Engaging with thoughts

I honestly can’t tell when thoughts are being affected by OCD. Sometimes I think I have what I think are normal “grey” thoughts, but then OCD adds so much weight to them and I spiral. I had this thought that I wished my boyfriend was more confident or independent. I felt so guilty for thinking it. I told him, and of course it hurt him. He told me it’s a normal thought to have, I just dwell on it too much. And that it’s the kind of thought most people keep to themselves. That’s the thing. I don’t know what’s okay to keep to myself and what isn’t. I think sometimes I say things out loud not just to relieve anxiety, but because I genuinely don’t know what’s okay to think or say. I do not know the line between a normal grey thought and something that’s “bad” to think. I don’t know how to tell if it’s something I should process privately or something I need to be ashamed of. I get this confusion with intrusive thoughts too, but those are easier to spot and evaluate. This is harder, because again, it is *my* thought. That makes it harder to sit with. Maybe the intrusive part is the voice that questions what kind of person I am for even thinking it. I don’t have the same telltale signs anymore. My physical anxiety isn’t there anymore, it’s all in my head and that makes it so much more confusing. But I don’t know. The line between honesty vs compulsion is so blurry. I just feel lost

Hello everyone! I’m starting to recognize when my thoughts begin to spiral, when i’m seeking reassurance or checking. But I still have the sense of uneasiness and anxiety. I was wondering what others do that allow them to move forward with their day when they realize this? I don’t know if I’m making sense, but what are ways you pull the focus back to the present and yourself? Like besides saying “maybe or maybe not”, more like what do you do with yourself after you recognize the thoughts? I feel like I’m at a “now what?” and don’t know what to do with my anxious energy. I’m trying to find something physical to help me so if you also have any hobbies or interests that help I would love to hear it.

I’ve been really struggling lately with identifying whether I feel a certain way about a situation or people around me or if I’m having intrusive thoughts. Lately, I’ve noticed talking it out with a friend is my first line of defense, sometimes just verbalizing those thoughts can help me hear what I’m saying, and actually start to process how I feel. I do get caught up in making the right decision after that, and it weighs on me heavily, and this is when I struggle to take action or become distant with others that’re in said situation. I try to do more grounding techniques and things that make me happy, I tend to try to focus on something like work or household chores and then relax with a good Gordon Ramsey show hehehe, but I still sit with that confusion of whether this is how I feel? What if it’s just an intrusive thought? What if I’m making the wrong decision or what if I don’t have grounds to feel the way I think I am feeling. This is when talking it out helps for me, but I still always have that inkling that I’m making the wrong decision regardless of what I choose. Does anyone have any coping skills suggestions to aid in this sort of struggle? I feel like it can be quite common to be stuck in those mental gymnastics with your ocd and I’m really curious what you guys do to help process these feelings yourself. I tend to spend time with my pets, watch a show, call a friend, but I’m curious if maybe there’s a recommendation that would work for me that I haven’t tried : ) thank you all for listening!! This is my first community post hehehe