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I’m so scared I’m not going to make it to heaven what if I’ve made too many mistakes in my life .. I’m afraid of the unknown what if the rapture happens soon

I know that God is good and loving. He has proven it to me so many times. But recently a video came on my for you page and it was kinda blasphemous. It was basically making fun of some pastor in a church. But I found it really funny. I knew that it was disrespectful to God. I wasn’t laughing at the fact that it disrespectful to God. I was laughing because the pastor was doing something out of the ordinary. but now im scared that He’s gonna punish me with one of my worst fears that OCD has been revolving around. I just think back to some of the punishments that He gave in the Bible, and im scared that im gonna get punished in the worst way.

OCD is being mean again recently. If I come across a video of someone who has cancer, or some kind of ailment, I have to watch it with so much focus, read every caption perfectly, or I feel like I’ll get the same cancer or ailment. Totally irrational. I know. I keep telling myself so. Yet I can’t help but give into these compulsions. Because I know they’re compulsions, and I know it’s OCD. But there’s still a “what if” flicker in my head. “What if this feeling actually a warning and not OCD this time.” Part of it is my scrupulosity OCD. I feel like God is going to punish me for “not being compassionate” Or empathy, or caring enough by giving me the same ailment I ignored. Like a religious karma. And I’d like to say I KNOW for a fact God won’t do that, but OCD makes me believe other wise. What’s your experiences with this, even if it’s not religion OCD related.

Since the start of the year i had been feeling guilty for being in a relationship with someone of the same sex. I wouldn’t specify my religion but being gay is considered natural but acting upon it isnt allowed. The guilt and the thought were so strong that I eventually ended a 2 year relationship. I didnt want to tho but i do believe in my faith strongly and even tho i do question why something isn’t allowed, i do believe that if it isnt, it isnt for a reason. I had that reason too, i was mentally drained because of that relation, it messed my head in ways nothing ever will. But that never pushed me to end it

I’m struggling tonight. I seen something Instagram about a manifestation/karma and I responded to it, I looked on the profile after responding to it and one post it said black magic spells. I’m now having a really hard time that I’ve done something bad and I’ve messed with black magic.. I deleted the response and blocked the user, but my anxiety is through the roof stuff like that scares me and I’m crying. I’m so scared right now that something bad is going to happen 😢😢

Hi everyone ! I have been diagnosed with pure, somatic and harm OCD since last year as well as dermatillomania. Oh ! And to top it off I have diagnosed ADHD as well. I wanted to just come on here and share some experience that I’ve had. I’m 23 years old and ever since I was a child I have memories of my dermatillomania as a way to cope with my anxiety. I have struggled with my mental health since being a child, my undiagnosed ADHD made me very self aware that I wasn’t “fast enough”, “smart enough”, or “cool enough”. My psychiatrist even says that this undiagnosed ADHD until my 20s probably exacerbated my ocd as a way to compensate. Now I still rely on my parents as they help me out while I finish my studies. One parent is very religious and believes that “disease does not exist” (only a projection in peoples minds), and is very against meds and my other parent seems to always want to change the subject and has refused to come into therapy with me to meet my doctors and understand what I live through. My religious parent, I refuse to tell them I am on medication and I know that they will disapprove and try to gaslight me into believing something that will “make it all go away”. So I’ve given up. My other parent although they appear to pay attention always changes the subject and makes me feel invalid, and no matter how many times I try to explain I feel like I am talking to a wall. I just feel sad because.. well you would want your parents to want to understand and help you. In my case I am fortunate that financially they back me but I feel like I need to be a different person around them, and when it comes to my mental health I have no support. I look at mostly white families (not all) online and they seem to want to understand and be a part of a healing process, or at least believe that OCD is a valid diagnosis. I just want to ask if any of you have had unsupportive family members, have felt alone on your journey, and if it’s okay to never really let go of that hope that one day they may understand you. And honestly advice is great but just knowing I’m not alone in this will already comfort me, knowing that we are all in this together.

So my theme has revolved around the fear of having schizophrenia for about a year now, many therapist and mental health professionals told me they believe it’s a mix of ocd and hypochondria. Well my main symptom of this disorder is the fear of having delusions, so over the course of this year I’ve had thoughts ranging from “what if my wife is a demon” “what if this song means something” “what if there’s some hidden message in this movie” “what if the government created the world and controls everything” “what if Satan is the true creator of the world” “why did my cat look at me like that, what if he’s a spy created by the government, what if all animals are?” Literally crazy shit but it all feels so real, I’ve thought about this stuff so much that I’ve started to have almost an emotional detachment from the world around me, I’ll have thoughts like, “why should I care, nothings real anyway”. And now it’s starting to feel like my normal line of thinking, like now I genuinely feel like everything is fake or staged in some way, nothing feels real or genuine, it feels like everyone around me, the media, news, politics, all feels like some sort of big act or lie. Feels like there’s something more to reality that I’m missing or something, everything feels “too perfect”. I’ve lost all happiness in everything and I’ve become SO suspicious of every single thing, everything has to have some deeper meaning according to my brain, it sucks. Has anyone ever had the fear of schizophrenia and it got this bad?

Is it possible for your ancestors to curse you??? I keep getting intrusive thoughts about my relative that passed away and my thoughts are saying that they’re gonna curse me with one of my biggest fears. I’m so terrified right now. What if these thoughts were to actually come true..??!!!

Sooo.. for 7 years i havent worried about demons magic and other evil things.. because i prayed, and told my self. God is protecting me because og my prayers. And that worked very good. But my ocd just jumped to everything else in the religion like ocd do. 7 years of hell. Off all the things that ocd attacked in my religion from everything about sinning to perfect in prayer etc. I Got sick off all the stress. I then learned that prayer is a compulsion and that i have to face my darkest fear. Which is not to pray and face the possibility to get possed and attacked by evil. I Got the balls to do it. And i still beleive god Will protect me even if i dont pray. But. I worry if it Will work ore not. That i just should not Care if i get possesed ore not. To be honest i dont Care anymore.. But im afraid that it wont work this method. So i gues its the fear of fear.. what are u guys experience with this?

Does anyone here struggle with moral scrupulosity OCD? It’s been a lonely journey dealing with intrusive thoughts about being seen as good or bad (aka a failure in my brain), especially dealing with being a lesbian in a very Christian household. Just want someone to talk to.

Hi everyone. Has anyone's OCD skyrocketed after an abusive relationship and/or after having children? I've always had some version of OCD but two years ago in February of 2022, I experienced this really horrible bout of DPDR. I lost my sense of self, I was having really strange spiritual thoughts or existential thoughts. I was in an abusive relationship at the time. I'm still recovering from that. But my OCD jumps around. Today, I was worried I was having a brain aneurysm because of a mild headache and because I'm prescribed Lexapro for my depression/anxiety and a low dose of adderall for my adhd. I've been on these meds for a while with no issues but I am now getting thoughts like," maybe I'll have a stroke or an aneurysm from my meds." With no reason to think so. And then I spend hours googling. The health anxiety and death anxiety are fueled by a fear of my kids being without a mother (I'm a single mother.) in some ways, the fear has helped me to make healthier choices but these thoughts of death and the million things that can cause it are taking away from the joy of living. The DPDR seemed to kick this off. Does it ever get better? I exercise, meditate, pray, talk therapy, I just want to feel like "me" again.

I often notice that i get into this rabbit hole, that i feel like what i have is a temptation and not just ocd. I feel that i label everything as ocd while i can have temptation too. Recently i was dealing with sexual thoughts and i said its ocd but at the same time i acted on ways that it seemed like its not ocd, its temptation. It scares me cause then when i have agressive harm thoughts or any intrusive thought, it might be temptation. Or when i dealt with this sexual problem, i had really bad feelings same as pocd, and now im questioning if it was temptation or not. How do you know if its temptation or ocd? For me tenptation is like when you fight to not do something but you are in danger doing it. Ocd is different. Maybe im afraid of it cause i watched alot of christian videos and everybody is talking about temptation, it makes me scared now that these thoughts/feelings were temptations but the same time i feel like im arrogant if i say its ocd and i cant have temptation...

I have been struggling for years with overwhelming and disturbing thoughts ever since I was as young as 5/6 (after one of many traumatic events). After said incident, it had left me with severe separation anxiety which had eventually made me develop a major skin picking issue that still affects me today. I have very violent and sexual thoughts out of nowhere but with some distraction I can get them out of my head. I think about doing things I have no desire to do AT ALL because it’s morally incorrect and downright disgusting. (Mentions of suicide)…but sometimes when I become embarrassed I picture myself committing suicide but I have no interest in dying nor do i have the desire to die. I hate to admit it but I become obsessed with individuals as well, (friends, potential partners and celebrities). I tend to become very obsessed and attached to individuals or ideas that I have interest in and I become extremely invested in and that’s all that’s on my mind for weeks and even months. (I know it sounds silly but I was obsessed with Batman for 3 years straight) it was all my mind was set on. I very often think about the afterlife and what I need to do to rest peacefully, it sometimes consumes me for hours or I wondering if I’m upsetting god. There’s much more I have to say but it’s already long enough, I’m just looking for advice to deal with this because I don’t know what’s going on with me and I hope I can have some helpful suggestions or insight, thank you! :)

Hi ya’all. I’m a Christian with Scrupulosity. I’ve been struggling with lust lately, and it’s been wreaking havoc on my scrupulocity. I get all excited and think it will be fine in the moment, but then I get severely anxious later, to the point where I’m terrified that I’ll go to hell or damage my relationship with God. I struggle to control myself around my boyfriend who I adore, but every time I’m intimate with him, I’m overcome with anxiety about God forgiving me. How do other folks with Scrupulosity handle sin?

anyone else wake up and instantly have bad thoughts about God? it makes me sick and i have gotten so tired of fighting these thoughts that I just kinda don’t anymore but somehow that only makes me feel worse… like i want these thoughts or something. I can’t win

I’m literally so scared right now I’m calm for a while then I start back up again having anxiety.me and this man did sexual things together but no intercourse.I was on TikTok and this lady talked about how God is warning his women to stop talking to a guy and giving warnings out that you could catch HIV,the man will unalive you and hurt you etc.I immediately feared I have HIV because I did things against Gods word.I’m so terrified and then I kept looking up the Symptoms of HIV but at the same time I know I don’t have it.I feared this before around the beginning of this year but the fear is back again.please help me.this is my first time doing sexual things (no intercourse) with a man.I’m still a virgin I’m just scared.I really trust God

I have alot of problems with this, this has been my main obsessions. The biggest trigger for me is this bible verse: “whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is a sin” (James4:17) Alot of times I feel like what i do is a sin, joking or laughing at something, but then i feel angry cause i cant enjoy my life and i always criticize myself that what i do is sin, but maybe im just legalistic, and maybe its not a sin, but then i feel like im just trying to talk myself into continuing the sin. I feel like im really a fraud, cause i talk myself into thinking im not sinned. Then this verse comes in my mind and i feel worse. So i tell you what happened now. Someone in my workplace came to me and asked if i have credit card to send him money and he will give me the money in cash, and basically lied and said no i dont have, i dont use my credit card. Then i felt really bad that im a sinner and i dont help others, im selfish, I knew i shouldve helped but i decided to not and im a bad person for that. For me i had an explanation why i lied. I use my credit card to save money, i really dont like spendig that money, or even if i do i know how much i spend, every month i know how much money i will spend take out from there. Sometimes i let myself spend more like this month, but im really sensitive about this, cause i want to buy a car and i know if i will spend money i will not have that car as soon as i want. So if i have cash, i know i will spend that, i wont save that cause i use my credit card for that, so i dont want to take out money from my credit card to get cash cause i will spend that cash. And i have a story to, cause this happened before with another person, i gave him money from my credit card, he gave me cash, and the next day, he came again, and the third day be came again. So 3 times i took out money from my card and i got cash, some would say you shouldve saved that cash, but things happened and i had to spend that money... i know myself, if i dont have cash then i know i wont spend money, but if i have then i will spend it. Credit card is for saving money and sometimes spending it but i have a limit, and cash is for spendig it. But i feel like im just selfish that i lied and i didnt helped him, i feel like im a bad person for that. This was just an exemple but everyday i battle with this, did i commit a sin, i feel like i did, or i feel like what im doing is a sin, but i still contonue it and i feel bad cause of this bible verse...

Many times i feel like ocd is just a label that i use for anything and even real problems. The idea that we just ignore everything and dont think about it is not possible cause if you have a problem and that problem generates thoughts and feelings, you have to work on it. Cause how do you know if thats ocd or not? We say we dont try to figure it out, but if its generated because of a real problem, how we know if its something we leave there or we have to work on it. I will give you many exemples, my problem is now with my sexual needs. It got strong cause one day i just lost control and i engaged in some sexual thoughts and that made the sexual need stronger. So this is a real problem right? Its clear that i have to work on it, now i noticed that the sexual need got to a point where it gave me feelings about things that are really bad, basically what pocd is about, and you can say its ocd, but i have a real problem which is repressed sexual needs, and how do i know that it didnt got that bad that it gives me those feelings? Its easy to say its ocd cause i dont like it but i heard stories that there were some who didnt wanted to do it but still did it to relase the feeling. Another exemple, i say i have harm ocd and suicidal ocd, but what i experienced now was what i read before about suicidal people, i got angry at my family, i felt like i dont get attention, so i had thoughts aboit something bad happening to me so than i would get attention. It even jumped in my mind when i was so angry that if i would die they would feel bad now that they didnt gave me attention, and these are very similar to people who do self harm to get attention. When i shared this to my therapist she said im like these people, cause i want attention. Maybe the attention part is true, but i dont want to harm myself to get attention... Many times these suicidal, self harm thoughts are very similar to real suicidal thoughts, cause the whole situation is like its actually real cause im angry or im sad because of something, i feel a little hopeless for a second and because all these situations i cant say its just ocd, ignore it... For me its like there are signs that might show that these are actually real feelings and thoughts and then i spin over it. And about religious ocd, i spin about sin, we all have sins and we will never be free from them, so when i sin i feel shame and sometimes i dont know if its real sin or ocd, but i just cant say its ocd when i know i have a sin battle, but then accepting that i did sin just makes me tired mentally cause this is happening alot now...

I’m just feeling so freaking upset. I’m constantly having to talk myself down from panic attacks and self-sabotage. I’ve suffered with the same theme(s) for YEARS at this point and I’m just done I’m just so sick of it. And, I’m so freaking scared for when me and my boyfriend get married and have children because I want children so bad but I can’t even be off my meds for a week let alone 9+ months (my medication can’t be taken during pregnancy). I’m also scared because I feel awful that my boyfriend will be “stuck” with me once we get married. My OCD wants me to confess my innermost (obsessive) thoughts and feelings to him. Reality is blurred, when I have these flare-ups I’m sick to my stomach worried I may have done something bad and I’m constantly ruminating on whether I did or not. I just want this feeling to leave, and knowing that this is a persistent theme that I may deal with for a much longer time just makes me want to cry. I’m so afraid of hurting my boyfriend or having already hurt him, and it’s the same with everyone else in my life. And, I am Catholic, and the sacrament of confession for me gives me so many mixed emotions because it’s healing for me but at the same time I have to be so careful of what I say so I don’t start confessing as a compulsion, but then afterwards my OCD tells me I’m just not confessing because I’m guilty and I know it. I’m so so sick of this. I didn’t sleep last night and I can tell I’m tired physically but emotionally I’m too anxious to rest so I took some Benadryl and maybe it’ll help me fall asleep. But I just maybe need someone to talk to on this post.

I hate saying this, but I’m extremely sad. I sit in my chair and dissociate. It’s hard for me to confess my feelings. I truly feel empty. OCD makes life so much harder to live…it really does:( along with that I have 4 other things to deal with mentally. I am Christian, but other Christian friends have excluded me. The only one I had to call for awhile was 988. People have disappointed me, and I’m aware that God will never fail. But I’m at the point in my life where I’m craving a romantic relationship, but it eats at me everyday. Love is a painful ideal. I found a celebrity that I’m attracted to, and I don’t know if anyone else has experienced this, but it actually eats at me. Like I hate it sometimes. He is married. I saw the picture, and though I know rationally that he is a celebrity…it really hurts. I am not delusional…and I don’t know why this is:/ I cut out everything he is on, because I get depressed when I see him. Though I rationally know God was with me in my darkest moments…most times people weren’t. I just want someone who chooses to listen to me. It sucks. And this is my last effort to be heard. I give up. It took a lot for me to write this. I will definitely be deleting, but I am so lonely. God bless you all🙂 Romans 8:29 Jeremiah 29: 11❤️❤️🫂