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soo im 17 , and im on 100 mg of Zoloft. And I’m just kind of thinking am I gonna be on this medicine forever, is this medicine going to mess up my brain, or like the development of my brain it’s really messing with me.

I’ve been feeling really really depressed the past few days due to health concerns. I’ve been really feeling down like not wanting to be here anymore and it’s scaring me. I was in the doctor’s office this morning and I got a scary thought that said maybe I should just k*ll someone in here instead of k*lling myself. Then the thoughts continued… this man walked past and I thought “hurt him” I obviously wouldn’t want to hurt anyone let alone a bug on the sidewalk, but the thoughts began to overtake me and I had a panic attack. It’s still bothering me and I’m still scared it’s real and that I’m going crazy. This happens to me a lot after I watch a documentary about someone who hurt someone else. I begin to think I am somehow going to go crazy like the person in the documentary and hurt someone. Although I don’t want to .. I would never ever want to hurt anyone.

Hi everyone, This last week I’ve had so much anxiety that I’m going into psychosis. I have weird intrusive thoughts about contamination and other weird things like if I use my left hand or do anything left something bad will happen or certain numbers mean bad things when counting. My psychiatrist says it’s just anxiety but ever since my anxiety attacks last week I feel so weird and scared that I’m going to go into psychosis or crazy. My family doctor said it’s possible which scared me and now I’m feeling really scared. I started medication again but can’t seem to snap out of it. There have been some amazing people here that have giving my great help and tips. But I just need to be reassured that I won’t follow into psychosis. I know it’s a small percent of people but I’m just so scared. Any help would be great. Even my psychiatrist said I won’t but can’t calm down. Any help would be amazing, thank you!

hi all hope everyone is doing well. i had been doing a lot better since my last ocd relapse last year in oct but i’m currently really struggling with health anxiety/ocd. it feels like the toughest theme yet. while i was able to get better without medication before, i’m now considering it because ive realized that ive had too many relapses in the past five years than I would have liked to have. i’ve always been hesitant to get on an ssri because i’m terrified of the adjustment period. and now my health anxiety is playing into the fear a little with the side effects and what not. anyway i’d really appreciate any insight/advice. thank you!!

I was looking into stuff for my friend who apparently has no internal monologue or capability to imagine images which is amazing but I can't imagine a life with that. I knew someone years that also couldn't imagine images a few years back and asked her what would happen if they took psychedelics. It turns out they've been using something called psilocybin to tackle a range of disorders like the ones mentioned above, ptsd and ocd with some positive results. I feel as if it might untangle some stuff in our minds in order to see more clearly. The hallucinations of the psychedelics may purely be our brain reorganising itself. Thought it was interesting

So I had a panic attack last week and I started to feel derealization which I was I knew was going to pass, later in the week I had to go on a road trip which I was already feeling uneasy about and then all at once I had the worse anxiety attack, ever since then I feel like I’m going crazy. My doctor scared me by saying I need to go on medication (family doctor) because I’m scared of going crazy and that’s my biggest fear right now. My psychiatrist said I won’t but just get on medication to reduce my anxiety. Any help would be amazing I’m so scared of going into psychosis. The racing thoughts seemed to slowed down but I feel very weird and disconnected. Any help would be amazing!

As we know the pandemic really hit all of us hard and for me it was what started my ocd. At the time I didn’t think of it as such, I just thought I was being safe and precautious. Fast forward here, and I still find myself washing my hands frequently and obsessively, being afraid to shake hands or touch normal daily objects because other people have touched, and afraid to even go to my public gym afraid of being contaminated. Now don’t get me wrong I am able to go out and have a good time but I always have to know where the bathroom is to make sure my hands are clean after I touch something. I freak out over if I hear someone cough at work or in the gym and when I have to eat something without washing my hands or let’s say I touched a spoon with an unwashed hand I start to overthink. It’s gotten to a point where it’s more than just contamination, I find myself being over complicating so many aspects of life, I wake up and have this anxious period right away for no reason at all. Have any of you guys experienced what I’m doing through ? What can I do to better myself and go back to being myself pre pandemic?

So i JUST started to feel better with getting my OCD under control with therapy and medication. Today I learned I have HPV. I don't have the bad type, my pap smear was actually normal I just had the presence of the virus. Nurse told me there is really nothing I should be worried about or need to do except get my immune system back up and healthy and its 90% likely ill clear it on my own in 1-2 years. STILL!!! 90% is not 100% and the internet has NOT been my friend today so iv decided I should stay off of it. Im scared, I feel dirty. My husband has taken the news well with a " oh well, whats mine is yours and yours is mine lol" attitude but I just wanted to see if anyone on here had some advice. PLEASE no horror story and negative experiences or words of caution (I got them all already) I need success stories, tips on how to manage the health anxiety spiral that hasn't happened YET but I feel is coming. Im usually all over this page giving advice, today I need it. kind words and compassion, please.

I feel like I wanna throw up I feel shivers It feels like you’re going to be sick I can’t sleep at all I stayed up all night because of this (not the first time) I physically feel sick

Hey it’s me again, I feel very overwhelmed I’ve been dealing with my OCD for a few months now and it’s been a ride for sure. Lately I’ve been dealing with these thoughts that I’m crazy it’s actually inexplicable I don’t know how to describe what I feel anymore I feel like I’m Loosing sense of who I am like I don’t even know what’s going on like I’m just crazy literally I feel crazy I really just wanna be okay and just be able to enjoy life I feel like I’m never happy anymore. I feel so overwhelmed like I’m holding in my tears so badly I just wanna sit there and cry and I don’t know what to do anymore I really don’t I was doing just fine for weeks and then BOOM I feel like it comes back 10x fucking worst and I don’t like being alone because I feel like I’m gonna loose control and do something or like I’m just gonna snap I’m scared I’m Gonna snap in any moment n I feel like I’m just this crazy person and I feel like something is in my head telling me I’m crazy or I am but I don’t hear anything I just like visualize it like I imagine it in my head I was dealing with harm ocd this week and last week towards my husband and I hate it so much because I just wanna enjoy my relationship like a normal human being I miss being normal I always wanna go get checked to a doctor so they could check my brain and tell me I’m not crazy and I feel from my ocd or stress I’m Gonna get psychosis or schizophrenia from my head thinking so much stuff that I’m just gonna colapse I don’t know what to fuck I don’t like medication I’ve been dealing with so much stress this week from so many episodes I feel like when I’m around people I forget about things but something they try to cripple up on me but I don’t like being alone and I hate not liking that because I feel like then people have to monitor me to see I’m Not gonna do anything or to distract my head I wanna be able to feel alone and being okay I don’t even like listening to music anymore it makes me panic idk I need to hear someone talking or something because then I panic I get to in my head I just don’t know why I’m feeling this if this ocd or my anxiety or my depression getting bad again I feel like I don’t enjoy anything like I’m Bored of life fuck I wanna be fine I wanna be able to think right I feel my head is going 100000 mph please I need someone to comment on this.

For anyone taking this ssri what is your dosage, when do u normally take it (concern about weight gain, flat emotion, sexual side effect as I’m in a relationship). Any advice would help everyone here with ocd would like to know doses and what time of day you take and if you have experience improvements or side effects. I just started today on 10mg but would want to increase and stay at 20mg if it works out. Today been feeling sad but I think that’s more bc of something that happen (found someonelied about something from past) so I think it’s more that than side effect other than that nothing I ended taking at 3 PM. Since my bf works 3pm- 1 am so maybe I experience any side effects during this time and not before or after. Again not sure how this works thank you

Hello, I wanted to reach out and see if anyone else is dealing with OCD pertaining to health? Every day I'm having a new diagnosis for myself and constantly monitoring different sensations in my body. I feel a compulsion to also constantly check my body for lumps, bumps, etc. The saddest part of all is that it's also something I encounter with my kids. I'm constantly in a state of flight or fight waiting for something to happen

I usually always watch my drink or leave it around a close friend, but about a week ago, I had to do something urgent & took my eyes off of my drink for a long time. Somebody who I’m not sure if they like me was around it & then as soon as I finished what I was doing they left off & when they came back they were looking in my direction. I started to toss it altogether, but I took a sip & thought it didn’t taste the same but it could just be OCD. It’s been a week but I still feel uneasy worried my drink was tampered with or that there was some type of undetected poison. Even when I’m doing good, I wonder back to it & it makes me anxious. How do I move past it?

I’ve been vaping for about three years now. I’ve tried to quit multiple times but with the people around me, also do, and it makes it difficult to stop buying it and or hitting it. My OCD is based off obsessive thoughts on my health and worrying about natural bodily feelings. Twitches, random pains throughout my body, scare me and make me feel like I can’t control my thoughts. When I vape, i’ve heard about lungs collapsing and I worry about it. I want to stop, but can’t seem to. If I have a headache I worry about a brain tumor, when there are many reasons I could have one. When I mess up a sentence I worry about a stroke, and check my face to see if it’s even. I worry about cancer on a regular basis, a small pain or lymph node swollen, i convince myself it’s cancer. I go to the doctor often because of this. It’s scary, that there is a possibility it could happen. I hate this.

Hello, I want to share my ocd story as I’m struggling with it severely right now. I was a very anxious child, when I was nine I started to have intrusive thoughts/fear/theme that I was somehow “pregnant”. Now this was concerning because I was nine..and a virgin CLEARLY. I hadn’t even gotten my period. The reason this scared me so much is that because i was a virgin, I was afraid if I was pregnant and the baby came, no one would believe me and everyone would hate me. When I was 13 this soon transitioned to being the same fear only this time because I had my period I was afraid that I either got gr@ped in my sleep, or somehow sp3rm was on the toilet seat and it well yk. However, none of this made any sense and I made myself sick worrying about it. My ocd would take a turn when I developed emotophobia, the intense fear of vomit and vomiting and so alot of my intrusive thoughts regarded vomit. As I got older they would switch and I was ALWAYS under some sort of stress. That’s when things got worse, I’m also diagnosed with anxiety so all the therapists were just treating me for anxiety but the main cause of this anxiety despite other things, is my ocd. I started to have “religious” ocd, as I consider myself a Christian and it’s a big part of my life, doing compulsions like “read that verse again, you messed up” ect. Which consumed a lot of my life. Here’s where things get hard to talk about, I started having what they call moral ocd? I was at least 15? And I thought my life was over, now the thing is when I was a kid I was messed with once, which gave me a lot of anxiety over the years and I didn’t end up telling anyone till I was older, I thought it was my fault. So I know that I would never, ever want somebody else to go through something so horrific. This fear eventually subsided, until this past year. When I was sixteen, my boyfriend sa’d me and I didn’t really have time to realize what had happened. We broke up right after which hurt a lot but I was relieved. Ever since then I was always very cautious about people, I knew what that felt like, so much shame, and not feeling like you can do anything about it. Eventually I started to get that moral ocd back, things like “what if I’m attracted to so and so” a family member ect. This would repulse me. I also watched a lot of true crime which didn’t help anything, this caused me to develop pocd/moral ocd. Now, I feel trapped I feel like I’m not at all what my intrusive thoughts say, I would never do them, and I want to isolate from EVERYONE. I feel like I don’t deserve to be here, I feel ashamed like God is ashamed of me and I have just cried and cried. I really need some encouragement or at least advice.

So I my family shared a water bottle with me and they were still drinking it. I was still a little sick with my sinus infection, although it's getting a lot better than it was before. They gave me the bottle and I drunk from it. I really don't know why I did this. What was I thinking? Why didn't I warn them? Why did I do this? I don't understand why I just went ahead and drunk from the bottle. This isn't the first time I think that I got them sick. I still had this same sinus infection and they had sore throats just like I had sore throats. I felt so awful about it. It was completely my fault that I got them sick but they did get better while I'm still dealing with a dry cough and blowing my nose. I guess I thought they wouldn't get sick? How does that even make sense? I guess it's because my mom didn't get sick when she drunk from me after I told her she shouldn't. She was fine. But now it seems like things are different. My mom doesn't seem sick but my sibling seems to be showing slightly symptoms of what I have. Why did I make such a dumb mistake? Why didn't I just save it for last? Why did I do this? It was 100% my fault. I don't want them to be sick at all. So why did I drink from the bottle? I just don't know why I would do this. I guess I was just ruminating in my head that they wouldn't get sick because I'm getting so much better and my mom didn't get sick from last time. But still, why would I do this? I feel like a bad person. I feel like a bad sibling and a son. I just feel like I've failed because of this. This completely threw off my day and it got me to spiral into old coping habits that only make me feel worse. I just don't get why I did this and why I wasn't thinking.

When my intrusive thoughts get bad and I try my hardest to push them out it feels like I’m physically straining my head, like it legitimately hurts really bad and I feel like I get dizzy and can’t think and I can’t stop focusing and then my ocd causes me to think that there’s something wrong with my brain and that I need surgery or to be lobotomized or something crazy like that, does this happen to anyone else?

Two weeks ago I was on a walk with my husband and daughter at night in a small town. I felt something flutter past the back of my knee and thought maybe it was a bug. Then I happened to look up in the sky and saw a bat flying around. My thoughts immediately jumped to rabies. We got to the car and I checked my leg, but it was too dark to see much. So I checked again once we got home and saw a small, red swollen bump. I ended up going down a Google rabbithole all about bats and rabies. I didn't sleep that night, but after that I was able to sit with the anxiety for the most part and it slowly eased over the next few days. Now it's 2 weeks later and I've been feeling under the weather for 3 days. Chills on/off, back is a bit sore, and anxiety is at an all time high. I don't want to go down fighting rabies of all things!

So I started using tampons but I don’t know how to insert right yesterday I was wearing one and it felt super uncomfortable so I took it off like 2 hours later and today I did it again and but took it off by the like the 5 minutes or 10 max because I seen that if you wear it wrong you could get TSS and I took it off and now I’m worrying because I seen that you could get TSS from taking out dry tampons so from that I was so worried and stressing I always take Magnesuim glycinate at night 400mg and today thinking I was gonna take another one I don’t know why I took that one I took it again at 12 pm and last night I took it like at 10pm now I’m scared something is gonna happen to me or I’m gonna die or od of it which it’s possible and I’m feeling cramps from the Magnesuim but I’m also on my period which makes it 10x worst ugh I’m very stressed I don’t know what to even worry about because I know you could also get cramps for TSS and back pain and I’m getting it ugh guys idk what to do I’m so overwhelmed

Hey everyone so I’m a college student and since my sisters birthday is this weekend I decided to go home for 3 days but I just realized right now that I forgot to pack my Zoloft and since yesterday I had a cold and was taking a bunch of cold medication I felt weird about taking my meds so I didn’t take my meds yesterday. I’m freaking out right now because I’ve never gone through withdrawals or anything but unless I cut my stay short that’s 3 days I’m going without medication.has anyone ever been in a similar situation or is there anything helpful I could do or even just some words to calm me down would be so helpful thank you 🙏🙏