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-social anxiety -existential ocd -religious ocd

I’m taking it day by day. I recently put in my two weeks notice and have left a toxic workplace. It’s been hard on me because this has happened so many times. I’ve been working since I was in middle school, cleaning hospitals, sleep centers, etc with my mom. And at 16 I got my first real, legal job lol. And it’s been rough, employers can be toxic or the job just isn’t set up with the tools to succeed. This last job I put my all into and like most jobs I’ve had I wasn’t trained, but I persevered and owned it. I had to leave from cruelty and just not setting me up to succeed but fail. I could take the difficulty, but I couldn’t handle the disrespect. I actually really conquered some of my ocd there and used some of it to my advantage with organization and starting up new ways to help the team, as well as actually speaking up for myself and holding a small meeting. It was incredibly difficult to understand whether I was right or wrong, but I followed my heart. Even with conquering those small things like speaking up, I was still left unheard by the people who could change the environment. I’ve struggled quite a bit since then with feeling like I made the right decisions or not. My mental health comes first, but I need money to eat. It can become so discouraging that you’ve got to work to live and these places don’t have to treat you like a person… it would be a lot to go into it. But I’m proud of myself, although I’ve become depressed and have lost myself in my head a bit. I’m coming out of it quicker than ever, and honestly that’s because God never stopped believing in me. God has helped, and my ocd really messes with my relationship with God a lot. I won’t quit, and I won’t give in. I believe in myself. I’m proud because through the pain I’ve still managed to keep up with the house and my laundry and myself pretty well. Today wasn’t that bad and that gives me hope. I’ve recently been working on my breathing too, when things get overwhelming I take deep breaths for 60 seconds. It helps settle me and my heartbeat. I know that my ocd is gonna fight me thru getting my next job. Tons of reasonable and unreasonable thoughts. I’ve got to try and I’ve got to let go of what could or could not happen and be myself. I’m a child of the most high God and if He is for me then who can be against me? I’ve done nothing wrong, and I’m a great worker. People have seen that and people will see that again. I can do this, if I believe and try ! I believe in you !

i don’t know if this falls under a specific theme or is even related to ocd. if someone could help me out i would really appreciate it ever since i was younger, i’ve had really upsetting thoughts about losing my loved ones and it would get to a point where i vividly imagine their death scenes play out in my head and it’s started to effect me during a day-to-day basis. sometimes i even imagine myself dying and the imagery shows me how my friends and family react to my passing usually when i think of something happy, my brain enters this cycle where i begin to think of some upsetting and distressing moment and i cant help but think about it for the rest of the day i’ve had a common fear of death for a really long time, but it’s gotten really bad now is this a form of some intrusive thought? please let me know what you think

I haven’t been diagnosed with existential ocd but I have every single one of the symptoms. Death/afterlife and the meaning of life is 90% of what I think about day after day. I really hate it. I wish I could go back to the days when I never thought about death. I really just want it to stop. The worst part is know that no matter what it’s inevitable and nobody can stop it😞 any suggestions on how to feel better??

Why do I have the urge to off myself when having ocd thoughts? But I dont want to die.

Has anyone else’s contamination OCD just gone through the roof since living through a pandemic? I didn’t even realize that’s what it was until the other day. My themes are primarily health and existential… But now I realize it’s also contamination, or at least I think so. I avoid public places, still try not to eat indoors, and if I do, I literally go into a countdown of how many days it’s been since being around people to know when I’m in the “safe zone.” How do y’all deal with it?

hey everyone! so i'm not sure what to post so i guess i'll just post what i'm going through, i hope someone sees this who understands. i feel really alone. ‼️⚠️TW⚠️‼️- thanatophobia, intrusive thoughts, harm OCD, religious OCD, existential dread/crisis/questions GENERAL INFORMATION so i'm 15F, just got into high school. i've always had thanatophobia (extreme fear of d3ath and the process), but as of recent it's gotten terrible. it's all i think about. my intrusive thoughts are usually related to it, and sometimes i think that "oh i know it's going to happen soon! it's going to happen today!" and i'll believe it and freak out for the rest of the day. my parents have been telling me that there isn't a point in worrying, but i'd argue against that. it's not like i chose this, it's not like i want to be worried. it just happens, i cannot control it no matter what i do. the idea of not being on earth frightens me, like for example: i cannot stand thinking about the moon landing and stuff because those people aren't on earth. i like it here, no matter how messed up it is, it's all i know. and many people understand that thought process. earth is my home, it brings me everything i need. it feeds me, lets me sleep, brings me air, gives me water, it's nature surrounds me in comforting light. the earth is my home, i love her, and she loves me. i don't want to leave her, because she's the only thing i know. RELIGIOUS BACKGROUND. im a christian, however i guess i would say i don't associate with that title due to the fact christian's tend to not really be what they say they are. i'm a christ follower, and i believe he died and rose again. people tell me heaven is beautiful, that it's the best place ever. and while yes it's a good place, it's also terrifying getting there. and i often freak myself out asking myself questions of "what does it look like? does it feel like a dream? is it physical?" so many things in my head. people tell me to read NDE's, but those only make me more anxious. EXISTENTIAL PROBLEMS so my existence has been hard to think about. i often think about how cruel death is, how it's so hard being alive because you are taunted with death. you build things just for it to all break down. and that's something i struggle with greatly. i look around and think to myself "wow, these are things i love, but in the end they don't matter do they?" and that isn't too comforting. being around friends hurts too, because i can't just enjoy myself. existence is such an insane thing, and how one can exist and then not. that's terrifying!! LIFE STRUGGLES i struggle to take care of myself, i won't shower for a couple days nor brush my teeth because i really can't bring myself to get out of bed. i also don't go outside a lot, due to the fear of getting into an accident. i struggle to join into social activities because my brain is always busy with worrying rather than enjoying the moment. i cant relax when i'm out of the house because of the what ifs that play in my head. i don't feel safe when i'm not home, and that's a problem because if i don't leave the house then i'm not getting sunshine which, by the way, helps mental health a LOT. i kinda threw myself into a pickle. anywho, i really just need someone who understands. who gets what i'm going through, who saw this and maybe thought "hey, that sounds like what i am/i was going through!" and could maybe tell me their story and what they did. i feel so alone. and so helpless. thank you if you read through all of this, much love to you 🫶🫶

Hi all, first post. Long time health and somatic ocd sufferer, now debilitated with anxiety and a new depression over death - not in a suicidal way - and the afterlife. I can't accept that everyone I love will die, or just human mortality in general. I am grieving something very intensely that hasn't even happened yet. I can't stop thinking about the unstoppable march of time towards death. I can't accept the idea that what is so special in this world - or my world - will be erased. I feel like I will never get over this. I do have beliefs - I'm a progressive Christian, and family members of mine have had experiences of deceased family members on their deathbeds. However, my OCD mind cannot accept uncertainty. How can I - or anyone - be okay if we don't know what happens when people die? I feel like I'm going absolutely insane, and I will never be happy again.

Does anyone have like chronic thoughts about the damage capitalism does and like research things like “when will we have free healthcare” and like wake up for their 9-5 feeling so angry at the structure of the work day and how it takes up so much time. Like idk or have chronic stress over the genocide in Palestine or injustice

Some of the convos on here scare me. Like I genuinely think a small amount of people on here have other issues besides OCD and it’s making me freak out about if that’s me too.