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Plus a person was assuming and triggering me by saying that the situation happened, or that I had malicious intent and felt guilty after... im so triggered rn...

Does anyone with HOCD ever get aroused by thoughts (aka testing the thoughts) when performing a sexual act and how did you work around that. It’s been running my life for a while!

Can testing for groinal responses cause them to happen? For example i will think of an intrusive thought in the past or create a fake scenario in my head and i will start to feel something down there every time. It’s it a learned response for the trama of this thoughts? Or i’m an actually a P. Dose anyone else experience this with POCD or should i look into get more help?

I don’t know why, but my ROCD is really loud right now. I’m obsessed with the idea of our relationship being “right”. Do I need to work on myself more before I can be in a good relationship? (My relationship is great by the way) Am I really going to commit to this person for the rest of my life? Is he holding me back? These are just a few of the questions I’m obsessed with right now. It’s so tiring and I just want to be able to enjoy my relationship for what it is. I’m feeling so sad and down. I’m trying not to search for reassurance but it’s also scary because I think “is this my OCD or is this real and true”. Any advice on how to help this. NOCD doesn’t take my insurance so I can’t go to therapy currently.

Im so depressed... and I feel alone... theres no hope... My pocd keeps saying that my worst fear of unknowingly cybering with a minor has actually happened and it's really triggering the hell out of me... I feel so horrible...My pocd keeps saying I "unknowingly erotically role played with a minor" when idek if this actually happened or not... this was nearly three years ago... (september of 2021) for context we were erotically role playing on an 18+ discord server, (she wasnt verified, but I assumed she was 18+ because we were on an 18+ place) and then she suddenly stopped responding, before leaving the server shortly after an unknown time... im so freaking anxious and scared... her grammar was fine at first, but then as we were going on, she kept making errors like "boxer" or "then" instead of "than"... my pocd keeps saying that I "UNKNOWINGLY EROTICALLY ROLEPLAYED WITH A MINOR" when idek if this happened or not... some people told me she sounds like/is a young adult... chatGPT tells me she sounded like a teenager... I genuinely dont know what to believe anymore... (these two photos are from her account, and the beginning of our ERP... I hope she wasnt a teenager... I really hope she wasnt...)

a few months back (i can’t remember exactly) i had just started the pill and i think the day after i started me and my bf at the time did it no protection. now i’m worried i might be pregnant because i keep feeling weird kicks in my guts. i already had taken like three different tests and they were all negative but i’m worried i did them wrong. please help. i looked it up on google and it said it was phantom kicks but even then i’m just not sure.

There's something weird about my groinals, it doesnt feel like a physicall response, I mean, I do have sensations, but that's not that part that worries me, it use to be, but what worries me most now is that feeling like I'm really enjoying what's going on, like I really don't care what my dick does (I do get a tingle, it's still not thw worst part) but my face gets all red and it feels like real desire

I know I've posted a lot and it's not for reassurance, just venting a lot I guess, I'm just so scared that i'll keep giving into these thoughts now, they calmed down a few hours ago but a new thought came, surprise surprise, the few days before now I've been dealing okay, and today I've been okay too, it's just when I got home from being out my brain started questioning if I had done the mental rituals right and it causes me so much anxiety, it makes me feel like I've been caught doing something I shouldn't, my ears go hot and I start feeling dizzy like scared and shock from the amount of anxiety my OCD gives me, ESPECIALLY when I'm done done with my thoughts like i don't want to look back at all, it's like "give me more attention 😈" like it's my master or something, it feels that way anyways, my head hurts a lot right now as well, since I got up fairly early this morning and I just want to go to bed, I'm so annoyed I don't even know how or why new thoughts came back, probably because I thought about them once and then started something going again, I'm so annoyed to say the least, I mean who wouldn't be. It's like these numbers and thoughts mean something when they really don't, I want to feel that feeling of carelessness again like I have other nights, but for now I need sleep, I just fear waking up with the thoughts as my conscious brain needs to actually calm down from the thoughts first so that I don't start worrying in the morning about blah blah blah adding or if I did stuff wrong, I need tips, it's pure ocd it's all in my head I don't do anything physical, just my brain being absolutely crazy, I told myself I was literally done like 8 hours ago, and I could've ignored my thoughts if I really tried but I gave in when I thought that I'd do really good today aswell, it's a little past midnight for me, but yeah the day that I have had. I could rant forever but yeah someone just help if you can lol, I don't know what to do anymore, one moment I'm like "this is so dumb why are you even doing this" then the next is "I need to finish this or I'll feel anxious forever" 🥱 it is tiring! it's like when a thought comes back like and ocd thought it's like I think of something I've already remembered or "done" then I add more to the thought, it's so confusing to explain honestly, I hope that it will calm down and that I can start fresh tomorrow without worrying, I've been good for the past few nights and now it comes again at the wrong time, when I'm especially tired and want to go to sleep, but with anxiety of being sure or unsure I can't do that so I'm just venting here because I feel it may help me and maybe others that they'll relate, maybe I shouldn't be too prideful when I realise my OCD is stupid and that I can actually control it, because in your head especially, it is far from easy to control. Anyways I will be going to bed soon hopefully, usually around this time my brain does give up but I'm just worried that might take longer because I've been doing compulsions more recent than other times, so I may have a slower OCD cooldown before I sleep, regardless I think me being this tired will just let me sleep, hopefully, goodnight everyone regardless, I will still probably be active but this will be my last post for tonight, also if anybody has read all of this thank you and I appreciate you for taking your time to read it all, stay strong guys, and goodnight 🤍

Agh! OCD is driving me crazy, like I can’t believe how great it is at making people feel horrible about themselves. So I am getting married to the love of my life in November and my ocd is trying to convince me I did something bad these past 5 years that will ruin my relationship. I know I haven’t done anything but it feels like I somehow forgot! Also, it’s bothering me about my past mistakes before him, my ocd is trying to convince me my fiancé is going to leave me because of all my past mistakes before him. Jeez! This feels soooo real it’s killing me!!!!

TRIGGER WARNING TALKS OF CANCER AND INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS ARE TALKED ABOUT. Hey everyone just kinda wanted something to vent to. Unfortunately my mom got diagnosed with cancer again and my intrusive thoughts centered around her when my harm ocd was bad. I feel so guilty and ashamed for these thoughts I almost feel like it’s triggering to be around her since the recent relapse in the ocd cycle. I just want to hug her and be there for her and tell her everything is gonna be ok. I start therapy again tomorrow which is good but I just feel really bad. Thanks to anyone that reads.

Hey everyone, looking for advice! Or just to talk about this.. I have suicidal ocd and have for awhile. I go to therapy for it. I am just scared that I am depressed and actually thinking about suicide as an option. I don’t want to be thinking about that. Sometimes the thoughts feel quieter so it tricks me. Anyone else deal with this? I get thoughts like “you don’t care about life, you don’t want to be here” blah blah. It feels like it’s trying to make me think I’m depressed.

Do any of you mix up dates and sometimes find that you stress if you did something whilst in a relationship which would result in you being a cheater I remember something from 6 years ago but my brain is saying it was 5 years ago or potentially overlapping when i met my now boyfriend but its not true, im sure of it - but the ocd wont let me be sure…. Hate this!! Anyone relate?

I know I love my boyfriend but I have this constant weight in my chest then I get anxious that I don’t actually love him. What can I do 😭😭 We almost broke up yesterday and I finally had some emotion to the fact of him leaving bc of my rocd. I lost it. I don’t want to lose him but I have no feelings towards him. I’m not excited, I am fearful. I’m scared. Please help me

I grew up very Catholic, but maybe that doesn’t matter here. How can I untangle from the thought that every coincidence is a “sign” from god or the universe? This has latched onto so many different areas of my life and now it’s on my daughters health/safety. Reading a story and there is a dead kid in it—must be a sign!! Getting a random name in my head and it’s someone who died—a sign of the worst to come!! Signs, jinxing, manifesting, etc. were always reinforced when I was growing up (and today in some cases too)—“it must be a sign!” Any ideas on how I can untangle from this?

Tight chest Hate it so uncomfortable

I've discovered recently that around a few hours after waking up my OCD and anxiety flares up and even when I'm "done" with a compulsion, it just keeps going regardless, because my brain is active and goes back to the thought and keeps adding. The different thoughts are spread out through different hours of the day, but in the morning I can resist, then more in the afternoon it's like I don't have the ability to resist anymore and the anxiety takes over, even if I'm out doing things. It always calms down when it's the next day in the early hours of the morning, the time I also feel the happiest or calmest too. If I "finish" a compulsion or ritual, which is a compulsion, or tell myself this is the time to stop, and wait around 1-3 hours the feeling wears off, but i still get scared I'll do it again which most times i don't do because the anxiety leaves, only at night tho when my brain gets tired. I don't go out a lot so that's the reason I think my brain is becoming more active, and maybe a bit too active. It's become manageable and predictable but obviously still irritating.

Has anyone lost interest in something they loved before intrusive thoughts? I like romance books so much, escaping my world and thinking of someone's else's,reading romance stories... After my intrusive thoughts,my books became a trigger to them and I have stopped reading two months now,I tried to pick it up again but I'm not in the mood,I really miss it

Sometimes i feel like i need the opinion from people online to tell me if im a good person or not. I have thoughts of just posting every single bad thing ive done and let the people decide if i deserve to continue with my life. It sounds morbid but it is. I dont know what to do with myself sometimes especially when it comes to the future. What will people want to happen to me if they found out everything ive done. I put too much thought into these scenarios. Its really just how i feel. Maybe this has turned into more of a vent but- i also think that i should not continue my life myself, so that i dont have to see the “ inevitable” comments on my life later on. I think about it all the time. Its gotten so bad to where i feel like i need to be put away in a mental hospital for a week or two so i can get over myself but i havent and im scared too if it gets bad again. I just feel so unworthy of living sometimes. I want it all to stop but its so hard most days.

For those that know what I'm talking about, looking for advise. I have bad ocd, and always chasing my 'right mindset', whether it's driving around, or tapping my foot, or whatever the frig I do. Is it better for me to start my first therapy session in my 'happy mindset', or start it in my miserable, in need to do a compultion state of mind

Can someone break down what is rumination and how to stop it pls?