- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y ago
having a bad flair up day
i just need words of encouragement. it’s been too much in my head today. i can’t ever be in the moment with family.
i just need words of encouragement. it’s been too much in my head today. i can’t ever be in the moment with family.
I actually left my parents house earlier than I wanted to today because my OCD was flaring up and I didn’t feel like I was enjoying my time w them and just wanted to be alone. You’re not alone in that
Don’t worry. Everyone is struggling their own battles. If you couldn’t enjoy time with your family today there will be many more days. It comes and goes for me as well. You got this!
i completely understand, i think the new year affects it a lot too honestly and im not sure why. it’s good to acknowledge that it is in your head- it’s just thoughts! you are not your thoughts! you’re just the observer of them. unfortunately we can’t and shouldn’t try to control these thoughts, but we can control how we react to them and how we allow them to make us feel. its not easy, but i’m proud of you!
Lately I’ve been feeling so off. I’ve realized I’ve been having more “bad” days. Long story short I’ve been living in pain for over a year and was told I need back surgery. Due to the pain and injury I’ve had many restrictions. I’m unable to do a lot of the things I normally do and I’ve been just sitting around mostly every day not doing much. I almost think I’m slightly depressed. The surgery is about a month away but I just feel like all my emotions are finally hitting me. Like today I felt so upset and lonely and almost spaced out. I’ve been trying to stay positive but I just feel overwhelmed.
I have come so far in my therapy and days like today feel like I’m just still buried in OCD. Sometimes it is so insidious and I don’t realize I’m in a loop. Once I do realize it, it’s hard to get out. I thought sharing here may help, as I never have, but I know you guys will understand. It’s so hard to decipher between regular anxiety and obsessions and compulsions. It has all just become one big ball of panic. Anyway, I’m just struggling today - so thanks for listening.
Tonight is one of the hardest nights I’ve ever had with harm ocd. It’s really one of those nights I’m doubting it’s ocd. I’m having panic attack after panic attack and it’s been the past couple of days where it’s been its highest. I’m doing everything I can to cope, like a hot shower (in the middle of a panic attack, hardest thing ever) skin care, turning my diffuser on and skincare. I took a klonopin but it hasn’t kicked in yet. My brain is beating me up with thoughts like “who thinks like this, you’re a serial killer! A murderer! You should be locked up!” Watching my family around me have peace and be normal is so hard because I’m here struggling to just lay down and relax. Part of me feels like I’m gonna lose my mind and end up in the hospital tonight. I just need positive reinforcement and people who can relate. Are you guys there?
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