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I’m kinda losing hope and feeling defeated

I’ve spiraled to the lowest of rock bottom. I now have all subtypes and I do not deserve to live. I hate my mind so much. This has all happened in 3 months and all because of reassurance.

Has anyone taken Prozac while having this theme and it seemed to help ? I’m scared to take it because of the theme . Also I’m not suicidal never have been but this theme idk makes me depressed and panic and think of it then freaks me out . Is this normal ? Or am I actually having ideations ? Sometimes I feel like the best plan would be to be in a mental house so I know I can’t hurt myself . It’s just weird cause before all this started I had panic attacks about dying in my sleep , then it switched to dying of a heart attack which led me to get all my blood work done and quitting smoking and alcohol and caffeine and since may I’ve been dealing with this theme and it’s making me freaking confused like I have 3 kids I love my life but it’s fucks with me like makes me depressed.

I think I have borderline personality disorder. It hurts so fucking bad I don’t know what to do I can’t grieve anymore. I’m so full of it….I’m so incredibly full of grief and sadness. I wish someone could put my pieces back together.

I know that God is good and loving. He has proven it to me so many times. But recently a video came on my for you page and it was kinda blasphemous. It was basically making fun of some pastor in a church. But I found it really funny. I knew that it was disrespectful to God. I wasn’t laughing at the fact that it disrespectful to God. I was laughing because the pastor was doing something out of the ordinary. but now im scared that He’s gonna punish me with one of my worst fears that OCD has been revolving around. I just think back to some of the punishments that He gave in the Bible, and im scared that im gonna get punished in the worst way.

I was recently diagnosed with OCD last month, and my new psychiatrist started me on two new medications. I have not been put in any therapies yet, (talk therapy has always proved ineffective for me) but I am open to it in the future.) For the past 16 years, I’ve been living my life diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. My new psychiatrist has “undiagnosed” me with those two disorders, and diagnosed me with OCD. She said my “anxiety” has actually been caused by severe untreated OCD. I particularly struggle with suicidal thoughts/ideation and have been hospitalized multiple times for severe depression episodes; including Catatonia and Existential Crises. Being treated for those other disorders my entire life (starting age 12) many of the medications they put me on always made my symptoms worse. This new revelation has caused me to experience feelings of confusion and loss of self-identity. This new diagnosis is scary to me, even if it makes so much sense. I’d appreciate any advice on navigating this time in my life. I appreciate this app finding its way to me in this time. ❤️

Today I realized I’m actually really scared of becoming a bad person. I’ve been dealing with symptoms of OCD for a few years now, or maybe they were always there and i never knew what it was. I’m scared that i’ll eventually become a bad person. I’m scared I’ll hurt someone one day, even though i have no violent urges or tendencies. I’m scared i’ll be a pedophile even though i have no attraction to kids. I’m scared that i’ve done something really bad to someone and i don’t remember. I’m just scared and I wish I could tell people my thoughts but i know it’s hard to understand intrusive thoughts when you don’t have them.

I just think this isn’t ocd anymore, i don’t know how to explain it very well but every since my ocd started i’ve been getting this weird sensation that i described as anxiety but i associated with the fact that i’m actually going crazy and that i’ve been faking mi whole life and i want to hurt the people i love (specifically my mom) i know i love her but i get trigger literally by everything and i’m so scared. My mind is telling me that i don’t have empathy so i’m constantly checking if i feel the way i have to when something sad happens and the thoughts are racing, i’m so tired of this it’s like i don’t know who i am anymore, i feel like i’m about to snap and hurt someone.. pls someone respond to this

I’m so worried that I’m suffering from Copmhet, but I love my boyfriend and i genuinely don’t want to leave him to date a woman. There’s a girl at work that I think has pretty hair and i wouldn’t mind being her friend but my brain is shouting at me “leave your bf!!” “You want her!” And these thoughts won’t leave me alone. I love him so much.

Just got an intrusive thought and I’m having a panic attack as I write this. Someone called me weird today, somebody said I can’t listen at all, then someone else said something hurtful. Been feeling down today and then as I was eating I got an intrusive thought that said I am going depressed again. I’ve been going crazy. Fidgeting, bouncing my leg, sped up breathing… And I feel light headed and I just need somebody to tell me everything is okay. I can’t tell my mother because I told her I think I have OCD and she simply brushed it off and she will get frustrated with me if I tell her I am having a panic attack…

does anyone have like the strong fear to be always distressed and is hypervigilant all the time for signs it's true? and then get triggered when noticing even in the slightest?? how to handle that? I've traed ignoring but it doesn't work

I feel like there are times with my OCD that I don't feel anxiety but just feel this low grade, nagging, constantly under the surface guilt/sense of dread. Does anyone else have this? Like this morning I woke up and remembered something that happened yesterday that wasn't great and now it's not even specific "what if" thoughts or fears, just like this feeling that I did something wrong and everything is wrong because of it. I listened to an OCD podcast yesterday and they mentioned that there's also a lot of guilt and shame with OCD but that anxiety gets focused on more and that was helpful because there's this whole other set of experiences I have that I feel like are related to OCD but aren't necessarily anxiety or fear feelings. Anyone else have this experience?

Hi, guys! Can ocd thoughts be ego-syntonic? I feel that usually I really believe them. For example, while having retroactive jealousy, I usually believe that the past of my partner is important and that asking questions about it would definitely help me decide if she is right for me and that I should ask those questions to make sure that her past is fine. Like usually I WANT to ask them. Sometimes, I am even looking for things I haven't asked yet.

hey do i recent started taking birth control pills again and i noticed that my moods are really bad and i am feeling very depressed and suicidal should i stop taking them is this normal ?

What does your thoughts get like? i start having severe panic attacks to the point i can’t breathe. i also freak out and start thinking i have to go to a mental hospital because of my thoughts. i would never act on these thoughts but they are killing me and my panic attacks are getting out of control. i’m scared that my ocd is going to give in and im going to do it but i know for a fact im not but im freaking out because these are so distressing.

I am angry 24/7. I’m in a constant war with my mind, and the images I get inside my head are unbearable to say the least. My mom passed when I was 17. (I’m 24 now)my two older brothers died this past November 2023 in the same week. I have no way of expressing my grief. I feel like nobody understands me. I’m not an alcoholic, but I feel like the only times I’m able to feel genuine emotion is when Im out with family drinking. My OCD is a battle from the moment I wake up, until the moment I drift off to sleep. And I feel restless because I have no relief while I’m sleeping, because of the kind of dreams I get, that are based off of the themes of my OCD. This is my first time seeking help with this, and I have had OCD since elementary school. I don’t wanna carry this anymore. Please, any advice you can pass along, share it. I feel alone.

Everything I see or read or hear, I seem to find some connection in the thing that I obsess about. Been going on for about a year. Is this normal?

I have been boycotting McDonald’s and all the fast foods and most brands that I know of that support Israel. Especially McDonald’s I haven’t eaten it since the news came out back in October but recently I ate it because my brother and his girlfriend were paying for most of my food from other places on Uber eats. They had limited choices as well because we were in hotel and they kept spending money on Uber eats to buy all of us food and they were running low. They didn’t want to eat McDonald’s because they know who they support but my brothers head was hurting and they were hungry , so we decided to eat some but they were telling me it’s okay you’re not gonna eat it again it’s only for this one time because ordering Uber lift or Uber eats is too expensive. But now that I ate it just feels like I broke a value or moral and idk if they’re that easy to break because I thought about it now but I could’ve easily just starved until the next day when I got back home. I know I only ate one time but that one time was enough for me to feel ashamed , which I feel I should be for knowing what’s going on. I do what I can to support Palestine but after this I need reevaluate myself.

I was diagnosed with OCD 2 years ago and have struggled with it nearly my whole life. I’m 17 and the thing I struggle most with is thinking other people, mostly people I look up to or famous people are “watching” me or “listening” to my thoughts, specifically my intrusive or embarrassing ones. Although I know it’s not true it really affects my daily life. I believe this falls under magical thinking OCD. when I think of an intrusive thought, I think these people can hear it especially when I’m doing an action so I have to re-do that action over and over until I do it without thinking of that intrusive thought. This also affects things I enjoy doing, I’ve been really wanting to exercise but when I go to do it I get so embarrassed cause I think I’m being watched by a famous person or people I see as above me that I can’t bring myself to do it. I’m sorry if this is lengthy but I was just wondering if anyone else suffers with this and if you do, do you have any tips? Thank you if you read this much.💗

Hey, I am 16 years old and I was on snapchat quick add and i added some people. But i asked what age they were and three of them people said they were 12 and 13 which has been making me feel really uncomfortable. I blocked then right after. Im i in the wrong here? I am worried if i said anything abnormal to them.