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Struggling currently. Anyone here have it and what did you find helpful to overcome?

I have been struggling with insomnia for the past 2 years. It started after several months of intense focus on a reflux condition that was not there. I may have had some reflux at the start but it must have went away bc I had an endoscopy performed and they found no signs of reflux. It was all nerves. I focused on all my symptoms. I watched every bit of food I ate. I could sleep during it but I still had the reflux feeling. It was all mental. I had a stressful job that I should have left. After several months of struggling with this I finally gave in and went on Temp Disability for 3 months. Just after I left my job the reflux went away and I was relieved BUT then came the insomnia. I was so hyper vigilant of my body that it seeped into my subconscious and bam I couldn’t sleep. I think the lack of sleep was worse than the reflux. Now here I am on sleep meds and more anxiety meds to keep calm and sleep through the night. I would like nothing more than to sleep at night naturally. It’s difficult for me to work esp if shift work. I’m hoping I can find the right help/therapy for me to get back to living.

One of my most persistent symptoms of OCD is being convinced that I have some kind of severe or terminal illness. I've had so many appointments (that have picked up a few things but nothing that's been a death sentence). Every ache, symptom, I'm absolutely convinced something is wrong. Then I'll get it checked out, and it's normal. Or I'll feel a sensation like earlier I felt a sharp pain in my stomach when I pressed the upper part of it, CONVINCED its stomach cancer. And then I burped and I'm perfectly fine. I get so intensely wrapped in worry, and then later on I see I completely made everything up. It's so exhausting.

Here I am once again. I found a small moveable lump under my chin so I ended up going to the ER because i couldn’t wait to get in to a ENT. The Dr just felt it and said it’s a gland. I told her it doesn’t feel like the one on the other side. She did a CBC and said she isn’t worried about it. I can’t get it out of my head that she’s wrong. I have been looking at a Prayer request that went out from a well known radio host and read all the comments of people asking for Prayers due to them or loved ones having cancer. All I want to do is sleep, as soon as I wake up I get the surge of anxiety and panic. I fear death and worry IF there is no afterlife and this makes things 💯 worse. I’m tired

Please can someone tell me if this is part of ocd: I get physical discomforts and itchy sensations everytime I try to relax or to sleep. I feel the need to scratch or adjust my clothes or rub my hands and this goes on for hours. I feel exhausted and when I do ERP the sensations get worse or keep coming back.. help

I’ve only recently discovered that I have developed Health Concern OCD, Existential OCD and Somatic OCD. There’s a lot going on in my head all the time. In the past year, specifically the last few months, I’ve had the same recurring thoughts: -How were humans created to breathe? It’s crazy how our bodies can breathe on its own while we sleep. It’s not something anyone should ever think about yet I always think about the way I breathe, if I’m breathing enough, what if I randomly stop breathing or forget how to breathe? -I feel there is always something wrong with me. I have random sharp shooting pains in my chest, I experience heart palpitations frequently, I feel off balance almost every day. What if there’s something seriously wrong with me DESPITE all of the doctor’s visits, blood tests, EKGs and heart ultrasounds I’ve done in 2023 that all confirm I’m “healthy” and there is nothing wrong. What if I wake up and something is seriously wrong with me throughout the day and I come to find out I have a terminal illness? -Why do our bodies turn on us and make us sick? Why does illness strike unexpectedly? Why was I put on this earth? Where do we go and what happens when we die? What happens to our souls? Our soul is what makes us and our soul is a small little voice in our head and that voice is trusting the house (our bodies) it lives in to keep it safe and out of danger and to provide a long and healthy life/home for our soul. It’s exhausting having all of these thoughts on repeat every day. How do I make these thoughts stop!?

I dont know if thid is actually my ocd because my stresser was my dad being in hospital and I’ve been in therapy had EMDR sessions and I’ve been completely fine since then but now.. Anyone have flare ups after a change in your life? I’m a student nurse and I’ve just finished my first placement and I’ve never been so happy like I was on that placement and now I’m back at uni… I have constant breathlessness, what ifs and a strong need to cry and a massive feeling of panic and in my head I’m like no no no this can’t be happening. if you get me and I don’t know why it’s happening again but I want it to stop I was doing so fucking well I was happy. Like actually happy and now….

My new obsession is any little pain I feel around my heart or arm is a heart issue even if I know deep inside is no my thoughts will try to convince me that it is and that I should be hyper super alert of any sensation for “safety” well today I stopped the hyper focus on it and just letting the pain be there I felt so risky like I was risking my life but pain when away and I felt so much better after taking the “risk”

Here's my story, I'm just your typical 33 year old, going through life, started feeling depressive/anxiety symptoms starting about 29.5. Benefitted from CBT immensely. I am also avid podcast listener and did a lot of diligent work on this path to self discovery, overcoming my people pleasing, learning to set boundaries, saying guilt free nos', standing up for myself without it wrecking me after, so on. My symptoms on most days are non existent, just the usual stuff, the seasonal depressions, and so on. The only thing I haven't fully mastered/managed/learned to manage has been my somatic symptoms. I get hyper aware of some sensation, or symptom, try to ignore it, goes away on its own, the mental triggers, I got that down, ignore/observe/let it fade away. Few years ago, I developed somatic breathing, where I suddenly become aware of my breathing, or feeling like there isn't enough of it, this started post pandemic. Think it had to do with a lot of anxiety, not having seen my family in years, so on. There was also some swallowing related somatic feelings too, I used to check my O2 sat. That was probably the trigger. It went away over the course of the years and became manageable and even one I totally overcame. Recently, I've been feeling kinda stuck, wanting some change, feeling like there is a permenence to the impermanence, coupled with a rather depressing and low sunlight winter, I am going through a bout of seasonal depression. My darling body and mind are taking care of me, being over protective, etc etc. Few weeks ago, I had a near fainting episode, with the trigger being fear itself. Coupled with dehydration, some exertion by taking too many stairs, I even remembered thinking, oh this is happening, it was brief, and I went to the ER, they were amazing, took so much care of me, did all kinds of tests, and determined that I was all good, just an unfortunate incident. Now my depression is making me not feel motivated to workout or anything, but I am high functioning and I get through it without much of a change in how I show up in the world. I was able to invariably conclude that the trigger was fear itself. And I recently heard a podcast where the doctor/speaker mentioned that for somatic symptoms, the distraction on onset of symptoms itself is the trigger. Much like when we shine a light on a strange thought. Although it's only been a week and a half. I'm already mostly back to normal, and grateful for all the support and kindness I've found during this time from family, friends, and the amazing doctors. Here is my little insight: there is a catch 22 about somatoform, the fear of the fear or fear of reoccurrence, or reading about the symptoms, even to educate yourself, are triggering. Much alike pure o. My only suggestion, compassion to yourself, and do your exposures when you are ready, don't rush. Love and wellbeing to you all.

I didn't even realize. I'm about to get my period and my anxiety is higher. I'm noticing how my friend hasn't written back to my texts or hasn't answered the last 3 times I called. I think he doesn't want to be my friend anymore. I wrote a text and asked if I did something wrong and he didn't respond. My other friend annoyed me. And I think my other friend doesn't like me that much. I feel abandoned and forgotten and like I must be a bad friend or bad person or why would they all forget me like this. What did I do? Did I take my opinions too far? I've been picking at my skin, having a feeling of unrest. I just watch Netflix and lie on my couch to avoid it. I look okay, but I haven't worked in a year purposefully to find a new way, but I haven't found it yet. I'm doing so much, but it always feels like too little. I tell myself again and again that I'm doing enough, but there's always a voice that says no you're lazy, you're unhealthy and you're just making excuses. I hyperfixate on stupid solutions like blood tests, supplements, genetic testing to explain my symptoms my depression (or is it laziness) my anxiety, my lack of energy, my aches and pains. I quit all drugs and alcohol even caffeine. I track my sleep. I want to feel good. And believe it or not I was thinking I did feel good? Until the afternoon. I don't know. I really hope this is just some fucking b vitamin deficiency and I'll take some pills and be reborn as a human and not a trash pile. Look at me all perfect. With all my career, and my money, and friends who don't like me. Don't I look put together. I'm so imperfect and so scared of anyone finding out. I'm so scared to tell anyone how messed up I am on the inside. I rant to my therapist, my coaches, whoever but I'm just going around in circles. Without support I'd be fucking nuts. Thankfully I pay people to support me. Because no one would for free. Fuck my.life.

I felt so understood when I learned that a characteristic of OCD is to question or doubt your own judgment. This is something I experienced quite frequently, and especially around my physical disability which causes pain. I wanted to ask if anybody else living with OCD and a disability or chronic illness sometimes questions their pain and has thought patterns along the lines of "this hurts... but does it really hurt?" Or " I don't feel good.... but do I just not feel good because I'm thinking about how I don't feel good?" Let me know in the comments if this is something you experience. Sending love and support to anyone living with OCD or other comorbid conditions. P.S- I have found OCD recovery YouTube Channel very validating

I don’t know what to do anymore. Anytime I feel the highs OCD ruins it and I feel like I can’t be happy. Im 20 and I can’t imagine living the rest of my life like this. I have no idea what to do, im so hyper aware of my actions (blinking, etc) a complete hypochondriac and I cannot enjoy life anymore. There is no quality of life with horrible OCD.

Does anyone else obsess about having another panic attack or scan their body constantly for how they feel and if a thought or feeling about a panic attacks comes on, you’re more likely to start to feel panicky?

Hi everyone this is going to be a long introduction. When I was much younger I struggled with debilitating anxiety I worked on myself and took medication and got so much better. Since then I have been living a normal life up until about 6 months ago. I became pregnant with my second child. At 16 weeks pregnant I lost the baby I ended up hemorrhaging being rushed to the hospital having emergency surgery and the entire experience was absolutely horrifying. I thought I was doing so much better until recently when I started experiencing neck issues. I know this sounds extremely weird but I feel like I constantly have to crack or stretch my neck it drove me crazy to the point where I went to a chiropractor and had X-rays done and adjustments. Which made me feel better for a little bit and then it came back. I find myself thinking about how my neck feels and having to be cracked constantly and then I’m on the internet researching how cracking my neck can affect me and a million other things. I have also been experiencing anxiety over it to the point where I took some prescribed Valium to help me get through the day. I am a hypochondriac I have always since I was a little kid been absolutely consumed about dying or having something horrible wrong with my health. I dwell on how scary the thought of having a heart attack or stroke or anything is to the point where I have gone to the hospital for random weird feelings and things I have experienced that were nothing but self inflicted anxiety. I did not think I ever had OCD until very recently since I started researching it. I have noticed a pattern now throughout my life of worrying about everyone I love dying and worrying about me dying and how it will happen and what will happen. I used to tighten my chest repeatedly until it would hurt and I couldn’t get myself to stop until I finally got a hold of myself and stopped. Then I went to every doctor imaginable to make sure I was ok and had a million tests done. Now I’m doing the neck cracking and constantly thinking about my neck. I have talked to my primary doctor and chiropractor who both say it’s a anxiety/ocd manifestation and nothing is wrong with me. I was doing so well until I lost the baby and it stirred this all up for me. I’m desperately reaching out for help at this point. I want to travel and be happy and enjoy the one life I have to live. Instead I’m a prisoner in my own mind and body and I can’t enjoy anything because I can’t get out of my own mind and fears long enough to enjoy the moments I’m in. I also have a beautiful amazing 3 year old daughter that keeps me going and I want to be the best version of myself for her. Thank you for listening to my rant I look forward to hearing experiences and meeting other people out there like me. Sometimes it just helps to know your not alone. I find myself watching the people around me and saying see look at them they are so happy nothing is wrong with them. Nobody else experiences what I am going through.

My stomach jumps up every time I catch myself falling asleep. And I do it on purpose. Like I catch myself drifting off, think of my stomach, and then it jumps like when you get really scary news. I know the ERP for this is to just accept the discomfort and allow it to keep happening until I fall asleep, but the discomfort is SO EXTREME because you’re basically going from a very relaxed state to being hit with panic. And you feel it, not just think it. All in a matter of one second. It’s cruel!

Hello, I am still very afraid that I’ve gotten scabies since 4 months back. I’ve been to 3 different doctors and they’ve like slightly looked at the spots and one dermatologist quick with like a big thing that zoomes in the area. Either way, everyone has told me it’s nothing but I still get a little itchy here and there, and I GET RANDOM SCRATCH MARKS ON MY BODY and it says that those can appear with intense itching at night and when you sleep but I don’t feel like I can do that because I don’t have like intense itching. Either way my friend booked us a trip and I got new scratch marks but my time with my dermatologist told me it’s after the trip and I don’t think they have it before, and I’m so scared I’ve contaminated everyone around me. Should I go on the trip or should I cancel and should I stay home until the 29th of January…., I sound crazy but I’m so afraid. I can’t sleep or think

I know skin picking is part of OCD. I’m 35 and been doing this my whole life. I recently started breaking out on my shoulders, chest and back due to hormonal changes and cannot stop picking! I’m causing myself scars it’s so bad. Does anyone know how to stop this??? It’s embarrassing!

Hi! I’m new here. I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD and Generalized + Social anxiety disorder. I’ve had sensory issues for my whole life, but I can generally control and overcome them. The one that is the most bothersome is being aware of my toenails. I’ve dealt with this since I was a child. It doesn’t have anything to do with the length or condition of my toenails at the time, but it’s just my brain becoming aware of the feeling of my toe nails. I also become aware of the feeling of my toes touching. When this happens I can usually move my brain past it. Until this week. 3 weeks ago I fell and broke my leg. I’ve been doing a lot of lying around and wiggling my toes. Well this past week, I’ve become aware of my toes touching (because of my cast- no worries- I stuffed tissue between them and moved on.) last night, my big toe nail stared rubbing my next toe, which triggered the awareness of my toenails. I trimmed my toes nails with no relief. This caused me to not sleep last night. This has become distressing to the point where I’m sobbing because of this. I’ve been googling this and how to get “over it” which just lead my toes sensory overload resources and solutions weren’t very applicable to what I was feeling. I finally came across Somatic OCD. AND BOY WAS I VALIDATED. I also realized it’s probably what’s causing me to be struggling with the feeling of my bladder. It constant feels full, I try to pee, and very little comes out. I’m pretty sure this is linked with my broken leg because of my in ability to get to the bathroom quickly without assistive devices. And, of course, since my fall I’ve been obsessively googling broken legs, recovery time, complications, personal experiences etc. I’ve always been anxious, so I just thought this was anxiety and overthinking. Anyway, this is long and rambling thank you for reading. I feel validated by finding this app and the article that helped me understand somatic OCD.

I need a place to write this out. 18+ only I’m having a pregnancy scare even though there was no P in V action. I’m worried semen might’ve accidentally gotten on my boyfriend’s hand. I know he did not touch himself. I was 1 day outside of my fertile window according to my cycle tracking when the non P in V sexual encounter occurred. I started having very minor left ovary pain 6 days before my period, along with some GI issues. There was flecks (like seriously 2 tiny SPECKS) of blood when I wiped 4 days before my period I’ve never noticed this before my period before. I had my period on time and regular. But I read that girls can mistake implantation bleeding for their period so I started to worry. I took a pregnancy test 3 days after my period ended and it was negative. My left ovary pain is still present the same as it was before my period, but now it’s coupled with minor lower back pain and GI issues. I keep worrying about being pregnant and that I took my pregnancy test wrong. I keep googling symptoms and quizzes trying to see how I compare. I don’t want to take another pregnancy test because I know how this loop works but I can’t stop overthinking.

Anyone been in bedbound situation with pain who has been helped by dealing with ocd fear of pain?