Wolfram
- Date posted
- 48w ago
Discussion - does every action define you?
What's your thoughts?
NotSoNewb82NotSoNewb82
- Date posted
- 48w ago
Your past does not define you. It is how you behave going forward that defines you. I didn’t say that someone else did. I may have paraphrased.
Wolfram Wolfram
- Date posted
- 48w ago
Ok, that's the exact kind of statement I feel a lot of people feel guilty about and holds them back from getting better. I always loved the saying, but I feel as if it's not absolute. What about present actions, do they define you? What if you don't know if something is wrong with you? Do these actions define you in your own eyes, or someone else's view of you? If both, then why?
Wolfram Wolfram
- Date posted
- 48w ago
I'm not knocking your input BTW. Keep it coming. I'm trying to spread a better perception and understanding
NotSoNewb82NotSoNewb82
- Date posted
- 48w ago
@Wolfram I suppose you can only act in the present. That is probably a good view for OCD.
Wolfram Wolfram
- Date posted
- 48w ago
@NotSoNewb82 True. What if you didn't know better, or didn't have the education on how to manage yourself properly? Does that define you as a person? Or does that define your situation?
NotSoNewb82NotSoNewb82
- Date posted
- 48w ago
@Wolfram Tbh I’ve come to terms with my real event/false memory or whatever that was and all things were true about it.
Wolfram Wolfram
- Date posted
- 48w ago
@NotSoNewb82 Good. I like your mindset. I'm curious to see others comment as theirs may be different and holding them selves accountable unfairly.
Wolfram Wolfram
- Date posted
- 48w ago
So what I believe, not all actions do. I agree with callum on his point regarding reactions rather than actions and I don't think a lot of people see stuff in their past this way. I think hindsight when reflecting on past actions/ reactions, with new understandings, information and perceptions change our view of those memories. I've seen a lot of people hold them self accountable for past errors as if they are their present self instead of who they were or forget the context of their situation at that time. We don't always have the answers and I think most of us did quite a few things we deem as mistakes. Truthi is, they quite possibly might be a learning curve. We are not born all-knowing. There is no rehearsal for life. Things will happen, good and bad. It's not your fault for having ocd or other mental health issues and brain disorders but you responsible for your actions and reactions once you know better, from that point forward. This is why therapy matters as it can educate and enlighten you. Not all actions always define who you are. Sometimes they define your situation, lack of understanding, perception, emotional and mental states at THAT point in time. You are not one moment. You are many. You are not frozen in time, you are moving through it whether you like it or not so let go of that thing holding you back because you'll never be able to undo it. Let go, move forward leaving your respects for your past self and become something stronger than you could've ever imagined before.
Callum Callum
- Date posted
- 48w ago
Incredibly well put 👏
Callum Callum
- Date posted
- 48w ago
No, there's a reaction to it aswell. You can do an action and feel disgusted by it, out of pure desperation to relieve anxiety or stress. It appears logical to do the compulsion, but you wouldn't have done it at all without the distress from the OCD. That isn't who you are, not at all. And no matter how many times you do a checking compulsion for example, that action doesn't change who you are. The fact that the action and your reaction (opinion) of the action is separate, means the action itself can never define you.
Wolfram Wolfram
- Date posted
- 48w ago
This is the type of answer I was looking for 👌
emilytravelswildemilytravels...
- Date posted
- 48w ago
Maybe not one single action, but many actions over a period of time. For example, if you make a mistake once, and never do it again, that doesn’t define you. But if you do something repeatedly, then I think it does. Good question.
emilytravelswildemilytravels...
- Date posted
- 48w ago
@emilytravelswild But I guess there are a lot of gray areas to this as well. Because we have repeated intrusive thoughts with OCD, but does that define us? I don’t think so.
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- Date posted
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