no possible way I can get the help that I need.

I feel like it's got to a point that I just can't deal with stuff on my own anymore. I've tried to help myself with compulsions and thoughts and behaviours and it helps to an extent but I feel like I just need more help. But I don't even know where to start, I've felt so ignored in the past and I don't even know where you can turn to. I'm in the UK so it's difficult, especially considering I'm only 17, to get any help for this kind of thing. I just want someone to talk to, something to help – medication, maybe? I want to try it, I want to see if it would stop the overthinking for a while. Stuff isn't as bad as it has been before, but I feel like I can't just leave this anymore. I just don't know who to turn to or where to go from here.

I tried contacting NOCD, but they said that they didn't accept my insurance, and even if they did, I'd have to provide co-payment. I felt devastated because I'm afraid of going to a therapist who will misunderstand me. I can't afford therapy at the moment but I might be able to in a few months. Are there any alternatives for self therapy?

I can't stop thinking about ending my life. I feel like I'm not even living, I'm just surviving. Everyone is capable of being a person and functioning and I'm just stuck here avoiding everything. My psychiatrist said my ocd is severe and it will all take time and I'll start erp and I'm already on medication but I just feel so depressed and like I won't be able to handle erp and it's already too late for me. I feel inhuman, it's debilitating. My major theme is just fear or contamination, I can't even make myself a meal I can't touch anything in the kitchen. I get stuck in the shower for 2 hours and when I don't shower because I'm depressed I feel like a walking germ. My hands are a mess, my school work is shit, I avoid and avoid and I'm just so tired of "living" like this. My psychiatrist said they don't have any therapists available right now like.... excuse me? What do you mean u don't have any 😭 I honestly don't even know why I'm typing this becuase nothing helps, nothing ever will. I'm so deep into this I can't get out, my room looks like shit, I can't live in this body anymore, I really can't. I let everyone down, I am and will be such a dissapointment. I don't have any dreams or goals or passions I just wasn't made to be here. I don't know how or who to ask for help like there's nothing anyone can do, I'm already on meds. I can't keep being like this, seeing everyone judge me for acting insane.