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i saw videos on tiktok that people who would pray would end up being gay and i have been praying everyday that i don’t end up gay. I don’t want to be gay but i’m scared that i’m gonna end up changing my mind. What do i do?

I was sleeping and i had a dream about a girl who is young and she was being touchy with me and it seemed like I liked it. And then i woke up and i felt so miserable and scared, like why would this be in my head and why would i appear to like it😔

I feel like I don’t wanna be w my bf anymore😭 I know I love him and I know I’ve loved him so much in the past, but now it feels like I’d rather have a girl in his place. I felt so much like I wanted to tell him or break up when I was with him (which felt like ocd) but the thoughts I was having about women instead of him felt calm like I wanted it as if they were intuition :(

I get so confused with all this. OCD is the doubting disorder right. So a thought comes in. “Are you gay?” You’ve been seemingly straight your whole life and seemingly enjoyed it. It never came up before nor did it have to. You’re meant to be able to shrug it off as a random thought but your mind then goes… “are you sure?” Because it asked the question again, you start to feel a little uneasy. Anxious. Why would I be asking myself that? Then it goes “are you attracted to women?” Because you’re anxious, you aren’t really attracted to anything at the moment so your brain goes “see…are you sure you’re not gay?” Obviously more anxiety comes flooding in and doubt has consumed you to the point you don’t now what is up vs down. Is this normal for those with ocd? And - the fact that the brain throws at you thoughts/statements like “you know deep down you want it/like it”. Do these happen purely because of the anxiety your mind is under? In that, we just automatically assume the worse or our fear is or must be true?

it’s so funny how i can go from thinking i’m a lesbian in denial, to me being a murderer and wanting to kill my family, to me secretly wanting to be a boy, to me being a cannibal, then to me thinking i’m going to be possessed in a matter of minutes. whenever i’m not focused on a certain theme, i see how illogical it was and how there’s no truth to it whatsoever. but when i’m actually going through it, it seems like it’s the truth and i spiral. just love life 😍😍

I feel like I can't talk about it with anyone to not lead them into thinking I'm gay in denial or that I'm homophobic whereas none of that is true. I often see OCD therapists talking about HOCD symptoms online and they want to make sure they'll use proper wording to not give off the impression that it's rooted in homophobia or denial somehow to avoid backlash from people, but I think some of them end up not telling it like it is. They say people with HOCD do know what their sexual orientation is and are not actually attracted to the same sex, but why do they feel like they do? If they knew 100% that they're not attracted, then this wouldn't be an issue. It's the same thing with POCD. The thoughts, feelings and sensations feel incredibly real to the person, yet they're not attracted to children. How do they know?

I’ve gotten alot better but the past week has been hard. I ended things with this guy who I thought I really liked but he was seeing other people and I couldn’t take it. The cherry on top I had a panic attack and thought I was pregnant. I’m not. Now I’m back to thinking I’m a lesbian. I was talking to my aunt and mom about my future wedding and children and got excited. I feel like I’ll never feel attracted to another man again or never enjoy sex. And then seeking reassurance I went on the nocd page and read a story about a woman who had so ocd that turned out to be queer. And now I feel like this is going to happen to me. I also redownloaded tik tok and I keep getting videos about late bloomer lesbians. It feels like the world is telling me I am. Despite the feelings I just had for this guy I feel like I must be a lesbian and I’m just deeply in denial. It’s coming back and I feel like my attraction to men has always been forced.

Am I lesbian or it’s just hocd and libido issues? I (F29) don’t feel desire to have sex with my boyfriend (M32) and I am scared it’s because I am lesbian. We are together 3 years and we are also living together. I think I am more aroused by lesbian porn and lesbian fantasies than straight stuff and sex with men. I always dated men and I felt drawn to them, I also never wanted to be with a woman in real life and I was never attracted to a woman in real life, but I am scared I am just in denial and didn’t know about it or I always knew but didn’t want to accept the truth :-(. It’s not that I never wanted to have sex with men, but when the relationship starts to be serious the desire decreases. I really don’t know what to do. I love my boyfriend and don’t want to break up with him. It’s not a new topic for me. I deal with it already 4 years. I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder 5 years ago, because I had panic attacks and some health ocd. After one year I started to be scared that I am a lesbian. I had a therapy and I talked about it with my therapists and they said it’s ocd, but I didn’t tell them the whole true about the porn and fantasies. In my country (Poland/Germany) the therapists are mainly familiar with health or harm ocd, so I don’t know if my therapists were familiar with these kind of thoughts. Also sometimes I think that even if it’s ocd it doesn’t mean it’s not truth. The only difference is that I am just more worried, scared and obsessed about it than other people who are questioning their sexuality. Also I even don’t know if it’s still ocd. It feels more like denial right now. Like I know the truth, but I just don’t want to accept it or I try to convince myself that for example it’s normal in long term relationship to not desire sex but the truth is it’s not normal if it happens all the time. I don’t really have ocd symptoms right now. At the beginning I was very scared and had to google all the time etc., but right now I just have pretty normal life. I am just still worried about it and ruminate though right now I try to avoid the whole thoughts and feelings all the time. And this is exactly what the people call denial. Knowing the truth but avoiding it… I don’t know if i have still doubts. It’s more like I know deep down what is the truth but I still hope it’s not the truth and try to convince myself that it’s everything ok but it doesn’t work because I am just a lesbian :-( TL;DR - I have sex issues in my relationship. I don’t feel desire to have sex and I am looking for a solution how to change it. Hopefully it’s because ocd and I am not attracted to women.

i think my mind is accepting the thoughts in my head. I don’t wanna be gay i wanna feel like my old self again. I keep getting groinal responses to men and i cant find women attractive anymore. But all my life i have loved women and all i have ever wanted was a girlfriend. i need help

Hey, well, this is my first time ever posting in here but I figured why not? I’ve been struggling with this issue for almost three months now and it’s been a constant battle, I guess I just really need some support, so almost a year ago now, I got in a relationship and I realized I may be Asexual since I didn’t really have any sexual desires towards my partner, starting late November though, I began to have these intrusive images in my head of us having sex. These thoughts have caused me a lot of anxiety and stress as well as depression. It’s weird, I know deep down in my heart I don’t desire any of that with her but the thoughts feel so real at times and sometimes that makes me feel like I want the thoughts. I’m pretty much lost at this point and don’t know if whether it is OCD or if I’m just in denial. The thing is, I don’t want to see her that way, she doesn’t want to ever engage in any sexual activity and I want to respect that and respect the decision we both made to never do so unless it’s to have a baby. I just feel a sense of doom I guess, I’m scared that I might like the thoughts when I don’t want to like them. I’d feel so much guilt if it isn’t OCD and it’s actually me, and the thought of that terrifies me. I hope every day it’s OCD.

Hi everyone, My therapist is not a fan of ERP, we are doing a compassionate based therapy and she really wants to get to the bottom of what is behind my OCD and core fears. However, we have been trying CFT for over a year and I am still struggling with CFT and day to day life. I am really keen to try ERP and she has said yes if I come up with suggestions. Would be very grateful for some ideas of good first ERP exercises for someone with SOCD and ROCD. Thanks in advance!

In the past few months, I've been worried about the body proportions of women I imagine. I'm confused, and I don't know what ERP for my niche case looks like. It might sound silly, but I appreciate your advice. I've had HOCD symptoms since 2020 though I didn't know much about what OCD was or that my condition was OCD until 2023. My main compulsion has been to "correct" intrusive homosexual images by replacing them with a heterosexual one. However, as I learned about OCD and realized themes such as ZOCD and POCD exist, these themes eventually began my main OCD content. Lately I've been worrying about the incorrect, too small body proportions of the images of adult women, sexual orsexualthat instantly come to my mind. That's especially distressing when I build these images during wanted sexual fantasies or, admittedly, when doing other OCD compulsions. Sometimes it feels like a bully in my brain is making these images small or makes it tiring for my brain to maintain a more realistic (at least as I precieve it) body proportion, although my aim is to imagine adult women. Sorry for the long text. My question is, how does ERP look like in my case? Am I to let these images go on, including in the middle of my fantasies? How about when these images are themselves OCD compulsions? What if I let them go on and they become smaller and smaller, and I begin enjoying and preferring those smaller proportions? I've been avoiding (and also not much interested in) my sexual imaginations mainly due to this. Is not engaging in these imaginations avoidance? Again, thanks for reading this and advice.

Would quitting my porn addiction help with hocd? I believe it's becoming a reassurance compulsion, as I go on to prove to myself I am straight by watching straight porn. But then I find myself noticing the dude and checking to see if I find him attractive. Which continues the cycle of continuing to try to prove I am not attracted. I've been struggling with hocd for about a year and a half, it's been Hell every second of it. I never had questioned my sexuality before this, not once and I had been obsessed with girls every since I started to notice them. I so badly want to find a nice lady and have a big family and the thought of being gay scares me so much. I just can't beat this thing. Maybe quitting porn is the answer? I am so drained from this fucking thing, I miss me before hocd, I'd give anything to go back to before this.

i started having hocd at age 12 but didn’t know what it was till this past year at age 15. i was convinced i was gay but also like knew i wasent. i thought grounal responses was being turned on so i pretty much convinced myself that’s what it was. now i’m scared i really am gay and am just in denial. please help me i only want boys and i don’t wanna be gay i just wanna be happy and normal. i have false attraction and false feelings and groinals and thoughts and i want my attraction to men back

Still doubting bruh I don’t know what to do someday I feel like I am straight and some say not and also don’t remember or feel like what it like being straight and feel like I have no interest in woman but back then I always wanted a woman now I don’t really does anyone know what I mean?

Lately I’ve been feeling pretty confused on almost everything now to the point where I just don’t even know anymore. Every positive thought turns into a bad one such as finding out people in denial tend to avoid thinking about it completely, made me feel pretty good but now it’s telling me that’s how I think. I’ve been having false attraction, feeling sick to stomach, can’t stop thinking, feeling like I’m lying to myself, feeling numb, the only emotion I can feel is being scared the more real this feels. I’m extremely worried that this is becoming true and that I am gay. The only thing I have left is what I want, which is to marry the girl I am with one day, that brings me a good feeling. Anyways, what are some methods of being able to tell what’s real and what’s not when everything is leaning towards being gay besides what I want?

I just wanted to tell you that I feel much calmer when I feel something identified with most of you, knowing that I wasn't going crazy or something similar gives me that hope I wanted to feel :3 I keep working on my soocd because I don't like at all the idea of becoming someone I don't want to be, you know? Never before did I come to doubt my sexual orientation, I even came to think that it would be cool to be bisexual so I could enjoy my sexuality more, but it was just like a comment because it wasn't really something I wanted. I usually feel bad when I see a woman and I don't feel attracted to her as I used to, it's like it makes me feel less like a man or something like that, and this strengthens my ocd with my sexual orientation, I've changed too much because of my ocd in general, it's hard to ignore something you feel real, more because by pretending that nothing happens, it feels like you realize the fact that you are what you overthink, shall I explain?? I hope so because I'm writing this with the help of a translator hehe I worry that I don't like women anymore, I worry about losing myself or something, I worry about that feeling of being attracted (?? For a man, I sometimes avoid using social media because it bothers me that my mind makes me believe those things. I know I'm not gay because I've proved it to myself, but as much as I remember me that it's like my mind doesn't have enough proof for it :( I've even come to think that I'm making up all this ocd stuff to keep "pretending" that I'm not gay, even that sounds illogical, but that's the problem, that even knowing it's illogical, sometimes it feels like it's logical. Thank you for taking the trouble to read it, I needed to vent even a little of one of my most recurrent thoughts If you have something to comment on, do so!

I feel my heart break when I think of losing my bf, I still feel a small part of me want him but now everything is pointing me just being lesbian. I’m convinced now that I only like being w him because of the male attention😭thinking of being lesbian and being w women doesn’t feel like desire at all like how lesbians describe it, but it feels so real and part of me just wants to give up and break up with him and just give in to this :( I get a lot of anxiety now thinking about being w men and feels like there’s no other way to explain this. I know it’s seeking for reassurance but it feels so hard to bring myself back from this to even say “maybe maybe not”. I just need some advice :(

I need help I dont know if its hocd or i am actually of the opposite sexual orientation Its been 2 weeks now 2 weeks of non stop overthinking Of not feeling like myself Of remembering stuff that happened before Now i fear that it actually might be true because i’m not getting annoyed at the thoughts anymore and this is distressing me further I cant afford therapy and i even dont want to go fearing that it will reveal to me that i actually am of the opposite orientation Its torture Every time i’m with women now i feel anxious and uncomfortable This never happened before I dont know if i have experienced ocd before but i am really familiar with health anxiety as i am a hypochondriac I also had relationship anxiety which now that i think abt it it might be that i’m a comphet and wasnt actually attracted to my partner I need this to stop Plz help me What if i actually dont have ocd and i have been just using it as an excuse that i’m straight I literally am remembering every single time i have found a woman attractive and its making me anxious I dont want to be with women but maybe its just bc thats what we were taught

I don’t think I can get into the army .. I’m reading over my hospital documents from when I was admitted and it’s no good. And then they wrote down that I was attracted to gay porn and was scared im bisexual when I don’t think I am attracted to gay porn bc I never looked at it before this stuff happened so I feel embarrassed and upset. I feel just doubtful for my future. I don’t know what to do.