Kickstart your recovery journey with a caring community of others
working to conquer OCD
Is this to be expected?? I feel anxious for hours after ERP sessions. I also have panic disorder so that may be why . Any advice for beginning ERP? I just had my 3rd session today. What to expect?
ROCD is so painful because I can feel sick to my stomach/worried about my relationship fading out and have no idea if it’s my OCD or the actual relationship. If you have OCD -can you just assume all of this is anxiety and ignore it? I feel like I want someone/something to tell me everything is okay and I can ignore all these feelings (seeking reassurance) but also everything in the media/comarisons makes me think these feelings wouldn’t happen if I was with my true love. The ‘trust your gut’ advice is SO triggering to me because my gut generally always doubts/questions my relationship. And also can I have gut feelings that something is wrong but still be with my true love partner?
I’m so confused right now. I know that no one is ever perfect, and I really want to grow and deepen my relationship with my bf, I don’t want anyone else. I care so much about him and I feel safe with him. But Im worried because there are certain things he does that are very cringy and sometimes embarrassing or annoying, and he can also be very hyper. I guess it’s hard for me to pinpoint what exactly I feel when he acts cringy or hyper or embarrassing, I think I just start to feel judgy towards him and annoyed and maybe even embarrassed sometimes. It can just be a turn off. But I don’t want to be judgy towards him for those things, I don’t want to feel that way about him, it can just be tough sometimes. I’m also good friends with his sister and she is definitely extremely hyper and weird sometimes too but I don’t feel judgy towards her, she’s great, and she’s super friendly, she just has her moments where you start to question her sanity, but she’s really genuine and just a beautiful person. I guess it’s just different when you’re dating someone, because it can be a bit of a turn off. And I worry that it’s bad to feel that way, to feel turned off by that behaviour. And I want to do everything in my power to fix it. I feel terrible, because he is literally such an amazing person and I want to plan a future with him, but I’ve been fighting so hard for months, trying to work through all my feelings and being scared of what I think and feel. I’m so tired. What if it’s not ROCD, but I still want to make it work. It feels like the minute it’s not OCD, these become real reasons to leave, but I don’t want to leave. I want to make it work, and I’m worried it’s not OCD, but even if it wasn’t I’d want to fix it and make it work.
Sorry I’ve been posting a lot lately, im just really really distressed. I’m worrying a lot and my thoughts can’t seem to be quiet. I want to distract myself and stop thinking about all of this, but when im this stressed out, I can’t enjoy the things that I used to because all I can do is ruminate. Does anybody have advice on this? Advice on calming down your thoughts and ruminating
theres this guy i used to have a crush on when me and my bf broke up and no matter how much i try i cant lose the attraction or not think hes attractive and i keep thinking hes more attractive looks wise than my bf but i dont want to think that bcs i genuinely love my bf and i dont even want to feel anything towards this other guy can someone help or give advice please
So my ocd has found something new to obsess over, sadly. I’m the oldest sibling and I’ve always struggled with my anger. As a kid, I would take these feelings out on my siblings whenever they made me mad and i feel terrible now just thinking about it. My brother admitted to me a while ago that he felt so sad and depressed because of how rude I was. Thinking about it now, it makes me feel so ashamed. I was so mean to him. I’ve changed and he doesn’t feel that way anymore toward me anymore and our relationship is actually so much better. I guess im just obsessing over the fact that I caused my own brother to be depressed and sad. I wasn’t even worried about this before because I’ve changed. And I’m really scared because my ocd has been terrible lately, leading to a lot of stress. What if this stress leads to health issues like heart disease?? I’m really scared. Please help me
I recently revived my award for conquering my OCD. I was feeling great, having improved significantly. Previously my OCD was mostly focused on constant debilitating fears that something bad would happen to my loved ones. Now I can’t even remember the last time I had a thought like that which is great. I am preparing to move across the country to live with my boyfriend and now i’m experiencing ROCD which i’ve never had before. It’s been days of this now and am afraid I won’t be able to get it under control. It is also making me so sad because I have never had thoughts like these regarding my relationship before. Any suggestions on how to tackle this before it worsens? I am trying to use the same strategies I learned in therapy that I used for my other themes, however i’m struggling.
I wrote alot of posts with this topic but now i realized i might need to move out from my parents house. I dont want to and it makes me so sad. I dont want to leave my dog and live alone, with noone to help, i dont care about the things i have to do, cooking for myself and washing/cleaning, im okay with that, but mentally its really not a good idea. Im now crying cause im working on the sadness that i have to leave my dog and i wont see him. People cant understand others situation, its makes me angry that theres no other options on the internet, its just "move out" but these are the people who wanted to move out cause they cant go to party or stay outside late night, and they move and say it was a good idea, they are free and some people treat others like they are losers if they stay home with their parents, and how theyre a better person cause they live alone...I dont want to move, not because dad and mom buys and pays me everything and i can do what i want, since im working, im buying things for myself with my own money, i can cook for myself and i like to do it, and i would pay rent at home too. I dont want to move because of loneliness, that depressing feeling, going home after work and noones there to ask you how you doing, how was work, or if its even just a dog being happy that you came home. Moving out would be a mental suicide for me. I bought that dog a year ago cause i felt loneliness and boredom many times, but since i have him i didnt experienced those feelings, and now i just have to throw that away. Im really scared of feeling lonely. Others would say move with others, its not that easy, im struggling having friends, the ones i have already live with their girlfriend/boyfriend, you cant just find people. For some its easy, i went to uni and some of my collegues had to live in apartments cause they came from other cities, but they werent christians and you know uni life is about drinking, they just did that everyday. I couldnt live with people like that. Its not that easy to move away. If you want to and you have friends to not feel alone yeah its easy, but my only thing that makes me feel not lonely is my dog and i have to leave it to live alone its just puts me back to be misserable... if it would be a different reason that theres no other choice than okay i work on accepting it, but im angry cause i feel that theres other choices, its just everyone is so drunk with "move out". I know i will have to move out one day but its with my wife to start another family, if it would be that i would be happy, thats what im waiting for. But it doesnt seems like i would get a wife anytime soon... Im really sad that i have to leave my dog and it will be so hard to go through that...
i think I'm developing relationship OCD. i keep feeling like I don't want to look at my partner because I'm worried I won't be attracted to him. so many people online say that if you don't feel physically attracted you have to break up. i think that's going to happen. please don't reassure me even though my head's saying this might be real and not OCD. i want to always treat it like it's OCD
So, I was doing better last night because I was actually able to calm myself down, but now I’m worrying again. When I was little, I think I did some incest-related things. Nothing too extreme, but now I know better and I would never ever engage in those activities again. I don’t know how normal this is. I’m not attracted to ANY of my family members, but I feel so much shame and disgust when I think about what I did. How did I think that was okay? I feel so disgusting because I know how wrong incest is. Again, I did not do anything extreme but the fact that I did anything incest-related at all is scary. I don’t remember if I was aroused doing all of this, but if i was, then that would mean I was incestuous. This is so tiring and overwhelming, one minute I’ll feel better, the next minute, I’m worrying and ruminating. I feel so disgusting and I dont know how to stop these negative thoughts. I know how wrong incest is and would NEVER engage in those activities today. Please help me.
Why did I have to have ocd?? Why could I just be normal? This has been bothering me so much. I don’t know anybody that struggles with this, but the fact that this could get passed down to my children is terrifying. I don’t want to witness my kids struggle with the same things I did. On top of that, my ocd has been through the roof lately and it feels like I can’t do anything to help myself. I feel so disgusting and shameful.
A lot of people say to delay the compulsion. How do I delay it?? I ruminate a lot and I have no clue how to delay it. It’s like I have no control over my own thoughts and it bothers me every single day.
I used to deal with soocd (specifically the thought of never knowing my sexuality) when I was single years ago, but I was able to handle it and move past it for a while and be content with the conclusion of just liking people, not specific genders. Now that pride month is rolling around (happy pride everyone!!), I have seen an influx of videos on tiktok talking about comp het, specifically found in bi/pan women who are in relationships with men. I am currently in a relationship with my boyfriend for over a year now and I love him. We are going through so much (betryal trauma, handling my OCD for other themes, and just regular relationship issues) but we always choose to stick it through and keep fighting for us. Lately though with these videos constantly showing up, it has triggered my SOOCD to come back and at full force like never before. I feel like it's more intense now because I fear losing my relationship so my ocd has really grasped onto that fear. I talked with him last night and about the thoughts that are running around in my head regarding this. How it is so hard to really know who/what I'm actually attracted to without fearing that I'm wrong. How I'm worried I've wasted our time in this relationship if it really is comp het, or how I know that this is my OCD but how can I ever truly know? And it's not that I don't love him or find him attractive, but I can't help but freak out about "what if because I find women attractive I don't actually find him attractive?" or because I have an on and off relationship with sex and feeling the need to or having a very low sex drive sometimes that it means something deeper about my attraction towards him. I know it's a long read, bit soke advice or tips on how to navigate this or someone telling me they have dealt with the same thing ir hearing about people's experiences would really help. thank you and I wish for easy and kind thoughts for everyone <3
I don’t know what happened again. I feel so numb. I feel like I want to d!e. Not into doing something to myself and I’m making sure I’m not alone anyway, but I just can’t stand that feeling. Emotionally so exhausted and distressed. I just need someone to tell me it will eventually pass. Please. My life was so good before all of it. I can’t even be sad about it anymore. I don’t know if things can ever go back to normal. I feel like my brain changed. Idk how to explain it.
I’m constantly wondering if my boyfriend really likes me. Its taken a huge toll on my self esteem—both personality and appearance, and I feel horribly insecure and self conscious all the time. Anyone else gone through this or any tips?
I touched a random used towel by accident and I STILL don’t feel like my hand is clean after washing them with soap so many times. I used hot water and ran it under my hand till it burned HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA- I hate this f*cking mental illness… I should never ask for reassurance but…I really need this. Do you all think it’s clean enough, genuinely?
Does arousal = sexual orientation? Sometimes I get turned on by the female body (in porn) but I have no intention to do anything with them nor am I attracted to women that way in real life. My brain keeps telling me otherwise and I'm so confused rn. I've been attracted to men all my life
I work with kids so as to be expected my contamination ocd (surrounding getting sick, especially throwing up) gets triggered a lot. Which is hard, but usually worth it for me as I’m really passionate about my work. But sometimes it feels like I don’t know how I will be able to manage my contamination ocd while working with kids the rest of my life (teaching). It makes me really sad when I think about how my other coworkers don’t have these same worries of getting sick and can then focus more on their meaning fully work. Like today, a kid told me she threw up last night after her water bottle had previously sprayed water on my face and I couldn’t focus fully on the class for the rest of my shift 😭 which isn’t fair to the kids either but I did my best, considering I’m still reeling from that and struggling to refrain from rumination and other compulsions. Just trying to tell myself that I’ll survive regardless of if I get sick or not, even though my ocd brain equates throwing up to death haha. Anyways I’m not looking for reassurance, but more so just wanted to vent and see if anyone can relate at all.
If you are in crisis, please use these emergency resources to find immediate help.
OCD doesn't have to
rule your life
