- Date posted
- 1y
Should you let them share their ruminations and intrusive thoughts with you? How do you listen but not reassure them?
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Should you let them share their ruminations and intrusive thoughts with you? How do you listen but not reassure them?
I feel so horrible...My pocd keeps saying I "unknowingly erotically role played with a minor" when idek if this actually happened or not... this was nearly three years ago... (september of 2021) for context we were erotically role playing and then she suddenly stopped responding, before leaving the server shortly after an unknown time... im so freaking anxious and scared... her grammar was fine at first, but then as we were going on, she kept making errors like "boxer" or "then" instead of "than"... my pocd keeps saying that I "UNKNOWINGLY EROTICALLY ROLEPLAYED WITH A MINOR" when idek if this happened or not... someone told me she sounded like a young adult... chatGPT tells me she sounded like a teenager... I genuinely dont know what to believe anymore... (these two photos are from her account, and the beginning of our conversation... I hope she wasnt a teenager... I really hope she wasnt...)


I don't even really know if this was ever OCD. Or maybe my obsession is real. I feel like this was all deeeep denial. Anyone else?
What if you did something extremely horrible as a child that you didn’t know how horrible the events were that your POCD and real events OCD targets? Does it make the intrusive thoughts true? I'm getting anxious from my POCD and real event OCD based on real events (3 times) from when I was 13…… I don't ever want to ever be a P at all… I don't ever want to ever be a Chomo at all... i don’t ever want to ever be a rapist at all… I was 13 when these real events happened and now I'm 20... I've asked my mom about this so many times and every time she tells me that it's not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I'm not a rapist or a P or a chomo... I didn’t realize how horrible the real events actually were… I was 13 at the time… now I’m 20… my POCD and real event OCD call me a P or a chomo because of the real events… while my mom reassures me all the time that it’s all over, that it’s not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I’m not a P or a rapist or a chomo, but when I was doing compulsive research, I remember when I saw a post on a non OCD forum about someone’s similar situation to mine and two people said to the person that they m*lested and that they needed to turn themselves in… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form… i didn’t know how horrible the real events were when I was 13… I really didn’t… and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… I don't ever want to ever harm a child in any way shape or form... I seriously don't ever want to do that to any child in any way shape or form and I seriously don't ever want to do anything like that to any kid now or in the future… I never have had any fantasies about kids and I don't ever want to... I don't ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form... I was 13….. and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… And it’s comparing me to actual P’s and chomo’s who did stuff from 12-15 and then did stuff as adults, and making me think I’m a P and a Chomo because of it… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way… 😭😭😭
I hope this post can find someone who is currently going through false memory ocd. I just want to say, I have been dealing with false memory OCD for the past two months. I’ve gotten into depression because of it. But today, I had an awakening that truly made me wake up from this nightmare. Call me weird, but I sat in my living room couch and pictured myself as how I was without OCD or its thinking patterns. I also pictured myself as how I am now with OCD tendencies. I started to conversate about what I am currently going through and I was just able to step out of that ocd bubble and stepped out as a normal person with normal thinking behaviors and let me tell you I laughed. I was so in that head space of not having the agony of fear and anxiety weighing over my head at that moment, instead I felt ‘free’ like when I did when I didn’t have OCD. My point here is, today I realized how much OCD can ruin your life and distort memories in this case. In terms of false memory or OCD adding stuff to a memory, it’s so funny how we fall into that trap. This may sound harsh, but realistically you just know when you do something bad or if you didn’t. Yes, bad memory can come into play and other natural/normal things. But a person with OCD with good memory, come on, don’t we see that our ENEMY is doubt. Your brain is just naturalized to grasp onto things that point out. For example, my real event OCD memory is about that I had an intrusive thought to be friendly to a guy behind my boyfriend’s back. All I can think ‘with ocd tendencies’ did i just act on that, did I smile more when I had that thought because I was smiling during this. See what I mean, a person with no OCD would come to me and say you just know. I didn’t go out of my way and start having a conversation with this guy, simply although my ocd finds it hard to grasp on to this but I was just smiling to whatever the guy was saying and this thought came in the midst that’s all. I realized that the ‘ what if’s’ are simple fears. There are no ‘what if’s’ from past events im sorry. It’s a simple yes or no because you just feel it within yourself. I also realized people with OCD over stretch things. For example, the day of my false memory I told my boyfriend that the thought was about flirting when I know it felt as being friendly because I wanted to give him worst case scenario. Not only that but I came across this YouTube video that distorted it more for me. This doctor on YouTube said ‘ you tend to remember a memory best, when you remember it the first time. I had an immense amount of anxiety now asking myself if the thought felt flirtation. But I will not let a video or no man come and torment it more for me. We have to be careful with things we hear and watch. To continue, We have to come to realization that if you are doubting yourself and omg did I do this or did it play out like that, come on step out of that bubble and see the root of this. So much unhealed trauma that we drag with us every day. The problem is never the problem but the way we interpret situations and how much of a big deal we make it when it’s so small. You know yourself and you know when you do bad things or not. It makes you unstable to sit here and doubt your every action. Accept for the things that you do and move on and stop dwelling on the what ifs. God has not called us to be double-minded but single-minded. The Bible says ‘ a double minded man is unstable in all his ways’ James 1:8. You got this, sit yourself as a person with a normal thinking pattern or who you used to be without OCD and picture yourself with your ocd tendencies in front of you and talk it out. God is with you, we can do this. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear but of power, love, and a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7
What if you did something extremely horrible as a child that you didn’t know how horrible the events were that your POCD and real events OCD targets? Does it make the intrusive thoughts true? I'm getting anxious from my POCD and real event OCD based on real events (3 times) from when I was 13…… I don't ever want to ever be a P at all… I don't ever want to ever be a Chomo at all... i don’t ever want to ever be a rapist at all… I was 13 when these real events happened and now I'm 20... I've asked my mom about this so many times and every time she tells me that it's not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I'm not a rapist or a P or a chomo... I didn’t realize how horrible the real events actually were… I was 13 at the time… now I’m 20… my POCD and real event OCD call me a P or a chomo because of the real events… while my mom reassures me all the time that it’s all over, that it’s not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I’m not a P or a rapist or a chomo, but when I was doing compulsive research, I remember when I saw a post on a non OCD forum about someone’s similar situation to mine and two people said to the person that they m*lested and that they needed to turn themselves in… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form… i didn’t know how horrible the real events were when I was 13… I really didn’t… and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… I don't ever want to ever harm a child in any way shape or form... I seriously don't ever want to do that to any child in any way shape or form and I seriously don't ever want to do anything like that to any kid now or in the future… I never have had any fantasies about kids and I don't ever want to... I don't ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form... I was 13….. and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… And it’s comparing me to actual P’s and chomo’s who did stuff from 12-15… and making me think I’m a P and a Chomo because of it… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way… 😭😭😭
I’m a rookie when it comes to ocd (I have had it almost all my life but got diagnosed 3 years ago). I want to know which books were most helpful for your recovery (my main struggles are with false memory, guilt, shame, and real event). Also, I have been reading Albert Ellis’s book “How to stubbornly refuse to make yourself miserable”, would love your opinion on whether it was helpful if youve read it.
So I have been obsessing over a real event that happened 25 years ago. It flares up from time to time but this time it has stuck for every single day for 8 months all day long. Anyways it’s gotten to the point that everywhere I look or anything I see will be about something that matches the theme of my obsession. Then I start to wonder is God telling me something or showing me signs of confirmation that my fears are true. Not sure if anyone else has experienced seeing signs every where that point to your obsession
Anyone else with false memory / real event ever turn into a detective and start to guess details while looking back on old pictures to see if you’re correct about anything? If you have been correct about anything how did you cope? I’ve been correct about a radiator on a wall & I dunno if I’m being delusional here but it’s making me feel like my false memory is real even though I’m sure it’s not? I dunno if I’m just completely alone in this but I feel like it.
Have to go to court tomorrow and face my harasser. I am terrified and it’s making my OCD go out of whack and is scaring me.
It’s near the tenth anniversary of when I saw my dad die, I can’t get the intrusive thoughts out of my head of him dying. Before today I was awake for 48 hours straight. God I just feel so exhausted.
Long story short, I have been dealing with OCD for the past two years due to trauma I developed from texting a guy I was not supposed to during my relationship with my partner of 2 years. Ever since, I have developed obsessions and fear towards men in general. 2 months ago today, I experienced something that has been one of the worst obsessions I have encountered. I went to the gym to cancel my membership. At the counter, I encountered a guy whom seemed very friendly and outgoing. By the start, I felt weirded out because I’m like okay this guy is friendly. I was being nice and chill without being so hard on myself. In the midst of me smiling to something the guy was saying, I get a thought of ‘ be friendly behind your boyfriends back’. I was terrified and that whole situation just felt wrong. Willingly, I told my partner and he tells me to move on and it’s okay. As an OCD person, I have tendencies of telling my boyfriend worst case scenario or being extra about stuff ( making things worse than what they are). Long story short, I have gotten over that situation. Now what I haven’t gotten over was from what I said. The day that this happened, I was telling my partner about this situation and looking back at our messages, I seen that I said the thought was about ‘ to flirt behind my boyfriends back’. Obviously that is unacceptable, especially if I said what if I smiled alittle more because of that. I remember a couple of weeks ago, I would scroll right pass this message and think to myself confidently ( I was overstretching that thought, it was about being friendly). Not until 2 weeks ago, I seen this doctor on a YouTube video who said you tend to remember a memory almost perfectly the very first time you recall it. So I’m like, I said that about the thought being flirtatious the day of and so am I going crazy. So yeah, ever since I seen that stupid video I have been overly examining trying to remember how the thought felt. Although I said that, I have some memory of overstretching and I also know that I recall the thought about being friendly not to flirt. Any help with learning how to trust yourself with memories? Do you guys think that it’s just silly ocd always putting doubt on everything? Please help!!!
Now I feel like one is imminent, I’m starting to really struggle and my anxiety is through the roof. I started Wegovy 4 weeks ago and also switched from combination birth control pill to the mini pill about the same time, I’m wondering if these changes are impacting my mental stability and triggering my OCD. I’m so scared, replaying real event (or false memory) things over and over again in my head again.
This post may be triggering but I need to talk to someone 😔 So, when I was little, I used to be obsessed with this game habbo hotel. For those who don't know what habbo hotel is, it used to be a game where you play as an avatar and you interact with ppl online around the world. I used to go on that website all the time as a kid. I'm scared to even type this but I think I was groomed. I don't remember how old I was (I think was about 12-13). I didn't know what s*x was at the time so I remember the person I was talking to was saying inappropriate things and I was saying ianppropriate things. Thinking about idk if that person was the same age as me or older. But thinking about it makes me very uncomfortable what if that person was an adult. Ya'll I'm crying and I don't know what to do.
Hello, I'm new here. I went through a really intense and traumatic breakup about a year ago and I'm currently working with my university for a SA/Title IX case against him as he was abusive in varying ways and very manipulative. I have the need to check and search the parking lots, the spaces around me, etc.. for him and his very distinct car frequently. It's been getting a lot better as I'm seeking therapy and back on medications. But some days I still have frequent urges to check, I feel like if I don't check, then something bad is going to happen. Aka, I'll run into him, and I fear he'll hurt me or say something to purposefully distress me. I get incredibly nauseous, panicked, obsessive overthinking if I don't which doesn't allow me to be present and learn in classes. Something that has helped me cope is having headphones and sticking to a strict routine and limiting my time on campus.
I just remembered that at school we have swimming class every couple of months. But now I suddenly started questioning „what if during swimming clash I had touched another classmate inappropriately?“ and now I keep trying to remember when I had swimming class. I know that up until 2021 I was always around my sister and like the years before that too and there I was quite damn young so I wouldn’t say anything like this would just cross my mind. I also remember that, due to covid, we didn’t have swimming class until idk, maybe 2022. I also just now remembered I had sth on my foot that I was really embarrassed abt and I didn’t want to get bullied so I skipped as often as I could back then and even had sth from my doctor so I could skip. Basically I was at swimming class maybe 2-4 times that entire year. Then, the same in 2023. I also was around one of my friends at the time then so there wasn’t a lot that could’ve possibly happened either. But now that I remembered the time in 2022 that I skipped so often that I had to show up on some Friday for a few minutes after school to get a grade and now I’m worried sth might’ve happened there. And like, back then there were some children in that pool too bc the teacher had some children’s swimming training for like 5th graders or sth. And now I keep thinking „what if I had touched one of them inappropriately?“ and like the thing is that from my memories I remember that I didn’t even get close to them bc I was in the 3 meters deep part of the pool and they in the 1,50 meters deep one. So basically there was no way for me to get close to them at all. I also only was in that part of the pool for like 1-1,5 minutes, I then switched to another part in which there was some kind of border thing to the other part of the pool. I also of course was only swimming normally and I remember I still had the thing on my foot so all I thought abt was trying to have nobody see it and there were two swimming teachers, they probably would’ve seen if I had actually done anything, right? I know this all just doesn’t make sense but I keep thinking „but what if?“ even tho I have no memory to doing that at all.
I always feel like my fears are coming true. I’m so scared of reality
my thoughts are based on real events that i remember so when i have what ifs it's that what keeps me reeled in, i'm trying to push through the intense feelings it's just so hard
What if you did something extremely horrible as a child that you didn’t know how horrible the events were that your POCD and real events OCD targets? Does it make the intrusive thoughts true? I'm getting anxious from my POCD and real event OCD based on real events (3 times) from when I was 13…… I don't ever want to ever be a P at all… I don't ever want to ever be a Chomo at all... i don’t ever want to ever be a rapist at all… I was 13 when these real events happened and now I'm 20... I've asked my mom about this so many times and every time she tells me that it's not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I'm not a rapist or a P or a chomo... I didn’t realize how horrible the real events actually were… I was 13 at the time… now I’m 20… my POCD and real event OCD call me a P or a chomo because of the real events… while my mom reassures me all the time that it’s all over, that it’s not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I’m not a P or a rapist or a chomo, but when I was doing compulsive research, I remember when I saw a post on a non OCD forum about someone’s similar situation to mine and two people said to the person that they m*lested and that they needed to turn themselves in… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form… i didn’t know how horrible the real events were when I was 13… I really didn’t… and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… I don't ever want to ever harm a child in any way shape or form... I seriously don't ever want to do that to any child in any way shape or form and I seriously don't ever want to do anything like that to any kid now or in the future… I never have had any fantasies about kids and I don't ever want to... I don't ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form... I was 13….. and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… And it’s comparing me to actual P’s and chomo’s who did stuff from 12-15… and making me think I’m a P and a Chomo because of it… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way… 😭😭😭
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