[Deleted]
- Date posted
- 1y
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
Not sure of your theme, mine is SOOCD/ROCD, and I feel you. It’s like you went from being sure and confident in who you were as a person (wants/desires/needs/etc) to someone who feels so unsure about who you are. Your mind is telling you that you want these things, even though you don’t think you do. It makes you feel guilty. And it all feels inevitable. It’s like - you feel like you have to do something that you really don’t want to. At least … that’s my horrible experience with this.
leagueplayerleagueplayer
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp 100% my experience too gp. I don’t know who I am anymore and when I say I know I’m straight, it feels like I’m telling a lie or i’m just trying to convince myself of something that’s not true. I feel so helpless sometimes
ctmontctmont
- Date posted
- 1y
I have definitely been where you’ve are. I’ve been married for ten years and we have 2 kids. I have had moments where I’ve slipped away to cry in the bathroom by myself because the thoughts have been so overwhelming. “You’re wasting his time. You’re not being true to yourself.” ERP is the only way to make the thoughts shut up. Just met with my therapist a few days ago after a recent lapse. Just tell yourself “ok, maybe that is what I want. Thanks for letting me know, OCD.” Try not to feed into the thoughts and fall down the rabbit hole. Grounding yourself in the present moment is also super helpful. Telling yourself “this will pass. I’m safe.”
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@ctmont Hi. Thank you so much for responding. When you first overcame your SOOCD, was it purely with ERP? How did you move past the “feeling that it’s true”? Did you just have to relentlessly accept the thoughts and how they made you feel, that they felt real and just power on with your life? Any tips for someone who is really struggling with being stuck at this feeling true/real that I fall over with ERP ?
ctmontctmont
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp That’s exactly what you do. To be honest, I have had lapses but you just need to trust your values and continue to tell yourself “thanks for the reminder, ocd but I’ve got this.” It’s not easy and at times it still feels impossible but the lapses are temporary.
Lucapup1!Lucapup1!
- Date posted
- 1y
It’s a horrible feeling. When I start to feel this way I practice gratitude in my head. Even for the smallest things. Like the roof over my head
Ditto Ditto
- Date posted
- 1y
Same
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violettag6
- Date posted
- 22w
Not doing great
TW I’m feeling really bad about myself today. I feel like a fraud and a liar. I’ve been unable to enjoy my time with my girlfriend because I’m bombarded with my thoughts. I’ve been asking for reassurance from so many people and nothing is helping. Nothing makes me feel better anymore and I’m worried that this is just how it’s going to be for forever. I miss when I could just be happy and not overthink so much. I miss being able to get through my days without this crippling anxiety. I’m worried there’s going to be a day where I realize I have no fight left in me
geodrimilis
- Date posted
- 15w
I’m sick and tired of this .
I just can’t do this shit anymore.im tired of these “arousal” sensations that feel real but when I go check my arousal to the same gender I just get anxiety. I’m tired of feeling like I can’t like girls anymore. I’m tired of my arousal getting blocked every now and then because I’m anxious. I’m tired of not knowing who I am anymore. I’m tired of having my mind putting me into an identity I never asked for. I’m tired of this life
nae nae
- Date posted
- 8w
Tired of feeling like a bad person
I genuinely can't help but feel irredeemable over every little mistake made or regret I've had. It's so up and down, but I just miss the certainty. Knowing "this is who I am." I'm so disconnected from myself. Like, I'm really, really trying. Today is really rough... I got triggered the other night, and it's been hell since. I've been fighting seeking reassurance. I want it so, so incredibly bad, but I know it won't help me :( Some days, I just don't want to be here. It's funny because yesterday I felt amazing until I got triggered. I just immediately spiraled after that. I don't know. Does it genuinely get better? Will therapy really help me? Sometimes, I think maybe this is the best it'll get, and that scares me. Sorry for the vent. I'm just feeling so overwhelmingly anxious right now. I can't even cry (due to Zoloft). It feels claustrophobic somehow, having all these emotions trapped inside of my body with nowhere to go 😭
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