- Username
- garden
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I’m not trying to reassure but since you’re already on the fence about the legitimacy of astrology I’ll ask you this: have you heard of the Barnum effect? It’s basically saying things that are vague enough that it resonates with everyone but worded in a way that sounds specific. Astrology, personality tests, buzzfeed quizzes, etc. do it ALL THE TIME. It then makes the more specific stuff more believable. It’s good to recognize and acknowledge your shortcomings and if jealousy is something you struggle with then you’ve made a great first step by admitting it’s something you’re dealing with. Is there evidence you’re a narcissist or that you lack compassion? Maybe so, maybe not, but if being compassionate and kind is a part of your value system and you’re consistently acting on it (not perfectly of course we all mess up sometimes), then the likelihood that people will interpret you as a mean person is low. I’ve had to say rude things to people for social anxiety/OCD exposures and it’s a really difficult place to be in and I’m sorry you’re experiencing that as one of your biggest OCD fears. Being a bad person is one of my biggest OCD triggers because it can’t reaaally be proven what I am?? What helps me is to think there are just people: not good or bad. All people do good and bad things. The line for what makes a “good” or “bad” person is arbitrary on the culture/time period. People are people and we all make amazing, kind, and compassionate decisions as well as mean, hurtful, and selfish decisions. Sorry this was so long but the whole “bad” person thing hits close to home! Keep on going! I’m supporting you?
Thank you so much. That means a lot. Yes, being kind and compassionate is all I wanna be! I’m very self aware and know all my bad traits (like jealousy) and wish to get rid of them. I know labelling them as bad is already a step in the wrong direction. Emotions aren’t bad. Just intentions and actions I guess. And I know I don’t wanna hurt people and I try my best not to. As for astrology though, what you said is very true! It’s like the confirmation bias in some ways. I guess I was mostly just spooked by the idea that I could have far more bad in me that good. Or the fear that I’m toxic. I’m supporting you too ?
Another way that astrology sometimes seems eerily accurate is (maybe called the positive reinforcement loop or something like that?) that you’ll remember the things that are “correct” or align with your experiences and dismiss and forget the ones that don’t match. That makes the overall similarities seem stronger. I know a trigger can still happen, but maybe this can help you fight the OCD. Good luck!
Astrology bs even science star signs don’t mean nothing I’m Aries and don’t even have the qualities of one
i’m freaking out so much. i’ve been reading a lot about vulnerable / covert narcissism and i literally want to cry. these type of narcissists are introverted and sensitive and i am too. they’re also full of shame and i am too. and they want to be acknowledged which i do too. i feel so down when i’m left out. they also feel a lot of envy like me. i feel sick. i always thought not wanting to be the centre of attention made me LESS of a potential narcissist, but this new subtype of it has sent me spiralling so much. do these traits mean i’m a covert narcissist?!!! i’m so scared. i don’t think i’m entitled or super important... i just want to be enough and feel like i’m enough. i didn’t think that was narcissistic til reading all this stuff today. i’m generally a helper and try to be there for people to meet their needs. so i guess i just want people to look out for me aswell. but i read that these type of narcissists are like that too. i’m so upset rn, i don’t know what to do!!
freaking out a bit. i just read about how narcissists really really idealise partners and then a few weeks in they see that person’s flaws and get turned off. and i literally do that. i don’t know why but i just get easily turned off guys because i fall for the idea of them. also, i’ve realised i don’t feel that close with my friends and maybe i don’t even love them. i know i love my family, so i don’t think i’m a narcissist. but why don’t i love my friends?? and i read narcissists always blame the other person (‘oh i just haven’t found my people yet!’ ‘oh, he’s just not the one for me’) and i guess i do that too. i try to be hopeful that the right people will come along. these two things have been making me so anxious though. it feels like proper proof that i can’t ignore!!!!
Has anyone ever looked up their birth/natal chart? I did today and started researching and now I worry about things I didn’t worry about before. I feel like I opened up a new phobia.
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