Real Event struggles do end!

Hi everyone! I've seen (and made) so many posts about the negatives of real event ocd and how it traps us, but I haven't seen many about people who have found recovery, so I wanted to mention my story! Not going to go into details on my event because I want to avoid reassurance, but I will say I had some events that caused me a lot of turmoil. I was constantly talking to friends and family, seeking reassurance, posting online, googling, making confession after confession, revisiting related events I had never thought about before, debating if I was overreacting or if I was a bad person, the works. And this was over events of which the most recent was a year before. It was bad, I am ashamed to say it but it was to the point I didn't know if I could keep going on with life because OCD had me so fixated on my shortcomings. It wasn't as if I had faced some tragedy I could overcome, or someone had wronged me, it was my "own fault" in my view. I would start each day immediately consumed with guilt and wondering if I wasn't really the person I thought I was, make it through my day, and then go home, breakdown and cry. Like every day. I had struggled on and off with ERP for a very long time. I constantly doubted I had OCD, thought I was just looking for excuses, and never really fully committed. After a particularly bad episode, I decided enough was enough. I wanted to move on so I truly committed to ERP. Every day, even when I didn't want to or had excuses. And surprise surprise, it worked. It's been a couple months almost of just being happier. The ERP has become a part of my life now, I don't practice daily anymore because it comes up naturally during my day. Whenever I have a trigger now I just go right to "maybe maybe not" out of habit. And now I use it for so many things that used to give me anxiety. Did I embarrass myself at the night out? Eh maybe. Am I a bad person for not telling this person all of my horrible thoughts? I dunno whatever, doesn't matter. I get anxious still, but I don't dwell on these unanswerable questions anymore. Life is a lot better now. I can't say I'm a perfect person, but I'm not afraid to move on anymore. I wanted to mention this because specifically with real event, I know it can be hard to let go since you feel like you have evidence against yourself. I don't know if this is wrong, but I will say that now that I'm not in a constant state of anxiety, the events I was worried about seem soooo much smaller. Were they my best moments? No, but they're not the world ending choices I was making them out to be. Not to reassure, but I just want to emphasize how OCD can really get us stuck in our own heads and distort things so much. We catastrophize, but really we are some of the most compassionate people. I feel lucky in some small way to be a part of the community here. So yeah, just wanted to say that even if it seems like you're going to be stuck on something for years, it WILL get better! BUT YOU HAVE TO PUT THE WORK IN!!! Best of luck to y'all and I am here for whoever needs it ✨❤️

Real Events OCD

McDucko

Date posted: 1y ago

Yep. I have relapses each year and the only thing that gets me out is working within a well-rounded recovery routine centered around ERP. Healing is possible no matter how dark it seems. I thought my days were numbered or I'd have to live like this forever, but there truly is life after an episode. Makes me wonder how many people obsess over real events like I did and just feel they need to suffer through it.

Anonymous444444

Date posted: 1y ago

100%, it does come back but now I am so much better equipped to handle it, especially because I know I can get through it now. I wouldn't wish it on anyone though and I can't imagine being stuck without knowing how to work on it

Ella_ Rose

Date posted: 1y ago

Thank you so much for sharing your story here. I'm so glad that you're doing so much better now. It is an event to celebrate honestly cuz I know how difficult things get and trust me you should celebrate! I wish you good luck on your journey to full recovery. I pray that all of us people suffering out there find hope and compassion towards ourselves and others♡

Anonymous444444

Date posted: 1y ago

Thank you for the kind words!!

Phoe.nix

Date posted: 1y ago

I can’t thank you enough for sharing your story. I’m so proud of you and am so grateful that you would share this. I haven’t felt joy in over 4 months from real event/false memory and have a very similar story to you. Thank you endlessly for this

Anonymous444444

Date posted: 1y ago

It gets better I promise, I know it sounds cliche but really! Wishing you the best!

Phoe.nix

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous444444 You have no idea how much this means to me, thank you🙏🏼

Anonymously0CD

Date posted: 1y ago

Thank you. Real event OCD seems to really have ahold of my life. They’ve been causing me terrible distress for the last like 2-3 months. It’s like my brain broke and now I’m not sure how to be happy again. It’s all I think about on replay. All day everyday. I am in therapy and I am on medication. I struggle with knowing what a good, effective ERP would look like for real event. I was script writing but I’m not sure that’s helping. And I will be honest, I don’t do it a whole lot (which could be why). Do you have any recommendations on ERP that worked well for you with REocd?

Phoe.nix

Date posted: 1y ago

@TaylorR13 WOW friend I am going thru the exact same thing

Anonymous444444

Date posted: 1y ago

Hi! I struggled with this as well. Working with my therapist, what helped me wasn't so much writing scripts, but changing how I reacted to the thoughts. It was hard because for real event, it didn't feel like I had intrusive thoughts, but a breakthrough for me was when he helped me realize that for me those memories ARE the intrusive thoughts. It's not easy, but I would allow the memories to show up, and then have to just say "yeah that means I'm a bad person". Doesn't mean I'm agreeing with it, but just allowing it to go by. Tough at first, but once I really accepted that possibility I found peace. And to be honest after I moved on I realized it wasn't as bad as I was making it out to be anyways, because I was now viewing it from a practical state of mind. All that being said, easy exposures for me were TV and movies honestly! Stuff with situations that would trigger those memories. It was kind of fun in a way because I'd have the reward of a great show or movie if I let myself move on after the trigger! Not sure if this helps, kinda rambling, but hoping it does! Hang in there 🤞

Agent K

Date posted: 23w ago

Real Event Ocd

Hi there I talk about religion (but I'm not trying to force it down anyone's throat) So my main event (which is the one that truly bothers me) happened in 2015 when I was 14. I won't go into any details or anything. I will say that it got so bad once that I almost committed something detrimental to my health earlier this year. Not long after that I spoke to a doctor and basically confessed what's been happening to my brain and my mistakes, he mentioned things that really resonated with me, I'll paraphrase a bit: "Okay, so what you did was not good but it's not something to condemn yourself for. It falls into the grey area, you've apologized and have been forgiven (even though I apologized over text, which comes across cowardly)but it seems that you haven't forgiven yourself. There's a whole lot of difference between you at 14 and you at 23. Try to have some perspective." This really helped and it still does, but unfortunately ocd tries to find a way around this. I'll get a thought of "oh but you forgot to mention that other part of the event" and it magnifies it. Can anyone relate? I've done everything but fully move on because I sometimes feel like I don't deserve to move on. And I'm still worried over the future.

Rookeryend123

Date posted: 19w ago

Hi, I’m Matt!

Hey guys, I hope you’re well! My names Matt, and OCD has struck me again 😂 When I was 10 years old I had to attend therapy as I was having excessive intrusive thoughts. P.s. I didn’t even know this was possible at the age of 10! I then completely forgot about it, until 2.5 years ago when I started experiencing ROCD. I really couldn’t understand why I was feeling/thinking this way however, I soon after remembered my struggles as a child and then realised my OCD had returned. Also, my mum has serious OCD so I guess that could be why too. I had a a really hard battle with my emotions and mood due to this however, the last 1.5 years had been really good and I managed it well. I got married and had the best day of my life. 3 months ago, a thought about having an affair in my head appeared, and BOOM, it’s back again. I’m struggling a lot right now however, I’ve accepted that this could be a re occurring theme throughout my life, and it’s time to learn to deal with it again. I’m back on medication and have started ERP therapy, so hopefully it’s on the up from here. I’m not here to list off my triggers and thoughts as this would be me seeking reassurance however, I’m here to show that recovery is certainly possible!

Josh M

Date posted: 13w ago

Winners

Those of you who have overcome at least a bit, if not all, of your OCD. When you went through the CBT and ERP, did it feel like the end of the world? And how did you face the fact that your fears and uncertainties might actually come to life?

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Real Event struggles do end!

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