justinisscared
- Date posted
- 1y
Lulu_20Lulu_20
- Date posted
- 1y
I struggle with contamination ocd too ans I struggle with showers, when I get up in the morning I will litterally feel my stomach drop in the most dreadful way, sometimes the night before I shower I will actually feel anxious about having to shower the next day. I have been stuck in the shower before for 4 hours in an episode so I understand how you are feeling. Something that is currently helping me is music. I will put uplifting, music on while I shower and I focus on singing the lyrics out loud, and focus on the lyrics and singing rather than saying “I’m washing my hands with soap or I’m shampooing my hair etc” over and over again. It also helps me to keep track of the time, so I usually do one thing for one song and try not to let myself go past that. So some songs are like 3 min long or 2 min, so it helps me to keep moving. I keep my playlist like 35 min long so I know that when the music is over it’s time to get out of the shower. Again I struggle and sometimes I’m in the shower for an hour and sometimes I can get out in 28 min it really depends on the stress level. But you aren’t alone, I feel the same way
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
That will work temporarily but you're still avoiding the root cause. You're brain will know you are distracting yourself to avoid germs. You can use music but make sure to use it as something you enjoy instead of as a tool to avoid or OCD will grow stronger.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
Tell yourself " maybe or maybe not there's no way to know" when you have a contamination thought pop up. React without judgement or emotions when confronting these thoughts. OCD can't survive without certainty which you can't actually provide. So living with uncertainty is the end goal. I wish there was a simpler way but ERP therapy definitely takes a mindset shift and courage. I started with the easiest obsessions first to build confidence. Then I tackled the hardest fears last.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
Use that script I gave you but I forgot to add that after you say " maybe or maybe not" you should go on to whatever you were doing before the OCD thought arose. Using mindfulness to stay present is important because if you stay focused on your thoughts it's very difficult to resist compulsions. My brain understood I was going back to my tasks because it's what I wanted to do and not because it was a distraction to avoid OCD.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
I've been there my friend. Are you seeing a therapist right now?
justinisscaredjustinisscared
- Date posted
- 1y
I'm in the middle of getting appointments with drs to try and figure out options since therapy is expensive where I am and can't afford it . I have had one dr appointment so far with another coming up this weekend
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@justinisscared It's easier with a therapist but after they teach you some strategies it's basically up to you. So give it 3-4 sessions to learn how to do ERP and if you can't afford any more then come here for advice or try other support systems.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@justinisscared Can you share what you're afraid of? You don't need to be too specific. I'll help you with a script. Are you afraid of hurting others or yourself from contamination? I ask this so you can figure out your root fear. That's what you need to address.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
For me my contamination fears stemmed from fear of being punished by God. My fear of going to hell was the root of my most tricky obsessions to fix.
KpikaKpika
- Date posted
- 1y
Mine is from fear of hurting others, especially my loved ones, can you help share some tips pls. Struggling everday to a point my hand skin is flaking and in pain.
StoicGuyStoicGuy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Kpika First try to build a mindset that OCD isn't helping you keep anyone safe, which it's actually not. You're reacting to the thoughts because the outcome is scary but you must realize they are just fabricated thoughts by OCD. Thoughts are just thoughts I constantly remind myself. I don't use this as reassurance though. It becomes difficult to perform ERP if we believe OCD is actually helpful instead of a life destroying disorder. Where contamination is concerned I limited myself to what normal people would do and only reacted to a supposed contamination if I could actually see it. For example, I wash my hands only once after using the restroom as this is a normal practice. I don't wash my hands again unless I touch something potentially dangerous I can actually see such as raw meat or blood. While you get those thoughts that pop up want to wash you refrain as long as possible using the script " I may contaminate someone but there's no way to know". The end goal is tolerate the uncertainty that it's possible to contaminate someone however unlikely. You could wash your hands a million times but can you actually guarantee that your hands are clean? Once I started reminding myself germs are everywhere and being okay with uncertainty then anxiety eventually fades away.
KpikaKpika
- Date posted
- 1y
@StoicGuy Thank you for the advice, i never thought from this point of view. I didnt realise i was seeking 'certainty' so much with my rituals which is never achievable. I guess im just so scared/afraid of uncertainty. I learned something new from you, thank you!❤
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oneday.x
- Date posted
- 22w
Just experienced most traumatic bathroom visit 😭🙏.
I'm keeping it light hearted but I really desperately need some help. Just to preface this is very tmi. I thought it was just gonna be a quick bathroom stuff. No! That would be silly of course, so number two decided to screw things up ROYALLY. And please bear with me because I am coping with humour 😭😭. So I went, but sometimes, tmi, I struggle to.... Get it all. Out. If you know what I mean. Which is pretty awful to the point I'm like genuinely praying. Because you can't clean up properly if you're not done. So I'm in the bathroom, trying, for over half an hour. And I finally give up pretty much and try and clean up. Oh no, that was a huge mistake. But what else could I do? It was so messy that I wanted to just get in the shower and be done with it. Onto the things I'm worrying about I guess. On the tp (tmi, I'm WARNING 😭😭) it was.... Messy, and there were very loose specks on the tp. Which is an issue, because I used wet wipes which needs to be binned and not flushed, so I have to carry the tp-wipe combo over to the bin, which means carrying it over where my legs are, and thus where my clothes also are. I hate it. I'm now paranoid specks fell into my underwear! Great! Love it. I'm also paranoid specks or just #2 in general went on my hand. And, believe me, with the state of things, it was POSSIBLE. So when I'm finally done and wash my hands, of course that isn't going to feel like enough. I have really short nails, so short they're painful, and I'm always terrified stuff gets under them. So, I use a nail brush while washing my hands. I also filed them down (which HURT) because I'm convinced that could get rid of anything underneath them. But it still doesn't feel enough. Because I have loose skin and hangnails around my nails, and I'm paranoid as well that stuff gets under dry skin. Not to mention my hands are so dry from washing that they're cracked and flaky and they peel, so I am worried that #2 or dirt gets under the flakes of skin. I know it sounds stupid, but I am so scared. Usually it feels irrational but it was such a state that I'm convinced there must be a speck of it on me somewhere. On my hands. And I'm terrified. I know I need to accept uncertainty but I'm struggling right now.
miss_anonymous
- Date posted
- 11w
Here we go again..
Hi guys I know I keep posting but I having real bad anxiety rn. My bathroom sink was plugged and my dad came and fixed it but he put the drain stopper on the top of my bathroom counter which got me frustrated. Mind you it was dirty water with like black particles on my COUNTER!!! I tried to keep my composure and told my dad that I appreciate him doing this and I know he has a way of doing things , but told him to not do that. He kinda got annoyed but I told him it really bothered me. He finally unclogged the drain and everything’s fine now. During him fixing it, I was there watching him closely n I watched as he put the drain stopper on top of my counter it got on the side of my gel that I use for my hair. Now I’m having false memory that the water splashed on my skin care products. Like what if the bacteria got inside my cleanser? I don’t even wanna wash my face. I thought about cloroxing each item but it seems like no matter how much I wash them, nothing helps and I keep wanted to buy more and more Clorox . I don’t wanna buy another cleanser bc 1.) it’s 11:23pm and 2.) it will make things worse. I’m scared but I’m gonna cleanse my face with it anyways . 😞 please any advice would help
GuiltyGrapes
- Date posted
- 10w
I feel so filthy
So Im staying at my uncles house until Saturday or Sunday and I feel like I’m filthy and making his house infected and idk what to do so when I first got here his house had grass I walked through to get to the door so I made sure to wipe my feet at the door and leave my shoes close to the door but I still feel,like I’m infecting his house he gave me and my little brother a room to sleep in and the first think I think of is how I need to wash the sheets when I leave. The first day was hard because I couldn’t shower and I felt so dirty because we had to go on a walk and I was sweating and we also had to water the grass outside and I had the same socks on as I did yesterday and I just felt like they were filthy and I was walking with those socks around the house so now his carpet is filthy and the bed I was laying in is now filthy. And I couldn’t shower because I didn’t have any cleaning supplies to clean it after I was done because I didn’t want to wash in their shower and now clean it afterwards. But I got someone at the store and took a shower and changed clothes and I felt weird about where to put my dirty clothes I hung them on the shower curtain rod but I feel like I just infected the rod. And afterwards I tried to spray off the shower with some Clorox foam cleaner but I feel like I didn’t clean it good and even feel bad about cleaning it because I was afraid the chemicals I tried rinsing off the shower and the bottles I was using in the shower but still feel like it’s infected. And don’t get me started on how I feel about the bags I’m keeping my clean clothes in and also the other bag I’m keeping my dirty clothes the bags are laying on the floor and I feel like my clean clothes are getting dirty from the floor and my dirty clothes are dirtying the floor and the towel I was using I used to dry the bathroom floor and asked where to put my towel he said on the dryer but there was stuff on it so I put it on a box above the dryer but I feel like I just infected everything and also Ik he touched the towel WHST if he gets THISE germs on his kids . Also the covers me and my little brother were using fell on the ground and his kids were playing in them and stuff like that but my little brother said it was fine and still used them but idk and his cover he brought touched my dirty clothes and the floor and he still used them and I just feel kinda ill about that. And today me feeling filthy just multiplied because I can’t SHOWER again today because someone’s toys are in the shower and idk how to get clean becuase we leave soon and idk what to do do I just change clothes? Idk about wipes because I can’t just ask for baby wipes and now I’m walking around with no socks because I only brought one pair and my others ones were put in my dirty clothes bag and now I have to go places no socks just in my flip flops. And last night I went to the restroom because I didn’t want to have an accident in the night because I’m always anxious about that stuff and I went but I feel like I just infected their toilet and I washed my hands after but I went back into bed but my feet touched the bathroom floor so now the bed is hay I feel actually infected and since I’m laying in it I’m infected too. Idk why I woke up so depressed and feel so filthy and guilty idk if it was the pose I was sleeping in or if I think I had an accident idk but we a lot of places to go today and idk what to do I was going to get Lysol at the store today to spray stuff but I don’t think I can get everything and I feel so sick he has kids what if I give them bad germs I can’t live with that
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