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the NOCD Community

Nothing can shake off the guilt. I don’t start therapy for a couple weeks. I’m almost non functional, what can I do

Does anyone else’s ocd tell them their kid is ugly and it feels like maybe I really think that?! Like. Ugh. I just was so in love with my other two and now I feel bipolar bc I don’t love my kids like that anymore 😭 I do my best to be the same loving mom but my mind says all kinds of negative things to me now.

I feel like I am doomed and I am so afraid of the next bad thing coming to me. I feel like I’ve been through so much trauma in life already and I don’t want more of it but I know that it will still come. That is life. I feel so overwhelmed right now. I want a break. I tried all weekend to make myself feel safe but today has sucked mentally. Now I have to jump back into the workweek tomorrow and put a smile on my face and pretend like I am “normal” when inside I am crying like a baby and scared of what bad stuff is going to come to me next.

I feel so weird and dumb right now, but my brother just moved back into town and needed a place for his things. His “things” meaning a dresser and bed. Well turned out to be a lot more than two things. My anxiety started racing, I could feel my body tense up, I couldn’t catch my breath. Now everything he has brought from “outside” (from his old apartment/ from touching the inside of the dirty y-haul) to inside my clean room. Now I’m freaking out that everything is contaminated. They put it in the bedroom I don’t use, except to store my extra “things”. Now his things are touching my things that I have left in that room as storage. I don’t know how to get out of my head that his “things” are contaminating mine??? Now it makes me not want to use that room.

I get thoughts a lot that say people are attractive or not attractive, some of my compulsions are “checking” to make sure I don’t find them attractive or see if my thoughts are actually true… I know that doesn’t help ocd at all - I get that, but cmon you’ve all done compulsions before that’s a part of our disease. All I’m asking is if anyone else does these compulsions but hates doing it, it’s just because of fear or sometimes disgust that you’re having those thoughts - mind you I do understand it’s okay to find people attractive in a relationship, but my thoughts that pop up are alot to do with past people or people I just don’t want to think about. And sometimes when I have seen a look alike actor to one of those people it’ll start saying you find them hot, good looking, etc… when I confessed to my partner he told me just not to do that, like the checking stuff and analysing… so that makes me feel even more anxious and feel like I’m hyper focused on it now, like trying not to do it but when the thoughts come in I feel like I automatically try and reassure myself. I guess I’m asking if this is me doing something betraying to my partner or if it’s actually a compulsion and I know I should avoid any compulsions… but I don’t want to feel, on top of doing compulsions that I’m actually betraying my boyfriend, because he doesn’t understand some compulsions and probably thinks well why can’t you just not do that compulsion cause it makes him uncomfortable, and so now I just feel like if I do any checking compulsion I’m actually betraying him. :(

I’ve been struggling with myself when I tell myself not to worry so much, I feel like the second I stop worrying or thinking about my loved ones, something bad is going to happen to them. It drains my energy and I feel like I am always walking on eggshells because In my head my thoughts tell me my decisions and actions will affect my families well being. It’s a lot of responsibility to put on myself and I try telling myself no amount of worrying will change anything but the thoughts keep coming back. Does anyone relate and can share any thoughts?

I feel like my ocd has manifested in picking my skin. For the last few years of my skin doesn’t feel smooth, i pick it. This has led to infections and scars that are embarrassing. What are some things i can do?

Anyone else suffering from guilt and shame from sexual things they did as a kid when they didn’t know any better. And if so how do you cope with it I really need help thx

I need tips on how to sit here, wanting to confess, but I can’t. It’s like torture. How do y’all deal w this????

If I am living in the moment, I’m good. As soon as I realize I’m doing well I get hammered with instrusive thoughts. It’s like OCD says…not so fast. Don’t forget about me. I know to just accept the thoughts and move on. Has anyone else experienced this?

I have intrusive thoughts everyday I feel like there making me crazy does any one have any tips on handling them .

Hello there, i always dreamed to get instantly rich so that i did not have to meet and deal with people in my life, i always dreamed to be rich and be able to live alone for the rest of my life. The idea of making friends/finding soulmate terrifies me , i always try to hide it to the public and try to make it look like i want people to meet, but in reality i am horrified at the idea. That i will meet someone that cares about its own feelings only and never feeling anything about my feelings and emotions , to be backstabbed, to be betrayed , to be hurt by that someone. I had past negative experiene both with my parents and with people, i am always afraid "that group of friends will drag me back to that bad company". I also feel weird and a sense of inferiority around people of my same gender , because i know they are better then me, always the need to compare, and i can't stand it. I don't want to be around people , they only give me negative feelings and the fear that something bad may/will happen to me. I prefer to be left alone . I want a life of solitude and only to be focusing at my own plan of self growth that i built for myself. Sharing that with someone makes me feel rather unwell , i am a very private person, i don't like to share my life with somebody else , that is not me. I don't want people to disrupt or ruin my life .

Has anyone else had thought where you feel like you're constantly upsetting the other person? I truly want my life back.. I feel like im going crazy quite honestly, but also, any thoughts of jealousy for no reason? Even tho you know for a fact no one would cross or cheat on you ?

does anyone else feel their ocd gets so much worse at night or even when it gets dark?

Thoughts on staying away/limiting time on social media. I know it’s toxic and not helping but is that just because it triggers me? Should I keep it as a exposure ?

hi everyone, im new to this therapy & it has been really daunting leading up to getting help. I’ve been struggling immensely with emetophobia for my whole life, but it has taken a huge toll on my life within the last year and a half. my emetophobia has progressively transitioned into agoraphobia and I can’t ever leave my room. just this last day was my last straw, when my roommate came home with the norovirus. he’s not very considerate when it comes to staying clean and quarantining so my head has been spiraling wondering when or if I’ll get it too. i haven’t slept in 3 days & haven’t eaten & I feel that im inducing more harm to myself. I just want to feel better, not worry so intensely. I want to live a normal life without restricting my meals or restricting public places & constantly asking my boyfriend for unfortunate reassurance that I’ll be okay. I really hate to be that girlfriend. if anyone sees this, I really hope that I do get better & that if anyone struggling with the same obstacle as me can get through it. it’s draining, it’s daunting, & so much for one to handle.

I was just wondering can OCD switch between two specific themes. Recently my theme had changed from false memories (reassurance) to obsessing over news(Russia and the potential draft) and now it has switched back to my original theme while the new one is still subtext in my mind. Is this common and does anyone have any advice (I’m seeking out NHS talk therapies as don’t have the money for anything else)

4 years ago I had hocd with a girl classmate, I was scared of being gay and like her, not so long ago my ocd came back, that thought came back and then changed to another girl, now AGAIN came back, because he changed her style and now have glasses, I can accept she looks pretty, but it started when I was scared of my boyfriend falling in love with her, now I think about her constantly like, having the need to be better than her, I hate this I don't have life, it started today because I dreamed about her chasing my bf.. I want my bf to see that I am in fact prettier and better than her but then, my hocd just comes and tells me it's me who is in love and in denial.. I hate this, I love my boyfriend, I'm not gay and I don't like her.. help does someone knows what's happening???!!?

I feel so down right now for no reason and I feel guilty feeling bad about my well-being because some peace are dealing with wars and cancer and my pain isn't half or real compared to their pain but I can't take it anymore and I feel uncomfortable going to therapy and my family is broken my dad is abusive and mom and brothers don't really care I don't have any friends that they could help but OCD getting me crazy by signs I think I am seeing and I can't get help cuz my ocd tells me if I find happiness something bad may happen to my family so this is why I can't find a solution sorry for the long post I just feel so lonely right now I just want to fade away

Hi, I always get thoughts whenever I see or get any type of interaction with certain type of people that I will turn into them and it gives me alot of anxiety and has to do compulsions to get out of those thoughts. If I try to avoid the compulsions I get their faces, The expressions on their faces. It's not just if I see them, There faces comes anytime, While I am eating, Studying, Walking. Please give some advices on what I can do. As I don't know what to do.