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intrusive thoughts have gotten kinda bad again after a few months of control. i think i might spiral over something again, how do i prevent it? i can’t go through this again i won’t make it😭

Hiii :) I feel like I come on here and type stuff out all the time , but this one is about my Rocd. I have had a difficult time in my relationship more than once with Rocd and this time my brain is saying “maybe this keeps happening because he truly isn’t the one”. When I have said multiple times to my mom and family that he’s the one I’m going to marry. My first ocd attack in this relationship was back in may/June of 2023. Our one year anniversary was on February 25th :), everything was fine , my mindset was fine , our relationship was healthy. I have been going to therapy so my self esteem and confidence has gotten a lot better and apparently that changed my behavior in my relationship, to a point where now my boyfriend is overthinking and feeling afraid that I will find someone better than him because I now think highly of myself. Which I do not judge him for it, I was once in his position. My therapist said something about how it’s either I’m losing interest in him or I feel secure with him and that’s why I’m acting differently. Which I think was my first trigger , then my friends called me up soon after my therapy appointment and said “forget the boyfriend and come move back home we miss you” because I moved to Florida to be closer to my boyfriend. I love my boyfriend more than anything and even typing this out now my brain is like “do you? “. “But you feel nothing”. I feel like there is a wall between me and reality right now and every time I am with my boyfriend I try so hard to feel something that I feel nothing, I have gone numb. I don’t have a sex drive , I don’t feel butterflies, I question if I’m attracted to him, every time I look at him I try really hard to feel infatuated with him and I feel nothing. This numbness came out of nowhere and it’s making me so frustrated and depressed and I do not know what to do. I struggled with Rocd in my past relationships but the guys I were with couldn’t handle it so we ended. This is the first guy to stick around. So if I had stayed with those other guys would it have kept happening in those relationships too? Or is the guy I’m with really not the one? I feel so stressed and defeated and all I want is for things to go back to the way they were last week when it brain wasn’t being like this :/ Of course I love my partner , so why do I feel so numb with him and why am I not having panic attacks like I used to whenever Rocd hit. Am I not panicking because I truly don’t care? The stress is so depressing.

I’ve decided to take a bunch of OCD quizzes to see how bad my scores are. It’s kinda fun

Hi guys :) I am 21 now, but at 14 I read an article about a woman discovering she wanted to become a man and not realizing it until later in life, which prompted the worst OCD I have ever had. I was paralyzed with anxiety and depression over the potential of becoming a man. I am a woman, I love being a woman, and I identify with being a woman through and through. I thought experiencing trans OCD was behind me, and recently (I just switched from Prozac to Lexapro; I have been on Prozac since I was 16, so maybe that’s a trigger?) it came back. I desperately want it to go away. I feel helpless. I just want someone to tell me it isn’t real, but I know that’s reassurance

i had a thought last night that was like “what if my parents aren’t my parents” that was all it was i’m not sure in what way, but i know it’s not like what if im adopted kinda way like existential it was more in a paranoia way? anyway ive been dealing with a psychosis/schizophrenia theme lately and i think this stemmed from that but idk and earlier i was just like questioning if this thought is a delusion/paranoia. but now i feel like im actually questioning the thought ? and im freaked out now but idk if im freaked about the thought itself (like are my parents real) or about the fear that it could be paranoia/delusion. someone please help me out here

Why tho i get sexual images of my family members with my friends and random people , with ocd is this and why and how i recover

So every-time I get intrusive thoughts It triggers automatic anxiety and then I feel so anxious. How do you guys just “sit with the feelings” the thoughts bring when it feels so uncomfortable and like something bad is about to happen?

I was doing really well until yesterday, where the goalpost was moved and my grounding and mindfulness exercises werent working. I eventually lapsed in a panic attack in the middle of the night. Today i just feel like im wasting away, my body is weak, i feel sick, I cant summon any motivation. I havent really given in to my thoughts, but i really dont have the energy to care rn.

Anyone have trouble with leaving the home (aka your safe space)? I’m so worried that I’ll have heart palpitations in public, which might trigger me to panic, and then all the catastrophic what if situations might happen. It’s been tough feeling like I can be normal and live life lately.

I can’t be helped, from making mistakes to what I’ve think I’ve done, I don’t even care what happens to me anymore I guess my brain and memories are the truth so I should be locked up for a while with rape as I think I done it intoxicated

Ok so a couple of days ago I went to the mall after school and while on my way a little girl walked on the sidewalk on the other side of the road. I immediately started to kind of panic. At some point I didn’t see her anymore bc she walked into the opposite direction. I also had people behind me and some people in front of me. And I KNOW I walked only on my sidewalk bc I obviously didn’t want to do anything and I remember that I didn’t do anything. But now I’m doubting that. Even tho I know I didn’t even cross the road. And people were behind me.

Hey all! My therapist recently recommended that I ask my psych about Prozac for my OCD. I was wondering what are some common medications you guys have been on? I know it’s always a mixed bag but I just wanted some perspective. Thank you!

My boyfriend (2.5 years) said something extremely cruel during an argument and hours later after he apologized and we took space from each other I was able to get over it quickly and be back to normal and that scares me. I’m afraid I should break up with him because what he said was really bad but I don’t want to and that would mean all my rocd fears are true basically. He is usually very sweet and loving but he has said very hurtful things during arguments and couple of times.

I hate this OCD stuff. I have been out of work for over a year because OCD has taken over my life. I need to return to work in two weeks, and I don't think I'm going to be able to. I just started woth NOCD about 4 weeks ago, and I'm sure this will help me, but I'm just not there yet, and I'm stressing. And the more I feel stressed by this stuff, the more the little OCD stuff affects me too. My leg just bumped my computer keyboard, and now I want to change my pants. I intensely hate this. This sucks.

hi yall so my theme kinda jumped from harm to fear of schizophrenia. and i saw a scene from greys anatomy of a paranoid schizophrenic and ever since i feel like ive had intrusive thoughts pop up that sound like paranoia. last night i had “what if my parents aren’t actually my parents” and so then im like am i paranoid? am i experiencing psychosis or schizophrenia? do i believe that thought? then it combines with my harm theme and there’s this fear that i am going into some kind of psychosis thing and the paranoid thoughts are gonna make me harm someone. so i have intrusive images of that happening anyone have anything similar? please answer if you have and how to deal

This is all probably tmi, but I’m struggling quite a bit so please bear with me. I recently cut back/quit watching mainstream porn, but the other day I was searching for a certain scene from the movie “X” to use as a… replacement. (Mia Goth is one of my biggest celebrity crushes, and I was just trying to explore alternatives to traditional porn 🤦‍♀️) While looking for this, I stumbled upon an explicit scene of hers from the movie “Nymphomaniac” that I used instead. I’ve never seen this movie, so I was incredibly disgusted when I found out afterward that she was 18/19 when filming this movie and that her character in the movie is SUPPOSED TO BE 15. I’m 24, so needless to say, I was a bit horrified. I had no idea she was so young in this (or that the character she played was underage), and I feel sick that I used this to pleasure myself. None of this crossed my mind beforehand considering it was a pretty explicit scene in a mainstream film. I assumed she was around my age. Even though she was technically an adult while filming this, she was still far to young for me personally and I feel deeply ashamed. This event has triggered memories from the ages 18-22 (I worry even 23) where I would search the “teen” category (18-19) on porn websites. I feel disgusting for looking at this stuff once I got out of my teen years, and even though I stopped, I feel dirty and predatory for doing this in my early 20s. Before I took a hiatus from watching this content this year, I would only watch things where I could tell the actors were my age or older. But the past is haunting me. And I just feel so gross. I should have stuck with the scene from the movie I was searching for (because she was 28/29 in that and I KNEW that), or I shouldn’t have watched anything at all. Hell, typing this out is starting to make me obsess over whether I’m disgusting or not for doing this to something that wasn’t really intended to be “porn”. I feel like I’ve violated this actress by using this film for something it wasn’t really intended for. I know I should quit all of this entirely, but my medication makes it incredibly difficult to “perform”, and imagination alone just doesn’t work for me. I’m just so frustrated and everything I do makes me hate myself more. I’m sorry for the graphic nature of this post. I was just wondering if anyone could relate or give me some advice.

Hi guys I wanna say something…if anyone relates please advice me. Recently I’ve getting a lot of attention from guys (outside) and I’m in a relationship. So basically before rocd hit me I swear I never craved for attention like I’m doing these days and it’s just not feeling right. I feel that it’s against me my rules my values. Why am k running after attention and I’m liking it whenever I get the attention, I swear earlier I wouldn’t even care about it….my partner was all enough…now I’m questioning myself why?! Am I liking it. Do I like the person or the attention I’m getting from the person and one incident happened which made me feel like I should really stay in my boundaries and I feared loosing my partner. It not like I’m doing something unethical but it’s all making me feel like I’m a betrayer cheater and not loyal. And then today it made me question again do I not love my partner? I swear guys it’s getting heavy on me and definitely causing me anxiety and making me feel like kl never be able to become a good partner if I keep on going like this. I WAS NOT LIKE THIS , THIS ALL DOESNT MAKE ME FEEL LIKE ME! Does ocd has a part in it? What should I do because I think I’ll be ruining my relationship by going on like this. (Anxious) I feel like moving away because I’m not able to handle anything. Pls help me.

Sorry I couldn't think of a better title lol. I gotta ask this though. Is there any one here thats older (35 up, I'm 43) that has developed a new theme? If so what is or was the theme and how did you deal with it?

Does anyone have trouble with anticipatory anxiety especially with physical sensations? I constantly find myself worried about “what if my heart palpitations happen again?”… It’s pretty consuming when I’m stuck ruminating about it and causes me to lose focus on the present.

anytime i describe how i’m feeling or who i am as a person, i physically feel like i’m lying. for example, i clearly am anxious over these thoughts, but saying that i’m scared feels like i’m lying. or when someone says “you are not your thoughts” it feels like i’m upset or don’t want that to be true because i want to act on them. like it’s making me feel like the only way out is to do them. but then i think back to when these began, the idea of actually committing such acts made me absolutely terrified as a child. i couldn’t even imagine why i was thinking those things. why does it feel like the opposite now? i just feel like my morals have completely flipped and no matter how much i try and find an answer to it, i never can.