Welcome to
the NOCD Community

Is it true that your true desires will make you feel content, comfortable, with little to no anxiety. And an ocd thought (intrusive false thought) will make you feel anxious, confused and panic? Is that correct?

So I've unintentionally started to confront some of my triggers. I have real event OCD with "I don't deserve" thoughts that have latched onto pretty much every aspect of my life. I'm leaving overseas tomorrow with my partner to go and see her family, we've had this trip planned for awhile, and for a long time I was good with it. Two days ago my head goes "but wait, you don't deserve to enjoy going overseas" forcing me to confront this trigger. So long story short, I'm unintentionally doing erp. The problem is I find it so overwhelming, all my old OCD triggers have come up at the same time due to me being stressed. I've also stopped sleeping well, is this normal for starting erp?.

Anyone currently going through this? Or went through this? I have harm ocd and it’s either about my family or then about myself and I feel afraid of not having any hope any more. I get suicidal thoughts both as intrusive thoughts but also as something I would want to stop all the anxiety I feel. Any help is appreciated

Please could someone give this a read. I’m so sorry it’s a little long. Tw. Mention of SA My ex and I broke up 2 years ago. Due to be being obsessive (constantly wanting to be around him) and incredibly jealous (not liking/ wanting him to spend time with anyone that I didn’t like. Ie. His friends.) (I never ever forced him or asked him to not/do anything) In hindsight, we did not match well as a couple. But he was my first love. My first everything. And do I still miss him? Yeah I do. A lot. I can live with the missing him part. What I’m struggling to live with is the guilt. And I mean guilt that makes me physically hurt and ill. The guilt of how I acted, the guilt of how toxic I was and how blind I was to it. I never intended to be toxic, furthest thing from my aim. I just wanted to spend every living second with this man. And he wanted time to himself. During the relationship I was hospitalised multiple times due to guilt. Guilt is such a strong debilitating emotion I feel. I have become obsessed with the guilt, if that makes any sense. My main worry is if I hurt him. I don’t want his life ruined because of me. The second we broke up I blocked him on EVERYTHING. and he saw this as an act of violence, I did it to stop myself from begging for him back. He then turned against me and I’m 90% sure he hates me. And I don’t blame him, but I don’t want him to. When I was going through the worst of the breakup I believed he may have SA me and I told 2 of my closest friends that I think he did. A few days later I reviewed the situation to realise it wasn’t SA, I quickly told my friends I was wrong, I felt so awful and I was then hospitalised due to guilt. Since then one of the people I told that to is close with my ex, and I live in fear that she will tell him that I wrongly accused him of SA. I then became obsessed with the thought of ‘what if I SA him and I didn’t know I did’. I used to hide in my house scared that I would be arrested for doing something that I don’t even know if I did. That thought passed after months of suffering, sometimes it crosses my mind again. I have never seen him since the breakup and everyday I fear I will see him. I have had so so many thoughts since then and the guilt is debilitating. What can I do? What is this strong feeling? Please help me :(

I'm having a very hard time with contamination and health concerns OCD,I feel I'm about to give up. My parents even if they live extremely far from me and I haven't seen them in more than 6 years ago, still they don't really try better ways to help me through the distance. They have an immense lack of empathy, kindness, understanding, patience and compassion about my situation.My husband has become a monster, so mean and heartless. I'm all alone with my toddler. My hands are absolutely destroyed due to the over washing. I have waited 2 weeks to be able to open and use some makeup I ordered, but as I saw the box was opened Istarted to think what if someone has deliberately tampered the makeup, or polluted it with something very dangerous as Anthrax spores? And I never dropped that belief, I asked here for opinions and suggestions on how to deal with that. I got so helpful, kind and good answers, still I couldn't do a change. Now when I was reading a little more about OCD to try to find more help. I crossed with this, I didn't know, after reading this,l feel completely disappointed, to live with OCD, depression and anxiety it's not life, now reading that we are in higher risk of developing BD and Schizophrenia, it's awful. In days like this..I wish I was dead or never even born.

I’ve been on Fluvoxamine for almost a month now. I’ve had no side effects besides excessive fatigue. Has anyone else had experience with Luvox and sleepiness?

My bf broke up with my yesterday it’s a long story short it was to do with his mental health anyways I was a mess like crying 24/7 I haven’t eaten u know the rest but he sent me a text saying he’s had a think and he realised what’s been troubling him and that he’s gonna get help and he wants to get back with me and i was so happy we spoke and told eachother we gonna take it slow but my ocd is creeping in and saying what if I don’t love him as much as I did even tho i love him and want to be with him and help him we have been together for 4 years it’s stressing me out

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGe2gL8Gu/ Why do I feel like i'm attracred to her??? She isnt even masculine

im always worried about something when im bored and for a long time i have been scared of being a psyhopath how do i tell myself im not someone help and tell my how do i tell myself im not is this ocd?

I learned alot and now i know it only feels real because we are afraid and we are thinking in a fearful headspace, but i didnt heard that it actually gives you the feelings, and i have a problem with this. I struggle now with religious ocd, and because its been hard for me now, i started feel like im angry at God, which is okay for some, but i do realized its good for me cause it only makes me stop working on the relationship with God and then i feel like he is far away... but anytime i have anger towards God or when im tired and someone says God is so good cause He heals, i just get this thoughts that maybe it doesnt, idk, He doesnt helps me now. And i suddenly feel bad cause i know this is not real. And i start to deal with this as a real problem that maybe i need to work on this and it gets worse. Or i try to ignore it but maybe i still give importance to that cause im afraid the anger is genuine and it comes back after time. So just today i thought about this, maybe ocd its not just makes you believe that you feel like it, what if it really sends you the actual feeling, like for me i actually feel angry at God, but bc its not who i am and i know its bad i quickly judge myself and feel bad. So in this way the solution wouldnt be stop judging myself and accept that im angry at God and deal with that, but to actually ignore it cause its ocd. So in this way ocd actually can make me feel in hard times that im angry at God, or its really me who is angry at God? Idk maybe i overthink it but if i try to see it through, i just spin and make it worse, i even feel bad about saying its just ocd cause maybe being angry at God is normal and i just want to avoid feel bad about myself, but i know staying in that path, accepting that im actually start to question God and its okay, it just makes me feel worse so idk. Maybe ocd really can make you feel things that arent your true self

The last couple of days, I have had intense OCD. It also just so happens to be a day I am on my cycle and a day off from work. I am also reducing one of my medications (Seroquel XR), but am still on two other medications (Lamotrigine and Cymbalta) as well as hydroxyzine occasionally for anxiety. Does anyone else have more OCD while on their period or on days off of work? Or has had increased symptoms while decreasing their dose of a medication? Also, what are some tips or coping strategies you use with intrusive thoughts?

I’ve lived with OCD for over 40 years. Needless to say, I’ve developed a lot of coping mechanisms and small hidden that aren’t necessarily healthy. Yesterday was my first session where I did a very simple exposure (staring at the smoke alarm for 1 minute) that i thought would be no biggie, but turns out really knocked me into a lot of fears and anxiety. Is this common?!?! I think so, but I’ve never actually experienced this. Thank you 💛

Hi all- I have been relapsing in terms of my fear of driving. Plus I want to become a highway driver and learn to parallel park. Any tips from others with driving OCD?

i could use some support right now. I had a harm thought and then another one like “i think im gonna do it” and it didn’t cause me anxiety and i don’t understand why. and it felt really real and now i just feel scared and confused i keep telling myself i dont want to hurt anyone and then im like what if im just saying that

I know skin picking is part of OCD. I’m 35 and been doing this my whole life. I recently started breaking out on my shoulders, chest and back due to hormonal changes and cannot stop picking! I’m causing myself scars it’s so bad. Does anyone know how to stop this??? It’s embarrassing!

I have no official diagnosis for OCD but I have recently expected I have it. My whole life I’ve had people tell me I have OCD but I thought they were joking or making fun of me and I’m not a person to self diagnose but then I realized how obsessive I am over my thoughts and started researching. I do constantly ask myself pretty much everyday why I am the way I am, I constantly think I’m hurting someone emotionally then I have to check for reassurance, I beat myself down consistently. I’m always worried I’m going to hurt myself therefore hurting the people who love me. I obsess over the way my body looks and managed to get to the point I only eat once a day. I have never admitted this but I have violent sexual thoughts but they’re directed towards me not other people, these thoughts are completely against what I believe are my morals. I do have a need for organization and functionality within that organization, if someone touches the way I’ve organized those things it gives me high anxiety and I either have to fix it right then or I end up avoiding it altogether until I can find time to fix it cause I know I’ll take hours. If I write notes and I make one mistake, I have to rewrite the whole thing.. this caused a lot of overdue homework in high school and would take up hours of my time. Ive been married for a year but started dating 7 years ago but for some reason I still have thoughts if we’re the right match or not, etc. I relive conversations in my head daily, about 4 months ago I was in a car accident cause I ran a stop sign and t-boned somebody, I was dazed out because I was reliving an argument with my mother in my head and once I realized I crashed I instantly thought I killed the other person, my husband had to reassure me multiple times that the other driver was okay. I’ve read up on rumination and that seems to be a big check mark for me… I could go on but based off the examples I provided do you guys believe I possibly have OCD and should seek treatment for it? I don’t want to offend anyone because I understand this is a very hard disorder to live with and there’s obviously different severity levels but I’ve wondered since I was child “what’s wrong with me” and I want to know if I’m finally figuring it out?

Struggling with scrupulosity around real events. It makes me want to kill myself. Some days I just feel the need to either be locked up or killed. I don’t want anyone to have to deal with me. I know there are people who love me and want me alive, but I can’t help but think it would make things better if I were dead. I thought about harming myself again after a few years of being clean. I don’t want to but I feel like I have to for the greater good. Like I’m being just by punishing myself for feeling like a bad person. I can’t stand myself. I want my life to feel like one worth living. People tell me to stop wasting my time and just be happy. They don’t know how hard that is. I wish people could see into my mind and see how much I’m struggling.

As a non-religious person who is coming out of a struggle with religious OCD, I’ve come to a conclusion that MANY are going to hate me for. I’m sorry, but I am saying the truth. All religions, but mainly focusing on Christianity, are just FILLED with mentally ill people. They will brainwash, gaslight, and guilt you into believing things that are immoral, cruel, strange, and terrifying. Being around Christians makes me feel uneasy because of how they think everything is a sign from god, how everything is demonic, and how they encourage scrupulosity when it is a MENTAL ILLNESS. I am sick and tired of pretending that most religious people are not mentally unstable. Before you say I am dumping on your religion, I would also like to recognize that Christians have also done a TON of good. This being volunteering, humanitarian work, etc. But if you are a Christian reading this you have got to see how there is so much mental illness in the faith. And the Bible is just FUEL for OCD. it’s all a huge compulsion. Try to get these people to step away from prayer or from going to Church and they will lose it. And if you are a Christian going to reply underneath this saying how great your faith is and how I just need to open my eyes, please save your breath. Your truth is not my truth, you don’t know any better about the truth than I do, stop pretending like you do. K, thanks.

Hi! I’m new here. I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD and Generalized + Social anxiety disorder. I’ve had sensory issues for my whole life, but I can generally control and overcome them. The one that is the most bothersome is being aware of my toenails. I’ve dealt with this since I was a child. It doesn’t have anything to do with the length or condition of my toenails at the time, but it’s just my brain becoming aware of the feeling of my toe nails. I also become aware of the feeling of my toes touching. When this happens I can usually move my brain past it. Until this week. 3 weeks ago I fell and broke my leg. I’ve been doing a lot of lying around and wiggling my toes. Well this past week, I’ve become aware of my toes touching (because of my cast- no worries- I stuffed tissue between them and moved on.) last night, my big toe nail stared rubbing my next toe, which triggered the awareness of my toenails. I trimmed my toes nails with no relief. This caused me to not sleep last night. This has become distressing to the point where I’m sobbing because of this. I’ve been googling this and how to get “over it” which just lead my toes sensory overload resources and solutions weren’t very applicable to what I was feeling. I finally came across Somatic OCD. AND BOY WAS I VALIDATED. I also realized it’s probably what’s causing me to be struggling with the feeling of my bladder. It constant feels full, I try to pee, and very little comes out. I’m pretty sure this is linked with my broken leg because of my in ability to get to the bathroom quickly without assistive devices. And, of course, since my fall I’ve been obsessively googling broken legs, recovery time, complications, personal experiences etc. I’ve always been anxious, so I just thought this was anxiety and overthinking. Anyway, this is long and rambling thank you for reading. I feel validated by finding this app and the article that helped me understand somatic OCD.

I’m worried bc feels like i’m not disgusted or scared enough by my thoughts, does this mean i want to do them? I feel like im becoming a psycho or something, and my brain keeps saying “that’s not bad so why are you worried about it” like wtf yes it is bad and i’m so tired of explaining why to it but like what if im losing my morals like im dizzy idk 😭